October | 2009 | NewBuddhist

Once in a while on a site like this, we get visitors who are excited to share something that they think is valuable with the community here. Recently, we had a person sign up to the forum and post a link to a free book that was an American interpretation of the dhamma.

It’s great that people want to share things. This is a very welcoming community, but there is still etiquette and protocol to consider.

The problem is; it’s rude to spam, no matter which way you spin it. It’s not that the content of whatever site was linked is not valuable or helpful, it’s the way it was delivered to us.

It is considered impolite–bad online etiquette, if you will–to sign up to any site and, as a first post, make a link to another site. No matter how altruistic the post or link is, it’s considered “spam”. If the poster really wants to share their content with the community that we’ve fostered and built over the years, by all means, they are welcome into our humble home. Engage. Discuss. Make friends. We encourage it!

After they’ve been here for a while, have made some friends, have become a presence, and we can be sure that they’re not here just to get visitors for their site, then by all means, we’ll let them post their links.

Communities like this are online homes. It is just as rude for you to come into my online home and paste advertisements as it would be for you to do it in real life. To me, it’s the same as those annoyingly cute precious old ladies who come to my door with pamphlets advertising all manner of noble and worthy charities.

No matter the message, it’s the method that is distasteful.

In the end, I simply emailed this well-meaning woman, and let her know that after she joined our community and engaged more, she would be more than welcome to post her link. Polite, simple, and the same thing I’d do at home. At least bring brownies or something!

I’m a serial entrepreneur. I’ve been self-employed for over half of my working life. I’ve started three businesses, and learned a lot along the way.

My first business died a quick death because of youth, inexperience, and rapid life changes (marriage, babies). The second became moderately successful (financially), but was undermined and ultimately destroyed by a number of factors, including a massive drop in my state’s economy, as well as plain bad luck and lack of planning for such.

The third was born of passion, however. I am fervently passionate about what I do, and I can truly and honestly say I love my job. I love my job.

The problem is: it doesn’t remotely pay the bills. Not even close.

I have reached that point that any entrepreneur in the audience will understand: Jump off the cliff.

I am standing on the cliff that overlooks the land of dreams. Jumping off of cliffs is scary. There’s no safety net, there’s no guarantee of a soft landing, it’s far, and it’s painful. I could, I should, turn around and walk back to safety.

But behind me is a life of unhappiness and misery. Behind me is a life that I cannot lead. I have accepted and resigned myself to the fact that I am not cut out for that life. I’ve tried; believe me, I’ve tried, to be a member of that world, to live that lifestyle, to play that game. I do not have it in me. One of the things age and wisdom brings is the gift of self-acceptance; I accept that I cannot be that person.

I’m at that point again. The bills are piling up, money is not coming in, and things are looking bleak.

I have found, however, that this is when the magic happens. If I had never gone through this before, I’d be terrified right now.

I’m not scared. I’m tired. I’m introspective. I’m a little sad. But I am not scared.

I’m jumping.

Monthly Archives: October 2009

Spammers that mean well, and how we deal with them

The cliff – jump, or turn around