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Suffering - Fear of After-life?
leahnc
Explorer
I fear afterlife!! The possibilities are endless! As a Christian my whole life, I always believed in Heaven/Hell. Once I started learning about Buddhism I realized rebirth/reincarnation are possibilities too?
But the not knowing for sure what happens to me is causing me a lot of stress. I mainly fear the worst kind of afterlife conceivable (like hell or worse than hell for eternity)
I view the universe as un-friendly for some reason? Even though I have no control over what happens after I die, It frightens me?
I realize no one knows for sure - but I need to be able to view this with a healthy skepticism instead of spending my life worrying about it? Is that even possible?
The thoughts are very intrusive and cause me great suffering.
But the not knowing for sure what happens to me is causing me a lot of stress. I mainly fear the worst kind of afterlife conceivable (like hell or worse than hell for eternity)
I view the universe as un-friendly for some reason? Even though I have no control over what happens after I die, It frightens me?
I realize no one knows for sure - but I need to be able to view this with a healthy skepticism instead of spending my life worrying about it? Is that even possible?
The thoughts are very intrusive and cause me great suffering.
0
Comments
You never know what the future is going to bring. You can't even know what is going to happen tomorrow, let alone what happens after you die. So it is a waste of time to be worrying about it too much. You can contemplate it of course, but don't get caught up in in.
In Buddhism, following the Buddha's teaching prevents rebirth in a lower realm, so you do have control over it. But even if you get reborn in a lower realm, it is not going to be forever because nothing is constant.
With metta,
Sabre
All comes from you and ends with you. Take such energy of suffering and push forward into practice with sincerity. You will have good results if you have patience. We come to buddhism because we suffer. We leave buddhism with our mind and heart open to all the suffering. How else do we conquer the ocean of tears?
Total embrace and total surrender.
So don't worry about what you can't control, but what you can. The choices you make, the way you live, will influence your future.
probably your attitude towards the fear is important. If there are things in your life that you see as unskillful (which means they could have bad consequences) then fear of the consequences can help you to change this behavior. This is a more positive reaction to fear than worrying about it, and it will probably have various other positive effects besides reducing the fear. I would say: be pragmatic about it, don't try to become a saint, just try do a few things more skillfully, and test whether the change brings good or bad results. For the rest, I think it comes down to trusting that if you work on unskillful behavior, you will be okay.
Best,
Maarten
I realized after I wrote this & reading everyone's replies that I have "GIVEN MY POWER AWAY" I lost trust in everything & everybody. SO of course my biggest fears are circling me because I dont trust!
I need to reclaim that Trust & move forward.
I had a big set back 6 months ago & it caused great depression/anxiety/fear! I was hospitalized, put on antidepressants, lost my job. Ever since I feel like I am not in control of anything! Im simply exisiting - Im not truly living. I need to reclaim my life. Hopefully Buddhism will help me do that.
"Afterlife" or "Rebirth" or "Reincarnation" all imply some state of "being" after some type of transference of consciousness or essence or spirit or soul. When you think about it - humans 50,000 years ago interred their departed with accoutrements (sometimes even dogs and other humans that were killed for this purpose) to accompany and aid the departed in their journey beyond life. In that perspective we observe creatures without the assistance of christian missionaries or buddhist sages to teach and inform them about a concept of the afterlife or rebirth. These predecessors simply used primordial imaginative, cognitive ability to conceive of some sort of "afterlife" and address it in what we would call a superstition or spiritual manner - even in a "savage" or "uncivilized" human existence.
The primordial fear of death and all the cogitation surrounding it is still very solidly with us in the 21st century. You are not alone. Thich Nhat Hanh's book: "No Death, No Fear" can be very comforting. Fear is with us all - and we can only "practice" at welcoming fear as an old friend that might rub us the wrong way but doesn't drive us off the deep end. With discipline, self compassion and some luck - we can tame fear - but never destroy this primordial, elemental emotion.
A good meditation practice can help in the setting aside of a rich imagination in favor of living a life according to facts that require no embellishment.
Here's a story I have always liked about a fellow who was interested in death: http://www.101zenstories.com/index.php?story=17
All stories about it are imaginations.
They tell nothing about death; they tell everything about the storyteller.
It’s the same as having frightening dreams. They only prove that we have fears. That simple fact manifests as frightening images in our dreams.
The frightening thing isn’t out there; it isn’t anything real; the fear was there before the thing that appears to cause it.
Frightening images of death, just like nightmares, should make us look at what it really is in our lives that causes such fears (other than death and nightmares.)
All just in my humble opinion.
Dont worry Buddha taught the path of purification rebirth depends upon what karma you have on your mental continuum so to increase the chances of a fortunate rebirth one needs to meditate according to Buddha advise especially on his teachings of love and compassion as these will create positive imprints in the mind that cause a rebirth in the higher realms. Having a fear of lower rebirth in the hell realms is a good thing as this can serve as a motivatiion for us to enage in practice and purify our mind of non virtues that lead us toward hellish rebirth. We have some control over what happens to us because we have an oppertunity now to create the causes for happiness.
And as for the everyday troubles - this too shall pass.....
I may feel differently when my doc tells me I've got a month left to live.
There's actually a half-decent sci fi movie out at the moment called In Time, where you can see how long you have left to live, to the exact second. It's not a brilliant movie, but it's okay, but it gets you thinking how differently we would live life if we truly believed at a heart level that we could die today (or tomorrow).
Would I be typing my drivel on the interweb, while my partner watches TV; both of us sat in different rooms if I really believed I would die later today?
I doubt it.
It's just not a very pleasant meditation, is it?
But how else can you live? Your eyes see a beautiful world, looking at Telly's video above. The feet walk on the earth. We have shoes and clothes to keep us warm. We are not being deployed on a beach with machine gun nests pointed at us. Think of all there is to be thankful for.
How to deal with depression is another topic I think. But remember that you are not alone. I have had depression and I testify that hearing buddhist teachings and making sincere *choices* based upon my hearing has made a large difference in my life.
May you be under the protection of the enlightened beings and the goodness of mankind and may you reclaim the basic trust of the earth as good and the blessings of your senses and mind.
Anyway, I used to have nightmares that I was utterly alone, in the dark, and no one else existed in the universe. Or dreams of a more conventional hell, with fire and flames, but again, utterly alone. It made me very scared all the time and very uneasy.
But I became interested in Buddhist practice after reading HH Dalai Lama's "The Secret of Happiness" and decided that whatever he had, I wanted. I went to meditation classes, read a bit more, and met up with some local Buddhist practitioners and gradually the nightmares faded.
Recently, I got interested in Medicine Buddha practice. He's a Buddha who deals particularly with easing suffering and giving compassion, and the practice is considered very 'safe', even for newbies (he's blue! Blue is considered the colour of healing). I have found I have to choose those practices that focus on compassion and peace - I'm not ready to deal with the scarier things!
When I feel afraid, I remind myself that heaven, earth or hell are all created by our minds: they are all illusory. And so by training our minds, through meditation, we can learn to see the world as it really is. I also remind myself that whatever my emotions or imagination tell me, in reality, we are never alone and we are never unimportant.