A monk laughed at me today

RebeccaS

We (my husband and I) have been looking for a meditation course, and we found a temple we liked the look of and decided to visit their open service this morning.

I had a really terrible time

First off I was really anxious. I had pretty much no sleep last night and when I'm tired I get really anxious, I was really cold and about ten minutes in I had to pee really, really bad and I didn't want to get up because it was so quiet. I sat on a chair rather than a cushion because I figured I'd be more comfortable... But omg I couldn't stop fidgeting! It was so bad! I was tired and I wasn't feeling well... And it was kind of like a church service and I didn't really know what I was doing... Oh man, it was just so bad. It started with some meditation, and I was shaking from cold, but trying to be super quiet... And then they banged a gong and I crapped myself because it was really loud and I wasn't expecting it, and it hurt my ears so I tried to discretely put my fingers in my ears when they banged it and they did a chant I didn't know the words to, which was fine, and then we sat for more meditation and all I could think was "when will it be over? Where is the bathroom?".

And I think the monk noticed because when it was all over and we left the hall he laughed at me In a nice way, though. He spoke at the end, about the purpose of meditation, and he was really nice. I've seen a lot of weirdo gurus and teachers, and I like to think I've gotten pretty good at spotting frauds, but this guy was so nice and genuine. He looked a little angry at first, but when he spoke he spoke like a normal person, no woo woo stuff. He had a pretty thick (Japanese I think? It was a zen temple) accent which would probably just take a little time to get used to and what he was saying was really good. We got a really good vibe from him and from the temple, so we're going to try it out again next week after a proper nights sleep and some thicker socks, making sure we "go" before it gets started.

So it was a little awkward, but in a funny way rather than a really embarrassing way and I definitely want to go back. The meditation course is a five week course and at $150 that's really good value for money. The people there were all sitting really nicely, good posture and none of them were fidgeting so looking at some of the people who have done it I think it's probably a really good course, especially if it's lead by the monk we met today. I liked him a lot and so did my husband.

So yeah, it was good, we both felt really good after. My husband did really well, he got to do some meditation. He didn't like it at first because it was kind of like... Churchy, but he started to like it towards the end. I quite like the devotional aspect of Buddhism so a churchy vibe is kinda cool IMO.

No questions or anything, just sharing. I'd like to hear about your first time temple experiences though!

Bunks

Hey @RebeccaS How funny...... I hope you don't mind me chuckling at your experience.

I felt pretty much the same way when I first went to a meditation class. I felt very self conscious about it all.

Trust me - after a few classes you'll feel much more comfortable I am sure. Then you'll wonder what it was you were anxious about!!

Good luck.

Jeffrey

My first Zen center meditation I had my legs asleep and so I put them out in front of me and I was a big L shape trying to get through the meditation just like you say. I had a chuckle as well

I hate being cold too!

ThailandTom

New experiences often carry a sense of anxiety with them, especially if you have had little sleep as you said. As people have posted I am sure after a few classes you yourself will look back and laugh at it.

A monk laughed at me the other day, well maybe it was with me or at me I don't know. I was walking back from the bank at about 6am (outside ATM and cash deposit deposit), and I had insomnia that day, like today. A monk was coming towards me with his bowl and I said in Thai, "sorry I have no food, I would like to give you some but I have nothing, good luck" ('good luck' is often said in Thai as a way to say goodbye). The monk chuckled and walked on and I smiled and felt a bit silly. He was oldish and then I saw another monk, quite a lot younger. He seemed to be in deep concentration of each step he was taking so I did not say a word to that guy hehe.

I hope you make progress with the classes anyway

RebeccaS

It was all pretty funny. He wasn't being rude or anything, it was very lighthearted and gentle. When we left the center we were laughing about the whole thing

Thanks for sharing your stories! It's good to know I'm not alone

music

RebeccaS said:

It was all pretty funny. He wasn't being rude or anything, it was very lighthearted and gentle. When we left the center we were laughing about the whole thing

Thanks for sharing your stories! It's good to know I'm not alone

Hit him with a stick. If he protests, there's always zen to fall back on.

PrairieGhost

When I first visited a pureland centre, ok, the regulars there and the leader seemed a bit affected and creepy, but there was also a visiting robed monk who grinned at me like a lightbulb.

As soon as I saw him, I sort of knew deep down why he could smile so easily and so wide. It wasn't a wise smile; if anything, it was a foolish smile. The foolishness and sweetness of someone who knows that there is no malice in world.

RebeccaS

That's awesome Yeah, some of the people seemed a little... Off... But overall the vibe was good. Off followers are fine to me, as long as the leader is cool. That's my real concern when I'm looking at these things

OneLifeForm

RebeccaS said:

I had a really terrible time

And then they banged a gong and I crapped myself because it was really loud and I wasn't expecting it, and it hurt my ears so I tried to discretely put my fingers in my ears when they banged it and they did a chant I didn't know the words to, which was fine, and then we sat for more meditation and all I could think was "when will it be over? Where is the bathroom?".

And I think the monk noticed because when it was all over and we left the hall he laughed at me

We got a really good vibe from him and from the temple, so we're going to try it out again next week after a proper nights sleep and some thicker socks, making sure we "go" before it gets started.

So it was a little awkward, but in a funny way rather than a really embarrassing way

I wouldn't have expected to crap myself either and would have definitely not sat through the rest of it after soiling myself, sounds a bit more than awkward

Couldn't resist..

RebeccaS

Omg that is so gross!

karasti

When I went to a day retreat in July (it was a weekend retreat but I could only go one day.) It was a 2 hour drive, and then I had to park like 6 blocks from the location, and carry my cushion and mat with me. I had to go to the bathroom but the only place between my car and the retreat center, was a huge clinic building and I didn't want to haul my cushions with me into the clinic looking for the bathroom. So I figured I'd wait until I just got to the center. Then I got there, got settled, and 2 minutes before the start of the retreat (and a good 10 minute walk to any public restroom) I saw the sign on the door. "no restrooms." I had to sit for 4 hours without being able to use the restroom. The door to the street locks when it closees, so for me to get up and go outside to another building would have interrupted the entire session.

Then on lunch, it was a really hot day, but I wanted to walk during our lunch break because our retreat was on the shore of Lake superior. So I walked for an hour, but it was 95F out and I was a sweaty mess by the time we got back. I didn't get up for our break later because I was afraid I left sweat marks on my cushion due to the thin pants I was wearing. Then at the end when I got up, I stepped on someone else's foot.

federica

It's ok, you know.....
I laugh at myself all the time....!