i read this Hsin Hsin Ming: http://www.holybooks.com/wp-content/uploads/Hsin-Hsin-Ming.pdf
What is written here is theoretically understandable, but what is the problem in practically doing it? it says don't seek truth, just stop cherishing opinions - but can this be practically done? if we start living in this way, then will we not become mechanical robots - as we will not think, or if we think, we will not hold onto it - then how will be live life, means, if there is no goal which we want to attain, then how will be continue our life with no goal to attain, nothing to achieve.
if i try to willfully just be in the current moment, which is going on, usually after 2 to 3 secs, i feel there is something inside me, which tries to see if there is something interesting going on, trying to feel if i am really being in current moment - may be this is restlessness of my mind. but sometimes it happens that i willfully try to be in current moment for sometime, then it seems that things are just going on and there is nothing interesting in being in current moment.
a meditation question - which approach do you all think is better - anapanasati with natural breathing as meditation object or zazen just sitting method with observing whatever is going on in current moment? i have difficulty doing anapanasati with natural breathing as meditation object, since my natural breathing pattern is very irregular and also i do not want to try those approaches of counting the breath, as even feeling the physical sensation of breath at my nose tip is difficult for me, so i just try to be aware of breath coming in and going out, without focussing on any body part. so i am trying to do zazen, which seems slightly easy to do as nothing needs to be done in it, but just observing whatever is going on, without holding onto or rejecting anything and without getting entangled in thoughts - i am not able to do zazen due to my mind's mental chattering, but still i try to just sit daily.
may be i am too stupid person, with too much thinking mind, that it just goes against me totally in my spiritual journey - or may be my ignorance is too much that even theoretically understanding letting go, i am not able to let go - may be my defilements of lust, anger, greed, hatred, attachment and ego are too much in me, that may be even though how hard i try i may not live contentfully in the current moment.
any suggestions, please. thanks in advance.