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Read this story this morning. It's about a man who became ill as a boy and spent over a decade unable to move or communicate. But a couple years into this state, his thoughts started returning, and no one knew it. He has now recovered and is married. Fascinating, but also a sad story. At some points, his mother would say things like "I wish you would die" thinking he didn't hear or understand, when he very much did.
But this caught my eye, with regards to what we tend to "aim" for with meditation. He considers it a dark place to have made his self vanish in that way. Is it the same place we are looking for? Different? Was he suffering too much to see it as a gift or was it not a gift at all?
"So he figured his only option was to leave his thoughts behind.
That was his first strategy — disengaging his thoughts — and he says he got really good at it.
"You don't really think about anything," Martin says. "You simply exist. It's a very dark place to find yourself because, in a sense, you are allowing yourself to vanish." "