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Newbie

Hi,

Thought I would come and introduce myself rather than jumping in and getting lost.

Im Nathan, im 26, born in and still live in Manchester, very new to buddhism, but have always been drawn to it, it's just something I never acted upon until now.

I think the main reason I have acted now is due to a very up and down past year or so, I'm not going to go into much detail, but to sum it up, my marriage of 5 years (yes I married young but had been together since high school) broke down leaving me a single dad to my 5 year old son, i suffered anxiety and depression through this and the circumstances surrounding the whole situation and found meditation to be a great help.

At the moment I do not follow or practice a specific "path" of buddhism, i jus know it's something I need to pursue, and I have began looking locally, mainly at Samatha in Manchester, i just feel drawn and am unable to give a reason why.

My life doesn't allow much free time as I continue to work full time as an Emergency Medical Technician in the Ambulance Service, I believe that my son needs to grow up in a working but humble home, if that makes sense...

So between my son, and my job, my study time and meditation time is restricted to evenings only, which is the main reason I have not attended anywhere up to now.

Anyway, I look forward to talking with you all and learning from those with experience, also any advice regarding practice in Manchester would be great, especially opinions/reviews on Samatha where I'm looking to attend.

Nathan
howEarthninjaTheswingisyellowVastmindCinorjer

Comments

  • Hey everyone I just registered today. But i've been reading posts for the last week or so. I have always been interested in Buddhism, and I have spent a lot of time reading books and articles from a philosophical perspective. I have never fully accepted a path from a religious point of view, but I decided to take that step about a week ago and put everything into practice. I get confused with some basic situations that I see presented every now and then. I understand not wanting or craving, and I don't mean that I am by any means capable of truly understanding any of it at the same time. What confuses me is what is the importance of holding onto ancient texts and vocabulary? as well as what is the importance of having a teacher over studying independently? It seems like so much of our progress on the way to enlightenment is obtained purely through studying our mental state then why is there such a dependence on external factors? We are instructed to focus on experience so I could understand visiting or sitting with someone who is travelling a similar road, but why follow their footsteps with such dedication? When I read about Buddha it seems as though these are behaviors that caused frustration on his own path. I may be coming off as a total newb, but we all start somewhere :)

    On another note, I feel silly when I explain to someone what I am doing on my path. Using words that I can hardly pronounce. I also don't talk that much about my journey because there is much to be done internally before I start professing enlightenment to all.

  • CinorjerCinorjer Veteran

    Welcome and hope you signed up to provide refreshments next month.

    VastmindsilverCuzowenNathan
  • karastikarasti Breathing Minnesota Moderator
    edited May 2015

    There is no dependence on them, it just is to have something to point the way. We are all capable of achieving enlightenment on our own just like Buddha did, theoretically. But in practice, most people would never have thought to put it into any sort of organized discussion or teaching. Buddhism isn't about not interacting with the world around it. It's about not being overly attached to it so that it causes us suffering.

    Everyone has different things they relate to, and different ways of learning. The end "goal" is the same for everyone, but there are a million different paths to get there. Many people here choose not to have a teacher and it works just fine for them. Others find much use in it, but it doesn't mean there is a dependence. Some people find various rituals helpful and I'm sure comforting in some ways. Others find them hokey. Some people think meditation alone is all you need to do. Others disagree. It just depends what you feel is right for you to explore your path, and which tools and resources you will utilize along the way.

    An analogy: I am a minimalist camper. I bring the very least I have to and prefer to make use of what is around me. I prefer backcountry camping. Other people bring all but the kitchen sink when they camp-solar chargers, folding kitchens, heaters, freeze dried food and so on. Other people only camp if it involves a campground with a pool. Some prefer to camp in an RV. It's all still camping.

    Cuzowenlobster
  • interesting. I was just reading something that explained one of the four types of clinging is clinging to rites and rituals, and by clinging to rites and rituals its very easy to practice nonsense.

    I did not sign up to bring refreshments.

    bookwormCinorjerlobster
  • karastikarasti Breathing Minnesota Moderator

    does using something always mean you are clinging to it? I use a lot of things every day that I'm not particularly clinging to. Some things I do. I cling pretty horribly to my husband and our children, for example. A big part of practice is investigating things we are attached to and learning to let go-including Buddhism itself. A popular way it's explained is that Buddhism is just the raft that gets you to the other side, and at that point, even Buddhism has to go away. Rituals and such are no different, just a slightly different raft. Eventually they fall away as well as we continue to let go of all those things. Really, anyone practicing Buddhism is clinging to it to an extent. Some people tend to cling to the idea of what meditation is and what it should result in, for example. There is meditation. And there is clinging to meditation. But to meditate doesn't have to mean to cling. Meditation is a type of ritual, is it not?

    CuzowenJeffrey
  • bookwormbookworm U.S.A. Veteran

    All that really matters to me is that the Buddha has discovered the noble eightfold path leading to the cessation of dukkha, and by following it, I too can attain the cessation of dukkha.

  • anatamananataman Who needs a title? Where am I? Veteran

    @Cuzowen said:
    interesting. I was just reading something that explained one of the four types of clinging is clinging to rites and rituals, and by clinging to rites and rituals its very easy to practice nonsense.

    I did not sign up to bring refreshments.

    Don't worry I have brought some light refreshment:

    Here is the Steak Pun, which is a rare medium, well done....

    ...\lol/...

    CinorjerCuzowen
  • VastmindVastmind Memphis, TN Veteran
    edited May 2015

    Hi...nice to meet you. We don't force you to talk about your journey if you don't want to. And we certainly don't want to hear you profess your enlightenment...hahaha. Just hang out.....learn a little and try it on for size. Only you can answer those questions for yourself. If you don't want to hold on to stuff...don't. One day you might find the need...just be ready for change.. ;)

    Even though you didn't sign up...your more than welcome to visit the treat table. Cups and punch are to the left... :)

    anatamansilver
  • I see meditation as an exercise more so than a ritual. I am strengthening my concentration muscles when I meditate. I do cling to meditation in a sense I need to use it to assist in retraining my mind. This will provide concentrated insight and hopefully assist with lessening my impulsive actions and my dependencies on what I think I know. I think there is a significant difference between using something and having the need to use something.

  • genkakugenkaku Northampton, Mass. U.S.A. Veteran

    Welcome @Cuzowen. Hope you find something useful here.

    Relax -- and remember that you don't have to know a single foreign word in order to practice Buddhism. Or, put another way, all words are foreign to the experience they refer to, so, find a practice that seems to suit you and then, with patience and determination, practice it. Take your time: Text and ritual are only as important as you make them, so, if you consider them unimportant, still there is practice ... and if you do consider them important, still there is practice. Patience, courage and doubt are your great allies.

    PS. I know you didn't sign up to bring the refreshments, but if you don't bring them, how can you expect to enter the sublime and mystical world that evolves after you have swallowed the gold fish? :):

    anatamanCinorjerVastmindlobster
  • Ha Ha! I sat here and tried so hard to think of a funny response to signing up to bring refreshments to the point where I gave up because I was wanting to be funny too bad.

    I look forward to hearing from all sorts of different paths here. I am a very analytical person and think way too much and deep about some things. Sometimes you just need to communicate in order get past little hurdles or thoughts.

    Cinorjersilverlobster
  • karastikarasti Breathing Minnesota Moderator

    So meditation is somewhat of a ritual with a purpose? So are other rituals, like mantras, malas, recitations and so on. Much of it is developing one-pointed concentration. Just different ways of doing so. It is all about training the mind.

  • CinorjerCinorjer Veteran

    "don't mean that I am by any means capable of truly understanding any of it at the same time."

    LOL! Don't worry. I don't think anyone here has been accused of being enlightened. Not to our faces, anyway.

    Cuzowen
  • My mind is so out of shape.

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    @Cuzowen said:
    My mind is so out of shape.

    Welcome to the club!! Mine's got funny pointy bits, which means I can be a bit sharp at times, and blunt with it.

    But like humans everywhere, according to the Hitchiker's Guide, I'm 'mostly harmless'...!

    Nice to have you aboard!

  • KennethKenneth Veteran

    Welcome to you Nathan, from across the pond :)

  • howhow Veteran Veteran

    @Cuzowen said:
    My mind is so out of shape.

    @Cuzowen

    It is easy to think that a mind that's in shape can better captain your ship, when in fact a Buddhist practice is actually about having that captaincy be more of a collegial position where the mind shoulders only it's due load along with all of your other sense gate sources.

    Zennilobster
  • silversilver In the beginning there was nothing, and then it exploded. USA, Left coast. Veteran

    @Nathan said: "At the moment I do not follow or practice a specific "path" of buddhism, i jus know it's something I need to pursue, and I have began looking locally, mainly at Samatha in Manchester, i just feel drawn and am unable to give a reason why. My life doesn't allow much free time as I continue to work full time as an Emergency Medical Technician in the Ambulance Service, I believe that my son needs to grow up in a working but humble home, if that makes sense... So between my son, and my job, my study time and meditation time is restricted to evenings only, which is the main reason I have not attended anywhere up to now. "

    Hi Nathan, welcome in. I think you may consider it lucky for you and your son that you are going to raise him. Just a hunch. You're lucky too, to have f-t work like that. A very respected profession. Maybe you feel - now that you've made a move in the direction of learning more about Buddhism - that the more structured environment, the better for you and your son. Sounds like a plan.
    B)

    EarthninjaNathan
  • TheswingisyellowTheswingisyellow Trying to be open to existence Samsara Veteran
    Nathan,
    Welcome. No need to rush, I think the path can present so many different avenues it can feel overwhelming. At least that's what I found when I first started out. I have been an ER RN for sometime and have found my meditation practice to be of immense benefit. Sorry for your recent difficulties, best to you in your endeavors.
    VastmindNathan
  • ZenniZenni Veteran

    @Cuzowen - welcome =)

  • VastmindVastmind Memphis, TN Veteran

    Hello...Nice to meet you.
    You'll make time for it as you see fit. Your son is going to turn out to be your best monk/teacher. :mrgreen:
    We don't check time cards here .... But if your slackin'...we might tell you..hahaha

    silverNathan
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    edited May 2015

    the reason foreign words are used is because using english would be confusing. 'awakening' is an example but it is an english word. In Sanskrit we can translate right to the word 'awakening' so we can use it in English. But when the dharma was 'ported' to Tibetan language the word 'awakening' is not so grand it just means you are not asleep. So if they used the Tibetan word for 'awake' it would be misleading and non-inspiring. So in Tibetan when they talk about awakening they say a word that means 'fully flowered of a plant or tree'. But if we use the word 'fully flowered' in english it might seem odd so we can use 'awake'.

    Another example is 'suffering'. The word 'dukkha' is used and the reader knows that they must unpack the word into it's meaning rather than just the normal understanding of suffering which might be used in mistaken understanding.

    The teacher is there to point out a method to the student. for that to happen the student has to have the right qualities. One flaw is to not be open like a cup that is face down. Another flaw is to hear the teaching but then immediately forgot it or like a leaky cup. Another flaw is to have poison in the cup that subverts the teaching received into 'ego' or 'aggression' or whatever is the poison. i believe that the refuge to Buddha includes receiving the teaching whether it is from a living teacher or a book or even just in a yogic experience of the mind.

    if we could stop 'craving' easily the dharma would be selling like hot cakes. but no it is actually a very long path.

    Zenni
  • CinorjerCinorjer Veteran

    Hello and welcome!

  • genkakugenkaku Northampton, Mass. U.S.A. Veteran

    Welcome @Nathan and all best wishes.

    bookwormlobsterCinorjer
  • lobsterlobster Veteran

    @Cuzowen said:
    Ha Ha! I sat here and tried so hard to think of a funny response to signing up to bring refreshments to the point where I gave up because I was wanting to be funny too bad.

    I look forward to hearing from all sorts of different paths here. I am a very analytical person and think way too much and deep about some things. Sometimes you just need to communicate in order get past little hurdles or thoughts.

    Hello B)

    How refreshing. Somone who fails at humour after deep analysis. ;)

    Interaction is part of 'the Middle Way'.

    We engage with our and others mind. Partly through study.

    About ancient texts: You can also read modern interpretations of Ye Olde Dharma.
    http://secularbuddhism.org

    ... as I said to the Buddha just recently, 'Dude what have they done with your hair?' Of course he could not hear me as his hair, hearing and teaching days are long gone ... <3

    Cinorjer
  • DairyLamaDairyLama Veteran Veteran

    @Nathan said:...also any advice regarding practice in Manchester would be great, especially opinions/reviews on Samatha where I'm looking to attend.

    I've had some involvement with Samatha Trust and I would recommend them. Very solid meditators and a straightforward practical approach.

    Nathan
  • null
    Fantastic, are you from Manchester by any chance or have you been involved with them elsewhere?
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