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Me, Me and More 'Me'!
lobster
Veteran
As we know the smallest wheel is ourselves. The Hinayana of our suffering and the means to overcome its excesses. We can practice meditation, mindfulness and metta mayhem and be happy little bunnys.
That's the plan!
... and then? More me? Widened 'me'? No me found? It never was all about me?
https://janeadamsart.wordpress.com/2012/10/25/sacred-india-tarot-archive-rohit-aryas-essay-on-the-buddha/
3
Comments
Dear Lobbie, I skimmed the story in the link, but Nothing can rise above the telling of the Buddha's life story as shared by Master TNH in Old Path White Clouds...My complaint is that rather typically, the woman - the friend - the wife of Buddha was missing - a whole component of what Buddha was all about - they were friends who shared the same feelings about life's miseries and suffering, and he did not steal off into the night because she (according to TNH's book) laid out the clothes for him, instructed the helper to ride out with him when all was quiet so they could slip out without anyone else knowing. Anyone who adores Buddha and Buddhism is missing out on plenty by not taking a look at this book. (I loved the part where he was giving out precious necklaces to each of the available women at a party and ... well, I won't give it away to those who don't know about it. It's just so sweet.)
Thank you, Master Hanh for a most wonderful book.
The deepest happiness I find is when you do something nice for someone. It moves something deep inside a person.
Recently a strong resolve in me is to wake up so I can help others find the way. I think about all these people around me suffering their minds and don't know how to get out of it. A friends brother killed himself a while back and you can only imagine the mental suffering he would of been going through.
I think we all have a strong aspect of selfishness in us, whether we admit it or not.
I want to be able to help someone completely out of suffering, not just provide then with temporary relief. Although that's all I can do now. I still feel like a hypocrite.
I do happiness seminars with local businesses at the moment just giving mindfulness advice and gratitude journals etc.
I heard something that pushed my resolve even further.
"True compassion is when there are no prejudices, you want to see all beings in bliss and happiness"
"If you just want to help a certain type of monkey but hate snakes that is not compassion, that is just passion"
Makes me think I have work to do!
not that I hate snakes. Haha. 
And I'm sure @lobster is going to crack a Hinayana joke.
@Earthninja said "I think we all have a strong aspect of selfishness in us, whether we admit it or not.
I want to be able to help someone completely out of suffering, not just provide then with temporary relief. Although that's all I can do now. I still feel like a hypocrite."
True...Do you know how to help someone completely out of their suffering? And why would you feel like a hypocrite over it? That I don't get. I think we have to be content with being able to help someone just once, or a little here and a little there - or maybe not at all, because it's the individual who has to make the actual adjustments and changes...almost sounds like you want the credit - just surmising, not accusing, but trying myself to give YOU something to think about. Sometimes, we're unable to help our own family and friends because it's up to them.
@silver I don't know how to help someone permanently because I don't know for sure myself, I feel a hypocrite because I take happiness seminars but I wouldn't say I'm happier than the person next to me.
. I give out bandaids to people and use them myself. Guess I'm not that much of a hypocrite in that regard.
Hmm maybe? Could be spiritual pride, trying to save others when they could save themselves. What to do? It just seems better to try and help others, I see the pain we all share but no way out. Therapy isn't permanent, anti depressants don't always work, alcohol makes things worse...
Because I understand this frustration( Dukkha) I'm personally seeking a way out. My resolve is to help others because what would I be without them? Why help myself if they aren't in my life?
What do you do/think about helping others?
Helping others out of suffering, even if it's temporary relief, is still a smart thing to do. The person you're helping benefits and so do we. I can't see what's hypocritical about that.
The practise of compassion has helped me stay sober and relatively sane for the past six years and I find that I (me me me) benefit greatly from it. You know, I'm pretty rubbish at doing something just for myself. Like if I had to go to an A.A. meeting purely because it helps me stay sober, I probably wouldn't bother my arse to go. I'll watch TV or surf the internet instead, with a 'Oh, I'll be okay' attitude. Even though I know that A.A. meetings are good for me.
But if I go to an A.A. meeting because I know there's someone I might be to help there, I'm there; it's not like I even have a choice in the matter (I don't like choices because I'll often choose the lazy option). So the person I'm trying to help may benefit, and I definitely benefit; I call that a win-win situation.
I find there's a lot of power in the practise of compassion.
Being kind to the best of our ability is just human decency, not some great spirtual achievement. Please ... we all know that.
So the question of hypocrisy arises and we are all partly hypocrites. Part of the hypocrisy and delusion, in the Buddhist sense, is 'the blind leading the blind'. We are often attracted to rogues, hypocrites and fantastical teachers because we require:
However there is hope and it is this:
Part of us is genuine, is pure, is true, is Buddha Nature. That part is what we share in good faith and companionship. That is the integrity, honesty and genuine aspiration. We turn to Sangha and teachers for praiseworthy qualities. Direct 'Heart of the Teaching' pointers.
... oh I feel all goodly now ... Plan iz workin' ...
@Earthninja asks 'What do you do/think about helping others?'
I grew up in a home that was not only having a strong work ethic, but very giving and at the ready to help others...the big lesson is that they gave and helped when it was appropriate.....that's what I observed anyway...I'm sure even they weren't perfect as families go. All we can do is decide if helping or giving is appropriate and timely for each given situation. And sometimes, we goof up! It's probably the times when the helping hand or good advice or a shoulder to cry on comes and goes with barely a notice that we do the most good - it just is a seemingly seamless part of life!
(mulan)
Occasionally I get lucky and do something or say something that permanently changes someone's life in some small way. Generally it seems to be unintended when it happens.
I don't have much hope of being able to share any insights with someone else. Experience tells me that my ability to explain it so that it anything other than mundane thoughts or gibberish is limited to doing it in writing so that it can be edited; and then is it really an insight?
I think the most important help I can give is to my children.
Perhaps I can try to correct some negative patterns that have been running through my family tree. Maybe insert some positive traits.
Though, the fact that my ancestry goes back to the beginning of time proves that whatever has happened, it's been working.
^^^ outstanding post @robot in which the essence of dharma is expressed without couching it in Buddhist catch phrases and doing good for karma or heavenly rewards.
We correct ourself. We help our family, friends, virtual and actual sangha (if available).
To be a good person to the best of ones being and capacity is just common sense. A wonderful opportunity.