Interesting awareness
Mingle
Veteran
Something I've noticed lately after integrating mindfulness into my life. I can really see how the mind starts painting pictures without my consent. Like Ive noticed when I see someone that my mind all of a sudden starts giving them a backstory pretending I know everything about them and now its as If my mindfulness is penetrating through the bs and going "come on you know nothing about this person, be realistic". Its amazing how the mind jumps ahead of itself, Ive noticed this with writing too. Sometimes I can read something and my mind assumes something only to find when I re-read it its something completely different. Even just now I was having a conversation with someone with a different lifestyle to me and I could hear his words and I felt my mind taking those words and painting a picture of how I should be like him and I'm not good enough. All this nonsense going on in my head when really all were doing is just having a conversation. Progress??
Comments
Erm...not in my opinion, no.... but not sure I'm totally getting you....?
I actually find myself thinking, if someone is rude, that there must be a great sadness in their life if they feel entitled to act that way... or if someone cuts me up driving, rather than immediately succumb to 'road rage' and consider them an idiot, I don't know if his mother just got taken to hospital, or his wife is having a baby, or she's rushing to get to the school because they've rung her to tell her her child is sick...
I paint a picture of compassion and understanding... rather than one which is based totally on fantasy and envy....
is that what you mean...?
I mean Im seeing through my bs way of thinking. How what I think isn't accurate compared to what is. I'm noticing how my mind is jumping to conclusions based on my self limiting beliefs and how when I see a person they are not my projections they are just a person.
Ah,....
:
So in other words, the BS is beginning to smell....?
Right....!
You notice your thought patterns and are changing them.
Your distorted perceptions are being brought to an abrupt halt.
Gotcha.....
Yep. I think then, that's progress....
One day, you won't even have to correct.
Honestly....
Now I've noticed the distortion and can correct myself will I one day find my emotional response will change too. For instance if someone starts talking about money my mind may go " I wish I had more money, once I have as much money as this guy I will be happy" and I feel down and inferior but at this point mindfulness kicks in and I realise I know nothing about this guy and how do I know if this guy is happy all I've done is project my insecurity of feeling I don't earn enough onto them and my mind started jumping to conclusions. I still feel down though and I am aware of the impact of the irrational thinking. My question though is will the feeling down reaction change because of this?
Yes, but you need to transform your thought.
You need to not only think -
You then need to add, "Money does truly NOT buy happiness. If it did, all millionaires would be living in perpetual ecstasy. I know this man may have more money than I, but it's highly probable he has more problems too... More money means more responsibility....and will his money will prevent old age, sickness, death? No. He is subject to Suffering as much as anyone else."
All this, you will perceive in an instant.
All this, you will immediately understand, and your criticism will convert to Compassion.
the best way to convert envy into empathy is to give of yourself. Even if it is just through a handshake.
Try it.
Find a good friend.
Tell them you want to try an experiment.
Shake hands with them as if you hate and envy them.
Then shake hands with them, transmitting Kindness and Compassion.
See if they sense it. The difference is literally palpable.
@Mingle, consider that your "feeling down" can also be thought of as a "painting", just like the stories your monkey-mind invents during encounters with acquaintances and such. Just as your recognition that those stories are facades can limit their impact, even make them vanish, so your acceptance that these feeling-down mental formations are also illusory and transient, can make them less worrisome to you.
Short answer: yes, your reaction will change. In fact it already has.
And thanks for posting this as it is something I wrestle with all the time.
@Mingle
Welcome to the fruits of meditation.......
Meditation is just our attempts at allowing all the data of seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, feeling and thinking..to freely arise, live and depart, where our identity programing would otherwise have corrupted that data to support it's own dream.
With each breath,
another lotus
unfolds.
Sounds like too much intellectualization and verbosity for a stint of awareness.
When I am aware, I tend to fade non-verbal.
Progress? Well, if you consider that you are more aware now than before... it could be called progress.
Progress as in advance, going farther...? Where to?
@DhammaDragon its like I can just see my thoughts for what they are, just negative thoughts. I have always known that but now I can feel it if that makes any sense, I feel like when I start thinking negatively I can make the choice to not let it spoil my day. I'm also having counselling if that's the culprit.
@Mingle: it's quite a step forward if you can voluntarily choose not to let your negative thoughts spoil your day.
Some people wrestle for years with that.
@DhammaDragon not all the time though. I've found that the better my meditation the sooner I can detect negativity and not acknowledge it. Like after I've been to my sangha. Days where my mind isn't so peaceful the thoughts kinda sneak up on me and I get caught up in them.
Yes this is progress. Keep going.
Every single thing in the world "shouts" their story/label/value at you. In reality this is what happens in your own mind. You can see that even simple things as the colors are labeled in the same way. Everything has a name which is tied to a value of that thing. Nama-Rupa.
These stories as you call them are elaborate fabrications. Identifying them in the process and trying to see through them is what is is all about.
Keep going. Try to understand the dukkha, anatta and anicca in relation to the dependent origination. This might help in progress.
Cheers
Victor
Ps
This is not Buddism Basics.
This is advanced practice even if you are at the beginning of the process.
Cheers again.
Ds.
What is your immediate response in those situations? Do you still say something under your breath (or out loud!) but not allow the anger or frustration to develop? That is where I'm at currently, I did it only this morning when I made a comment about someone's driving but immediately let it go when I realised I said it, then forgot about it until reading your post.
I'm going through a confusing stage atm. I just can't seem to shake all this doubt. My mind just doesn't seem to want to work with Buddhism. I find my mind is filled with so much conflict as to what to accept as truth.
Ah yes a mind full of doubt or certainty/dogma no use at all ... ain't it the truth ...
I would say most definitely! Most people are not aware of such things and don't even know these stories are entirely false and self created. They don't even know they are making a story to begin with. They take them as actual reality when in fact they are not even close!
Well said @seeker242 I would not trust my mind to think anything, let alone the arisings from doubts, body arisings (so to speak), inclinations, 'inspirations' etc.
Fortunately I also have a mind discipline. I regularly just like a 'horse whisperer', train my mind and emotions with 'Buddha whispering'.
I sound like some glorified saint. I'm not.
But I recognise an inhibiting emotion when I get one......
Try not accepting anything as truth for now. Just practice and see what happens.
Insight into workings of the mind. Observe and wait for realization. I will not tell you what the realization is, because that would spoil it totally.