Brand New and Difficult Experience, Help Greatly Appreciated!
spencerstone
VeteranEast Coast USA Veteran
Hello all,
I am brand new to this site and I am writing from the mountains in a rural town in Western North Carolina, I'm not sure where the majority of the rest of people are from, but I assume this is a fairly diverse forum. I joined this website in hopes of finding others to share this journey with and maybe to receive some guidance through the transition into Buddhism. So, first, a bit of background information, I am almost 18 and go to a secluded boarding school in NC. I grew up Methodist with my family, but never really connected with Christianity like many of my peers did. I got confirmed in the Methodist church at age 13, but never felt the change in my life that I had hoped for. Being from a rural mountain town, there was really no exposure to other religion, it was solely Christianity. My parents are both "Christians" but are both more spiritual than anything. My mother meditates and believes in Karma and has no problem seeing the inherent and obvious flaws in Christianity. I think they both would better be served as Buddhists, but that's not my call. Anyway, once I made the choice to attend boarding school to broaden my horizons three years ago, I was ready for a change. The school I attend is Presbyterian, but the many of the students here are not Christian. There are students from over 35 different countries and really served to expand my mindset.
This year has really been a breakthrough year for me. I attended a Student Diversity Leadership Conference in Florida with 2,000 other students from around the country and globe, and that was life changing. I met many Buddhists there who had been through similar experiences, and that helped open my mind and make me realize that identifying with a religion (Christianity) I don't believe in helps no one at all. So, after the conference, I came home and started my conversion to Buddhism. I started meditating daily, and watching as many informative Youtube videos and helpful articles as I could. I have started reading a book by Thích Nhất Hạnh, one by HHDL, and another historical and information book on Buddhism. One of the main problems I have run into is the lack of a mentor or even someone to share this experience with. All of my friends are supportive and I've even talked to our preacher at our school and he is willing to help me our but the problem is he knows nothing at all about Buddhist practices, culture or ideologies. So I am coming here today to ask if anyone has any advice or recommendations for me, they would be greatly appreciated. Thank you, and I'd love to continue my story or conversation with anyone who is interested!
Comments
Hello Welcome
You are doing all the right things. Study, meditating, gaining instruction/inspiration from modern media. Finding companionship, virtual to start with.
My advice is start
... and then continue.
That is my plan anyhows ...
Hi spencerstone and welcome. My teacher has a number of youtube videos but they are usually around 1 hour length or more. She also records (in writing) some of the questions she gets asked by her students and anyone who joins Buddhism Connect can get a mailing of these questions or view them on Facebook.
Here is a link to a talk on youtube about meditation:
Here is a link to Buddhism Connect facebook page (open to all):
https://www.facebook.com/BuddhismConnect/
Welcome. Nice to meet you.
I don't have a lot of advice to offer you, being pretty new to Buddhism myself.
You're pretty much doing what I am. Reading, meditating, and participating here.
@spencerstone
Welcome! This is a good place to get some measurement of the breadth and scope of Buddhism.....or at least a pretty friendly version of it.
I'd also consider just trusting your meditation to be your mentor/teacher for now.
When the student is truly ready, teachers just start appearing everywhere..
Actually they were always all around us, just hidden from view by our misconceptions of what we thought the teacher for us should look like.
and your present studies of Buddhism can allow you to see what forms or schools of practice best free your own heart & mind from your own conditioned nature.
You should of seen how much of a workout that was before the internet.
Keep up the meditation practice, and look around your school library for introductory books on Buddhism. Read about the basic principles, if you haven't already. You sound mature, and that conference sounds awesome! And it sounds like you have a cool mom. She may have been more of an influence on you than you're aware of.
Keep up the good work, and welcome! You came to the right place.
G'day @spencerstone - welcome!
I spent a couple of months in NC a few years ago. Are you anywhere near Asheville? It struck me as a bit of an alternative kind of town (more so than Charlotte!)
If you are, there are a few buddhist centres there. Might be worth checking them out if you can get there.
Some advice to you - patience and persistence are your friends.
Good luck! Would love to keep hearing about your ongoing practice.
This is excellent advice.
My favourite is 'meditation for dummies'.
The important thing is not how 'advanced' [lobster rinses his mouth out with soap] but how we digest what we read.
Don't be too eager to consume, chew ...
So it is permissable to read the same book by different people. As Buddhism is about change, you might come back to the same book/advice and realise you [gulp] ... gulp ...
Welcome @spencerstone. Hope you find something useful here.
You sound as if you were on the right track. Don't rush it. Practice. See what happens. Try to remember that no one was ever born with a spiritual persuasion so the spiritual persuasion you choose is entirely your business and your responsibility. Will it make you a better, happier person? Maybe. Will it make you a worse and sadder person? Maybe. The only way to find out is, as always, to try it out.
Take your time. It's your life. Enjoy yourself and don't fret too much about "success" or "failure." As a buddy of mine is fond of saying, "Wherever you go, there you are." So ... pay attention, take responsibility and when you hear a good joke, have a good laugh.
Best wishes.
Hi! Nice to meet you. .....Look around, read and join in.
Good Sangha group here.
Yes, I actually live about an hour away from Asheville and it is a pretty alternative, hippie type of town. I haven't explored the Buddhist workings of Asheville but I will be sure to check them out this summer!
Thank you for the advice, I need all of it that I can get!
Welcome @spencerstone I hope you enjoy the forum, I have found it a very helpful place to ask questions. In addition to Wikipedia, YouTube, a few books, online sutra collections, and other wisdom you can make a fair start in Buddhist learning purely online only, which will suffice for a few years. But having a real teacher to discuss things with takes things to the next level, and I would recommend it.
Welcome @spencerstone I'm also new to this site, I joined May 12th. I've been practicing Buddhism for over 2 years now and I'm certainly a better and more peaceful man than I was before. I wish I'd known about Buddhism at the age of 18, I think I would have enjoyed life more if I had, (I'm 61.). Like you I'm self taught. You can't go wrong reading book's by Thich Nhat Hahn, he a saint of a human being. Podcasts are nice because you can listen and learn to pronounce Buddhist words properly. Lately I've been listening to free podcasts by Tara Brack, you might enjoy those. Good luck and best wishes.
Welcome @herberto
very often we feel we have much to learn. If fortunate that never goes until we reach the alleged omniscience of the Buddha Godhead Good luck with that Fairy tale. 
New Buddhists are very instructive, we can reflect on how weird we may be [good reminder for me]
and get a chance to flex any nascent dharma muscles ... 
Start living as per eightfold path and you will be master of Buddhist concepts. And whenever you feel sad then remember arya satya.
You are already doing meditation is great plus.
As far as mentor is considered, life is great mentor.
Welcome! Your sincerity and determination are quite admirable.
One point to keep in mind is that there are quite a few people who do not call themselves "Buddhist" but who nevertheless embody many of the Buddhist principles. They let go more easily, they are more in touch with their natures, they try to help those around them first and their thinking is more fluid and open. I think that if you study the Buddhist books you are studying and, most importantly, put in your best effort to practice what they are teaching, you will naturally come it touch with more of those people.
I have found that the state of mind does shape and affect reality that we live in. Therefore, cultivate the mind and have faith. Growth, wonderful encounters and spiritual joy will follow.