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I got scammed

BunksBunks Australia Veteran

So a lesson below for any lonely bored guys and gals about webcam and its pitfalls.

I spent yesterday afternoon on a popular dating site (filipinocupid) chatting to ladies and getting to know a few. Some encouraged me to go to Skype and talk there which seemed fine. One genuine lady even called me and we had a nice chat. She seemed lovely!

Anyway, long story short. Eventually one lady coaxed me into doing a sexcam with her and guess what!? She filmed it and blackmailed me! She said she will post the video on Facebook if I don't pay her.

I sent her money initially. Not a huge amount but enough then she started asking for more. I went and saw my ex wife and we did some research. All the advice suggested I shouldn't give them anymore money and to cease all contact. I have done that and started to delete any relevant software she may be able to use to get to me or compromise me.

Her last message said she will post the video on Facebook in about 3.5 hours if I don't pay more.

Needless to say I am a little nervous right now......hoping it's just a hoax!

I guess I finally have my own sex tape! Being rhe uncool cat I am it was inevitable that it would just be me in it! :-D

Steve_Blobster

Comments

  • ShoshinShoshin No one in particular Nowhere Special Veteran

    @Bunks

    What's the worst thing that can happen?
    And if it does...what can you do about it?
    If you can do something about it ...why worry !
    And if you can't do anything about it...worrying is not going to solve anything !

    ~Shantideva~ (well, a modern day take on what he said )

    Keep this in mind @Bunks

    lobsterZenCanuck
  • federicafederica seeker of the clear blue sky Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    if it appears - the moment it appears - it will be reported and taken down. Facebook doesn't take kindly to porn being distributed on their sites They're usually very speedy at stamping out stuff of that nature. . The likelihood of it being seen by anyone you know, is remote. If anyone quizzes you, deny, deny, deny.

    Don't do it again.
    And yes, they're probably bluffing.
    Maintain no contact.

    lobsterVastmindBunks
  • BunksBunks Australia Veteran

    Thanks @shoshin. Trying to bear that in mind.
    As my ex aaid to me, they have nothing to gain by posting it. Opens up the possibility of them getting caught plus shuts down any chance of getting any more money from me in the future.

  • lobsterlobster Veteran
    edited December 2016

    Pah!

    Pay no more as others say.

    Scammers, blackmailers, phishers are all trying to make a living BUT not at your expense. You have done nothing to be ashamed of. They should be ashamed ...
    You probably feel a bit fooled/foolish/humiliated ... ah well ... you did nothing strange/shameful.

    PS. Were any sheep involved? Just askin' ... ;)

    ShoshinkarastidhammachickBunks
  • ShoshinShoshin No one in particular Nowhere Special Veteran
    edited December 2016

    @Bunks ...look on the bright side...

    As @federica has already mentioned, FB will quickly remove any offensive material....the only other sites she'll be able to post it on are porn sites, (which will make you a porn star...your fifteen minutes of fame :wink: ;) ): and if any of your friends or family do see it, "on a porn site", I doubt they would say much, for fear of their porn habit being found out... Breath easy @Bunks ...It's a lesson learnt :)

    lobster
  • kusalokusalo Monterey, California New

    Was your wife your "ex" before or after this, uh, unfortunate incident?

    What channel on FB and how will we know how to recognize our now newly [in]famous NB brother?

    More seriously, this scam belongs in the "oldest ones in the book" category. It's amazing people still get taken in, along with the likes of male member enlargement, or the email from an overseas law firm advising that a large inheritance awaits you if you send the related processing fee.

    But it's brave of you to post and maybe save someone, fresh back from a remote cave meditating without internet access for fifteen years, from falling for it.

  • federicafederica seeker of the clear blue sky Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    Oooh, touch of sarcasm there, I think I can sense it....

  • Steve_BSteve_B Far southwest corner of Indiana, USA Veteran

    @federica said:
    Oooh, touch of sarcasm there, I think I can sense it....

    I concur.
    But I do agree that it was impressively brave of Bunks to post that. I'm not sure I could do the same, even though I don't really "know" anyone here in the traditional sense.

  • federicafederica seeker of the clear blue sky Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator

    After some of the things I've read on this board, and in the Applicants' reasons for wishing to join? Nothing surprises me any more.... :D

  • NamadaNamada Veteran
    edited December 2016

    .

  • karastikarasti Breathing Minnesota Veteran
    edited December 2016

    It's a good warning. It's easy for someone whose smart about this stuff to get caught up in something when they are lonely or want some connection with people. I feel ya, @Bunks! I'm sorry it happened to you! Kudos to you for sharing. It is not something I would have thought of, either. Having been married, you kind of get out of those scenes. Net sexing has been around for a long as the internet, but it's changed dramatically in the past 10 years, even the past 5 years. Those of us out of those circles due to marriage wouldn't know what can happen, because how it was before was mostly safe. Compared to now anyhow.

    On the plus side, even if she posted it on FB, the only way she can connect you to it is to tag you, right? Or am I not thinking of something? Change your preferences so that your info is all private, and change your tagging preference so that you are alerted to approve anything you are tagged in. Then how could she post something of you that anyone who knows you will ever see? Or, deactivate your account temporarily until you are no longer concerned. You can even set it to be temporary, then your account is not findable at al in a search even by someone who is friends with you.

    lobsterVastmind
  • lobsterlobster Veteran
    edited December 2016

    I feel you are very brave and open to post this. Bravo. We are all foolish, drawn in, scammed by commercial, political, religious, sexual interests. We really are.

    I apologise for laughing. [baahhh] Down Flossy! :3

    Really. Really. Move on.

    Bunks
  • silversilver In the beginning there was nothing, and then it exploded. USA, Left coast. Veteran

    @Bunks said:
    Thanks @shoshin. Trying to bear that in mind.
    As my ex aaid to me, they have nothing to gain by posting it. Opens up the possibility of them getting caught plus shuts down any chance of getting any more money from me in the future.

    Didn't W. C. Fields have something to say about one being born every minute or something like that? o:)

  • dhammachickdhammachick crazy Aussie BUJU Sydney, Australia Veteran

    @Bunks said:

    I guess I finally have my own sex tape! Being rhe uncool cat I am it was inevitable that it would just be me in it! :-D

    My advice would be to always wax from now on :awesome:

    But seriously, I'm glad your ex wife is an ally in this.

    _ /\ _

    Bunks
  • BunksBunks Australia Veteran

    Ha! Thanks guys. All comments (even the sarcastic ones!) appreciated.
    Nothing on FB as yet as far as I'm aware. I deactivated my account last night.

    lobsterVastmindkarastiShoshin
  • KeromeKerome Love, love is mystery The Continent Veteran

    Well sex tapes are all the rage these days, I'm told that some celebrities even scare up publicity by releasing their own. So I doubt it would be a big deal in general internet circles... in one's private circle of Facebook friends it might be a bit embarrassing but certainly not the end of the world. There's worse on Chatroulette every second of the day, I'm sure.

    Best to be more careful in future though...

    Bunks
  • ShoshinShoshin No one in particular Nowhere Special Veteran

    @Bunks remember .... Old habits die hard ...It's so easy to slip back into old ways( our "comfort" blankets) that are well entrenched in our thought patterns, especially when there's been major disruptions to ones life....

    This is why one has to be diligent when it comes to ones practice, otherwise the self will be up to its old tricks again...

    Remember.... it's important to have "compassion" for oneself...not self pity....

    May you and your family be well @Bunks

    dhammachickBunkslobsterVastmind
  • BunksBunks Australia Veteran

    Bleas you @shoshin. Constructive and compassionate feedback appreciated....

    ShoshinVastmind
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