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So a recent trend in my meditation has been a niggling, sometimes thundering doubt that I don’t know what I’m doing. This voice says things like:
“I’m not doing the right practice. Breath-focus is a basic technique and I should have moved on by now.” (FYI, I do do other practices from time to time.)
“I’m terrible at meditation. What good is it doing me or anyone, if I can’t even do it properly?”
“I’m not spending long enough doing this each day.”
And so on, all within a mind that has become quite prone to meditative dullness recently.
Has anybody else experienced periods of disillusionment with meditation? Did you overcome them?
It strikes me as perfectly ironic that being so unsure of myself, is actually a sign that I’m sure of my [space] self. I’m sure that these doubts are “mine”, sure that my meditative progress is part of “me”. Do you know what I mean?