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about letting go, not sure what its exactly
newtech
Veteran
Hello.
So i was thinking: "im meditating in the breath, some distraction arise,i say to me ok im distracting, i kinda force my mind to go back to the object and forget about that disturbtion,get inmerse on the breath, im back on the breath,im fully breathing, i did it, im letting go".
But the other day was sitting in the terrace, just enjoying the sun, not even "meditating", saying this moment its perfect, why im not feeling complete perfection.I started identifying myself to some tension and a mental need to be tense, remembering sayings about letting go and unidentifying with the tension,
then i recognize a moment of choice, not sure how to put it, but a moment where i can really choose instead of just forgetting, experiencing, or concentrating in something else, not sure if was only choosing, maybe something else, i could clearly see the tension like something u can get out of the system. If now i say ok i choose not to feel this, doesnt feel real so cant be only that. Of course i start feeling really well, like never before, 0 emotional garbage, complete happiness, euphoric,even to much..
The problem its in the moment i say "ok, so this i was missing, now i see clearly, i completely understand this". Next day i did the same with almost same result. Next day the logic kinda change. Then i start missing something.
Now dont understand exactly what where the ingredients i use..but im begginning to understand its about renunciation more than concentration,
about letting go something.
how do you do it??, any comment? any text? sutta?
Thanks a lot!
So i was thinking: "im meditating in the breath, some distraction arise,i say to me ok im distracting, i kinda force my mind to go back to the object and forget about that disturbtion,get inmerse on the breath, im back on the breath,im fully breathing, i did it, im letting go".
But the other day was sitting in the terrace, just enjoying the sun, not even "meditating", saying this moment its perfect, why im not feeling complete perfection.I started identifying myself to some tension and a mental need to be tense, remembering sayings about letting go and unidentifying with the tension,
then i recognize a moment of choice, not sure how to put it, but a moment where i can really choose instead of just forgetting, experiencing, or concentrating in something else, not sure if was only choosing, maybe something else, i could clearly see the tension like something u can get out of the system. If now i say ok i choose not to feel this, doesnt feel real so cant be only that. Of course i start feeling really well, like never before, 0 emotional garbage, complete happiness, euphoric,even to much..
The problem its in the moment i say "ok, so this i was missing, now i see clearly, i completely understand this". Next day i did the same with almost same result. Next day the logic kinda change. Then i start missing something.
Now dont understand exactly what where the ingredients i use..but im begginning to understand its about renunciation more than concentration,
about letting go something.
how do you do it??, any comment? any text? sutta?
Thanks a lot!
0
Comments
In my experience it is kind of paradoxical. If I think of a good feeling and I think how I have to get the tension and pain OUT...? Then I feel worse.
But if I say oh tension is no big deal. I can deal with this tension. Oh how interesting this tension is. Welcome tension.
If I say those things the tension gets better. But if I am trying too hard and not really contacting it just subtley trying to manipulate it it doesn't work.
I think the key is to not do anything and just let it be!
This is renunciation. This is letting go. It's a place of being, a way of being.
This might be helpful to you:
http://www.ajahnchah.org/book/On_Meditation1.php
and also this meditation series on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rd7a9Ur2x0o
Kind regards,
Dazzle
.
Ajahn Sumedho of the Thai Forest tradition often talks about letting go.
Some quotes here:
http://www.quotesstar.com/philosophy/religion/religious-leaders/ajahn-sumedho-quotes.html
I thought about it, and the difference between this experience and my usual meditation was the degree of the pain going to the surface.
It came in a way like "meeting with a father u dont see since u fight with him 10 years ago,now i see the pain but also a way out, i can reconciliate and finally go on"
While the usual is "i fight with a father 10 years ago, i sense some background pain,not sure if its because of that, i will let go of this sense of feeling and focus in my breath, but probably the pain will come back later"
Kinda dramatic but was something like that, that makes me wonder,
If u are not deeply identified,and it isnt hard to let go, are u really letting go something or just postponing?
Will try on meditation -_-
Second, I ask myself this question often too and I think in my case, I just sort of let some of my issues and behavior patterns, "slide" into the back of my mind but they aren't fully gone just yet. It seems it takes a lot of work to break old habits and conditioning and I've only just begun making a dent into the solid concrete block that is my psyche.