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What was change like for you.

I believe we all get to a point where we have had enough with ourselves, so we truly make a dedication for change. My course of action was buddhism i always loved the teachings and knew a lot, but didn't practice it. If only it was as easy reading about it and boom change. Well i now love that its not. My question to all is why did you change, what did you struggle with anxiety, self doubt, depression? I struggled with all these plus ocd, & its still there but not as strong. Last question what were some positive affirmations you used or tecniques that helped you believe in yourself more.

silverlobster

Comments

  • karastikarasti Breathing Minnesota Moderator

    I'm a control freak, and the one thing I couldn't control was my mind. I was lead around in life by the thoughts and feelings. I was always told "you are what you think" and sometimes my thoughts were pretty awful, which lead me to feel pretty awful. I learned better. Peace of mind was my entire reason for delving into Buddhism. It's done me well in that regard. And most others as well. My grandma used to tell me "You don't need to read all those books. Everything you ever need to know about what matters is already in you." Buddha knew that. I just had to be pointed the right way.

    lobsterupekka
  • EmmalouEmmalou Tx Explorer

    @karasti said:
    I'm a control freak, and the one thing I couldn't control was my mind. I was lead around in life by the thoughts and feelings. I was always told "you are what you think" and sometimes my thoughts were pretty awful, which lead me to feel pretty awful.

    This right here is what i struggle with. The inner a**hole lol. I was even listening to the dhamma the other day and it was talking about having bad thoughts automatically i went into self shame and guilt and that voice turned on saying yep your a bad person. Well i know its not true but it is a struggle keeping that inner voicr quiet, ive found that not feeding it more and letting it stay as it is, is helping, and feeding my good powerful positive thoughts more is really changing things for the better

  • ShoshinShoshin No one in particular Nowhere Special Veteran
    edited December 2016

    In a past life, I too suffered from anxiety, panic attacks, depression, suicidal thoughts (and attempts) ...You name it, my mind was determine to give me the experience of a life time...
    Change was slow, it was a gradual process, chipping away at the strong sense of self that was causing all the strife ...

    Doubt in the Dharma gradually gave way to faith in the Dharma, the more I started to see for my self, the easier it became to put the Dharma into practice, experiential understanding gradually started to replaced 'hearsay'...(developing this experiential understanding/knowledge is ongoing.... a work in progress)

    In a nutshell.....For me, it's all about the gradual letting go of the self.....and just going with the flow

    A positive affirmation...of sorts :)

    "If I change the way I look at things and the things I look at change!
    new neuropathways are created, my life starts to rearrange!"

    lobsterupekkasilver
  • lobsterlobster Veteran
    edited December 2016

    I used reframing, and a presentation package to continually reprogram my subconscious base and use of language ...
    This is my online version of the sort of thing - click the 'close' button top right in the calling page bar to get rid of it http://web.archive.org/web/20060209114806/http://pages.britishlibrary.net/lobster/exxo/relax2.htm

    This is now known as
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_reframing

    It is similar to yoga nidra, positive affirmations (download image versions and run as slideshow) and light trance work ...

    Eventually you will find the inner and outer voicing merging ...

    The 'rest' is easy or more correctly 'at ease' ...

  • Bravo @silver <3
    I am tempted to say 'Hi Ho Silver, away!'

    silverBuddhadragon
  • JeroenJeroen Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter Netherlands Veteran

    For me, I grew up in Osho's communes, and so no-mind, philosophy and the gauchhamis were standard fare. But I trained as an engineer and spent my callow twenties and thirties away from spirituality and in the corporate materialist world.

    It's only in the last few years that I have come back to spirituality. I chose Buddhism because it has much to teach about the mind and the emotions - in a way you become a gardener of your own mind and thoughts, pruning what is unhelpful and encouraging what is helpful.

    It has opened me up to some beautiful things, and enabled me to drop some bad habits. It has given me more insight into myself, taught me which emotions I need to cultivate and give more room to grow. Enlightenment seems far away as I learn to walk the path with ease and perhaps grace.

    lobsterupekkasilver
  • redappleredapple Veteran
    edited December 2016

    I still struggle with those things, I think we will for life. Buddhism isn't about eradicating the inevitable emotional and psychological suffering, but reacting to those states with wisdom, compassion, and a sense of calm clarity. I think it's all about learning to ride the waves, accepting the inevitability of suffering and knowing how to transform those waves into positive mental and emotional states, and accepting they will also arise and fall away again. Buddhism and Somatic Experiencing are the two things that have helped me gain a sense of command, aliveness, mastery and peace in regards to suffering. I guess it's all about learning to skilfully deal with suffering, use it as mud for the lotus flowers, and make peace with life as it is.

    It's all about learning to avoid the second arrow so to speak :).

    lobsterupekkasilver
  • For me, there wasn't a day that I decided to change things. There wasn't a discrete turning point. I have explored various religions, philosophies, outlooks on life. I still do. I still question. And hopefully I still change.

    Buddhadragon
  • Will_BakerWill_Baker Vermont Veteran

    I look at the question as being: "What Is change like for you?" For me, I believe change is inevitable and in many ways, it is beneficial to come to this understanding...

    lobsterupekka
  • @genkaku said:
    First -- and it flabbergasted me then -- "If they (all those holy men and holy women I rose so early to read about) can do it (attain a clear understanding), then so can I."
    Second -- I don't care what anyone else thinks and I don't want to convince anyone else. I just want to know for sure, for myself -- is spiritual life bullshit or not.

    B)
    Good plan/aspiration.
    Most of us as our real primary change, become aware that spiritual life is genuine - if we are.

    IMO it is the only life worth living, exploring and resonating with. There is only one person who needs to know that. Only one. Ourselves. That self we change as others have illustrated ...

    When you know spiritual life is not bullshit but possible, worthwhile and wonderful ... well ... that is a daily beginning ...

    Shoshinupekkasilver
  • Bravo @wojciech - very honest, very real. Stay grounded. Mantra is protective, healing, transformative, empowering etc.
    http://yinyana.tumblr.com/post/57234975984/buddhist-mantra-faqs
    <3

    wojciech
  • When life kicks you in the arse. Turn the other cheek (got that from the bible) ;)

    Kundo
  • EmmalouEmmalou Tx Explorer

    I guess i shouldve used a different word than change, because i understand we are always changing, but what i was meaning was what was the beginning of your journey of becoming more spiritual the time when you dedicated yourself daily to a practice and took things more seriously. This is a difficult thing deciding youre really in it no matter the kind of day you had. So really what keeps you on your path? What beauty have you found in yourself and what keeps you going even when you feel like you cant.

  • So really what keeps you on your path?

    Lack of death.

    Kundo
  • BexMBexM U.K. New

    Hello. For me, about 2006, I started to question my religion. Or religion/beliefs in general. I was not really brought up as anything. My mum was a spiritualist and for a while this interested me. But I've always had a problem with Gods; believing that is. I wouldn't go as far as to say I'm atheistic in my beliefs, but also not a believer (so some would say I am an atheist therefore). I started to read about Buddhism and the philosophy really appealed to me. I liked the fact there wasn't a deity to worship as such but even more, the 8FP and 4NT and the philosophy just made so much sense to me. Common sense way of living! So I have dabbled in and out through my life, but more now. I would say I am a Buddhist now whereas before I was just Buddhism-curious

  • karastikarasti Breathing Minnesota Moderator

    The fact that my practice "works" is what keeps me going. And I completely find it to be true that the more you don't want to do it (meditation, or whatever) or when you are too busy to do it, is when you most need to. You can't rely on it on the hard times in life if you don't practice it when things are easier. I have a small, local Sangha that I attend weekly and seeing them keeps me on track, as does regular contact with my teacher and his senior students even though they live 250 miles away.

    lobster
  • BuddhadragonBuddhadragon Ehipassiko & Carpe Diem Samsara Veteran

    @Emmalou said:
    So really what keeps you on your path? What beauty have you found in yourself and what keeps you going even when you feel like you cant.

    I feel it's a real privilege to find myself on this path: it has made me so strong and resilient.
    I see so many people whining in self-pity for lack of acceptance of life as it is.
    The beauty is in the path itself.
    Honestly, I never had a moment of doubt, never had a moment where I felt I "couldn't."
    In moments of despondency, as was the case when I suffered a stillbirth, I plunged deeply into the Scriptures to grapple with acceptance.
    I have never been disappointed.

    lobsterShoshin
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