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Good to know you came to that realization Nervy. Sometimes we look for external sources for our confusion and pain, when the truth is, the reasons for it, are right there, within you.
Agreed! I struggle often with guilt and find that when I'm not being mindful of my feelings, they manifest as resentment and irritation with others when in fact, I'm resentful and irritated with myself. Life and the people in my life have always been a great mirror for myself, and rather than use that beneficially (like recognizing the love and support around me, being mirrored from my Being) I get easily irritated with others' neediness, not recognizing that their neediness is mirroring my own.
So glad you got through it, nervvy! Congrats on your upcoming move out, too!
How was my day? Well I had a good day at work. Got lots done, had some interesting and useful lessons. Had the doors replaced upstairs in our house - yay we can now close the doors!!
However, came home feeling very, very tired and my heart is playing up; for those who don't know I have a serious heart condition, but manage to work fulltime by giving almost everything else up; so this will be another evening - like most of the weekend, when I can do very little apart from lie down, do some reading, watch some TV and try to accept my overall condition and the intensely irritating insect bites that I picked up sitting in the garden yesterday....I really want to clean the house, help cook dinner, do some yoga, and stay up beyond 8pm! More practice to do I guess!
How was my day? Well I had a good day at work. Got lots done, had some interesting and useful lessons. Had the doors replaced upstairs in our house - yay we can now close the doors!!
Congrats on the shiny, brand new, CLOSING doors. Sweet!
However, came home feeling very, very tired and my heart is playing up; for those who don't know I have a serious heart condition, but manage to work fulltime by giving almost everything else up
I'm sorry to hear about your condition. It has to be scary and hard to handle something that limits you in such a profound way. I don't know much about heart conditions, but I hope you'll be alright. You ARE gonna be alright, right? I hope so, very much.
You are very strong and brave to be able to function normally and hold a full time job under your circumstances. That's commendable and I admire you for it.
so this will be another evening - like most of the weekend, when I can do very little apart from lie down, do some reading, watch some TV and try to accept my overall condition and the intensely irritating insect bites that I picked up sitting in the garden yesterday
A little relaxation can be good right? Even if it's a bit "forced" upon you. And I hate mosquitoes because they love my blood and most times I am the only one who gets bit by them when I go out into the yard. Ugh. I guess it's my own fault for wearing shorts all the time. LoL.
Thanks Light! Although its not warm enough for mosquitoes, we have plenty of midges, and like you they go for me..
As for my heart condition, I have an ICD (implanted defibrillator) so I will survive a cardiac arrest if it happens. I just get very tired and have weird heart rhythms when I've overdone it - which I do most days at work -because I love my job and want to do my best! So yes, I will be fine and I'm really touched by your post.
Thanks Light! Although its not warm enough for mosquitoes, we have plenty of midges, and like you they go for me..
The curse of having sweet blood. LoL.
As for my heart condition, I have an ICD (implanted defibrillator) so I will survive a cardiac arrest if it happens. I just get very tired and have weird heart rhythms when I've overdone it - which I do most days at work -because I love my job and want to do my best! So yes, I will be fine and I'm really touched by your post.
Man, that IS very serious indeed. Is it healthy to exert so much effort at work given your situation? I dunno, just curious, cuz it sounds like you should be taking it easy to me! But then again, I don't know anything about the heart or medicine so don't mind me.
And how was your day?
My day has been normal so far. Got up and came here to check all the new posts. Now I'm gonna go talk to my family or drink some water, as I'm really thirsty.
My stomach has been hurting, but I can't go more into that without giving you all a case of raging TMI (Too Much Information). LoL.
My days are nearly exactly the same from one another. Given that I don't go out of the house almost at all.
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Barrasoto zenniewandering in a cloud in beautiful, bucolic Victoria BC, on the wacky left coast of CanadaVeteran
edited May 2010
I'm catching up to tell about my day on Friday. It was the last day of a 31/2 day sesshin (silent meditation retreat). It had been interesting and difficult, as these things always are. Pain had set in on day 2, but dissipated on day 3. At the end of the last sitting and walking meditations the night before, when the bell rang, in my mind I wanted to jump up and shout "hallelujah!". On Friday we on schedule (sitting, walking, lecture, work period, sitting, walking) until lunch time and then we broke silence and had a delicious lunch together. It was sunny that day and slightly warmer (14 degrees Celsius) and that made the morning easier. It was great to share conversation and laughs with the other retreat-ants.
That afternoon I delivered a document to a fellow member of the strata council (governing body) of my condominium building. He is someone that I have and have had strong differences of opinion with, but I have always maintained a friendly and respectful relationship with him and his wife. They invited me in for a visit. They live on the sunny (south) side of the building, and I have wanted to move to that side for some time - a bit tricky, because I would have to sell my apartment to buy the other one. I mentioned this to them, and when I got home I got a phone call from them to say that they are planning to move out and just starting the sale process! It looks like it should work out well for me.
So now I am very excited to be moving to a place where not only will I be in the sun, but on the 20th floor with a view of the ocean (Strait of Juan de Fuca) and the snow capped Olympic mountains in Washington State!
It looks like it should work out well for me.
So now I am very excited to be moving to a place where not only will I be in the sun, but on the 20th floor with a view of the ocean (Strait of Juan de Fuca) and the snow capped Olympic mountains in Washington State!
Seems the world is smiling down upon you. I'm always glad to hear about other people's good fortune.
Once a knat flew up to me and landed on my arm when I was younger and I said,
"Hello Mrs Knat, would you like a drink of my blood?" and she had a sip and flew away, and I felt happy.
Today was long. Long, long long! It was our 6th day of state testing and my 6th graders are just finding it tough to "keep it all together," although I was pleasantly surprised that 3rd period (who I had a 75 minute testing block with, then immediately my regular class period of 65 minutes) actually seemed to focus during the lesson. During their testing period I practiced trying to "be aware" in the quietness, and enjoy just being there.
One of my big challenges is that when I teach, there is SO MUCH going on that I haven't figured out yet how to be aware while also planning what I'm going to tell the class in the next five minutes, answering David's question, verifying if now is an appropriate time for Susie to use the restroom, and getting a pencil for Adrien- BUT WAIT, last time he broke my (mechanical) pencil so I'm not sure if I should lend him this one... Oh! This takes further thought, and oh look Debbie has an early-out and it's almost time for her to leave...
I'm drowning in thinking here and I don't know how to stop it!!!
Zachaa, keep up your amazing work with our children :-) I can't even imagine how hard it must be to deal with so much at once!!
I had a pretty rough day yesterday, but it turned out really well. I struggle a lot with patience. I've been struggling particularly with letting an ex go. I keep sending him messages to please talk to me. I need to just let him go and accept. I am trying to minimalize my reactivity. This is a great area to work on that.
I did turn the day around with some great reading and some meditation. Focused on an image of the ocean that I frequent in my meditations, and tried to imagine that each thought running through my head was just a wave coming in then going right back out. It was a great few minutes! I slept like a dream and forgave myself for being weak and impatient earlier in the day.
Jellybean- LOL! I guess it does sound a little off... but maybe it's just because I'm a woman and... you know... hehe. Anyway, our particular school is on block schedule and normally the periods are 86 minutes, but they have been shortened to add the testing block. Where are you?
TreeLuvr- Thanks for the reassurance. I'm a second year and they tell me that all of a sudden third year just pops and starts running real smoothly, but right now it's hard to find even a second to remember to be mindful through all that!
I'm sorry the beginning of the day was so rotten, I know how difficult it is to get over an ex. There's a good lesson in this, though- that even if it was at the very end you were able to turn the day around. Sometimes I get into these "funks" at the beginning of the day (especially after a rough morning meeting) and it's hard to shake so that it sours the rest of my day. At these times it's good to realize that NO, we CAN make a change and calm ourselves down, and it does not HAVE to ruin our whole entire day! Thanks for the reminder!
Wow! We are on block schedule so we do every other day. We have four periods a day, 86 minutes each, NO breaks, and a 35 minute lunch. This is just my crazy school, though; others are different. It's hard as a teacher to deal with lunch detentions, kids asking questions about their grade, AND eating lunch all at the same time in 35 minutes!
Today I tried again to focus on the task at hand, but it rapidly turned into multiple tasks and within about 30 seconds I wasn't aware anymore. Agh! It's just so hard to observe myself when my brain is so busy! I think maybe when I am more experienced it will go more smoothly and maybe I will have more time to sit back and observe myself, but right now it's all I can do just to keep up with the 37 kids in my class! Mindfulness in middle school is just not working for me right now! Any tips?
How old are the children you teach Zachaa? In primary school we got an hour and a quatre for lunch, and 30 mins for break LOL, not forgetting a 10 min last break. Each lesson was between 30 mins to 1 hour. The science teachers in my school are a bit strange because on our first day 2 science teachers ran into the room, laughed there heads off and legged it. Then our own limped out the door and appeared in the back of the room. I figured out how she appeared (doors) in the end LOL. Science in secondary (high) school is much better because get to make huge cells and look at stuff and mix chemicals and it's much more fun. Apart from when someone stained the expensive slip-proof fire-resisitent floor blue!
All the best
Jellybean
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federicaSeeker of the clear blue sky...Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubtModerator
edited May 2010
I just started my day with a glorious cup of Tibetan butter tea and tsampa!
What a lovely way to gear up for the morning!!
I just started my day with a glorious cup of Tibetan butter tea and tsampa!
What a lovely way to gear up for the morning!!
That does sound delightful!
I started my day with a pretty intense core workout, and some oatmeal and a banana. And three full glasses of water already before even being awake for three hours. I'm always pretty great in the morning, not always too great at carrying that through all day. Have some plans to meditate and read tonight, though. Then hopefully watch this week's LOST!
Spent this afternoon wondering how much longer I can keep this up; working full time I mean. I am so tired. Fortunately our lower sixth (16-17) go on study leave tomorrow; as do our fifths (15-16). We're also doing lots of practice papers so it means lots of marking. I'm hoping that the extreme fatigue (iit is worse than usual right now) is due to anemia - I get blood test results tomorrow...Essentially I have to work as I'm the main wage earner, we have a mortgage, other debts and a son at university who we're supporting. Five years til the mortgage and debts are paid off and Greg finishes uni next year. Light at the end of this tunnel. Mindfulness really helps. If I focus on the present I feel a lot better - any thing further seems impossible.
Our school (independent, UK) has nine 40 minute periods a day; twenty minutes break and then one hour and twenty for lunch. Lunch is mainly taken up with sports/extracurricular activities, workshops and individual students wanting help.
Anyway, nice evening ahead of watching the Madrid Masters (tennis - I'm an Andy Murray fan) and then a very early night! Hope you are all well!
Fran, do you exercise at all? I used to have major problems with fatigue, never tested positive for anemia like I'd thought I would, and always ate pretty healthy and avoided caffeine, couldn't figure out what was wrong! I started getting up earlier (and I do have the luxury of being able to go to bed earlier at night which you might not have) to work out for just 20 minutes before going to work - what an energy increase!! It was easy to make it a habit when I decided to focus on that benefit rather than any weight loss (which I've struggled with before) - the weight loss is just a nice side effect lol!
Unfortunately my heart condition and medication make it difficult to exercise. My cardiologist has said that I can do gentle exercise such as walking or yoga. I really enjoy yoga so I'm going to try and get back to it! Thanks for the suggestion!
No problem, I hope the yoga works :-) That must really be hard to deal with all those kids, a lack of energy, AND a heart condition - I'll be thinking of you and sending you good, strong thoughts!
i have been online a lot lately ,checking out dharma talks on line in the background, while doing domestic chores ,laundry ,cleaning house etc. tonight is new moon @9:04 i have decided to make this my starting point into buddhism ,i have registered for online dharma classes and am looking into finding a temple in my area. i will be moving from my place on july 1 st and i'm doing a lot of packing. this gives me a chance to get rid of a lot of STUFF .as i'm retired i have the chance to study CHEERS TO ALL
I started my day with a routine visit to my psychiatrist (I go every two months). The ride there and back was hellish cause it was so damn hot. Even the air conditioning didn't make it go away.
My medication remains the same it has been for a long time. We got all my pills on the way out of the hospital, so I don't have to worry about getting them wherever else. They always run out of them and they can be hard to get at other places.
I'm tired from skipping the last two hours of sleep to go to the appointment. But sadly, I wouldn't fall asleep if I tried right now, so no napping for me.
And about the lack of energy, I experience that as well, but my blood tests don't show anemia. It's most likely from the medication I take, but exercising didn't give me the famous energy boost most people claim to feel. It was mostly a huge chore for me to do. Unless it's weights, which I like more.
During lunch we hang around the field in my uk community secondery school, most of our activities are held after school. What did I do today? Well, I woke up at 07:10 and got dressed, brushed my teeth, packed my school bag, ate two slices of toast and a plum for breakfast, answered my e-mails, wrote more of my book and then got to school which officially starts at 08:55. We had French then functional maths followed by break where I hung around in the dinner hall, then we had history followed by RE and then for dinner I had pomodoro pasta and water and then hung out with my friend Xander. Then we had music then English then when school ended at 15:20 I attended wind band until 16:25. I took my allergy pill, fed my animals, and then went up to my grandparents'. I ate some vegetable soup and a mini-role and some biscuits, now I'm having mash, Yorkshire puddings, quorn meatballs, broccoli, carrots, gravy and mint-sauce followed by some ice-cream if I have time. Afterwards I'll go home, do some homework and then go on the computer before showering, brushing my teeth, doing press-ups, sit-ups, then meditating, then reading, then sleeping. And the same again the next day!
Yes, medication can make it very difficult; especially some of the psychiatric drugs. Two of my medicines are well known for causing fatigue.
It's funny isn't how I'm longing for some warmer weather in the UK and the heat is wiping you out in Ecuador! Hope your appointment went well and I'm glad that you got all your meds without any problems!
Jellybean - what a packed day! Half term soon though!
Yes, it is quite a packed day LOL It's pretty much the same day as usual, I have a scedual and I get irritated if something doesn't go to plan:eek: And it's half-term holiday in two weeks
AAARRGHHH!!!! Today was NOT FUN! My big success was that I didn't cry in front of the kids or yell my head off, but it was soooooo tempting. First we were on assembly schedule, which pushed lunch out to like 1pm, so I was STARVING and very grumpy, especially when the lunch detention girls were being disrespectful and at the same time I was trying to get things scheduled with my BTSA coach (for clearing my credential).
Then, there was seventh period, which is traditionally my worst class. They were very noisy and rowdy in the hallway walking to the assembly and I had to get the principal to calm them down. That was a bit degrading. Thankfully they calmed down after that and were respectful during the assembly and were sort of quiet afterwards back in class.
I would have liked to say that in those moments I was practicing mindfulness and loving-kindness, and viewing it as as my path, but honestly I was so busy trying to just get through it without losing my cool that Buddhism was pretty far from my mind. This has been my constant challenge.
Zachaa, we definitely understand how hard it is to maintain sometimes! When I worked as a social worker a few years ago, I'd constantly lose it and start crying in front of clients - NOT a good thing for your social worker to do!!
Keep your head up; today is another day!
I had a pretty good night last night. My ex husband came over to catch up and I cooked a new shrimp and sundried tomato pasta recipe. Kicked him out early and spent some time meditating, and then indulging in my vanity and trying on several skirts to find one that looks cute with my cowboy boots to head out with my sister tonight, haha!
Today I woke up around 07:10, got dressed, brushed my teeth, packed my bag, ate a breakfast of two slices of toast and chuna followed by a kiwi, answered my e-mails, wrote more of my book and went to school. I had art followed by maths followed by break followed by science followed by French. Then it was lunch so I had some pomodoro pasta and fairtrade orange juice and then I had IT followed by music. School finished at 15:20 and I went swimming with my friends Matty and Xander. At 17:10 I arrived back at my grandparents' and then I had a dinner of new potatoes, fish fingers, peas and broccoli along with a milkshake, two or three biscuits, two mini-roles and some ice-cream with strawberry sauce, :eek: Yes, I know, too much sugar Presently I'm watching Hollyoaks.
Last evening I went home, did three homeworks and went on the computer while watching modern family, leage of their own and then Glenn Martin DDS. At 22:00 I showered, brushed my teeth, did press-ups, sit-ups, meditated, read and went to sleep
I would have liked to say that in those moments I was practicing mindfulness and loving-kindness, and viewing it as as my path, but honestly I was so busy trying to just get through it without losing my cool that Buddhism was pretty far from my mind. This has been my constant challenge.
I know exactly what you mean. It seems that having a mindful disposition and practicing lovingkindness is all well and easy when we are sitting on the cushion, meditating. But on the times when life is testing us and bombarding us with endless stressful situations, it all seems to go out the window, and survival instincts set in.
It's not easy, but I'm trying to let myself make mistakes and just be happy about the times when I can think and be mindful before acting and WHILE acting. Which may not be many as of now, but I'm confident that will change in time.
It's not easy, but I'm trying to let myself make mistakes and just be happy about the times when I can think and be mindful before acting and WHILE acting. Which may not be many as of now, but I'm confident that will change in time.
But on the times when life is testing us and bombarding us with endless stressful situations, it all seems to go out the window, and survival instincts set in.
survival instincts sounds like something insurmountable.
perhaps call them for what they really are, old conditioning, which on top of being more accurate sounds a whole lot easier to deal with
I know exactly what you mean. It seems that having a mindful disposition and practicing lovingkindness is all well and easy when we are sitting on the cushion, meditating.
just keep at it, good job on your awesome efforts!!!
and perhaps remember that once you have dealt with these conditioning, it will be as difficult for you to react unskillfully like you are doing today, as it is for you to react peacefully today.
remember that once you have dealt with these conditioning, it will be as difficult for you to react unskillfully like you are doing today, as it is for you to react peacefully today.
This is a nice concept but it seems SO far off. To have my nature completely "reversed" and have a hard time acting unskillfully, sounds like a pipe dream to me.
This is a nice concept but it seems SO far off. To have my nature completely "reversed" and have a hard time acting unskillfully, sounds like a pipe dream to me.
Have more faith in yourself Santiago, my nature has been reversed numerous times in just the past ten years!
Eliminate the term "pipe dream" from your vocabulary. No such thing. A dream is a dream is a dream, and dreams aren't created to be obtained, they're created to give us focus! :thumbsup:
When ever I want something really bad and I dream for it, like how I dream that I will write a book, I always keep in mind that every great book, song, poem, piece of music, useful gadget or great piece of architecture, always started with a dream
OK, I just have to ask, what is chuna? Hopefully nothing like Vegemite! (***choke***gasp***)
League of their own? Is that the movie of which you speak? The team in that movie was a real softball team in my home town, Rockford, Illinois, though they were history by the time I stepped onto the stage. The Rockford Peaches I think they were called?
Wow, I would love it if I could have a hard time being unskillful! Wouldn't that be awesome!? And I love TreeLuvr's re-definition of "dream,' too. I'll have to remember that one.
Despite the fact that I got my layoff letter today, it was still a better day. I didn't cry although at times I felt like it. I've already started to make my peace with it. Thank goodness it's Friday, though!
And LOL about the "chuna"- made me laugh and I needed that right about now!
Well, if you want to come down again, just have some chuna and spread some Vegemite all over it! If you can keep that down, you're a better man (?) than I!
Despite the fact that I got my layoff letter today, it was still a better day. I didn't cry although at times I felt like it. I've already started to make my peace with it. Thank goodness it's Friday, though!
Man, that has to be hard to deal with. Good that you didn't let it get the best of you. Best of luck in finding a new job. But TGIF indeed!
And LOL about the "chuna"- made me laugh and I needed that right about now!
I lol'd too. I would have never guessed what it was without him explaining it. Hahaha, even if it was so obvious.
Comments
Agreed! I struggle often with guilt and find that when I'm not being mindful of my feelings, they manifest as resentment and irritation with others when in fact, I'm resentful and irritated with myself. Life and the people in my life have always been a great mirror for myself, and rather than use that beneficially (like recognizing the love and support around me, being mirrored from my Being) I get easily irritated with others' neediness, not recognizing that their neediness is mirroring my own.
So glad you got through it, nervvy! Congrats on your upcoming move out, too!
However, came home feeling very, very tired and my heart is playing up; for those who don't know I have a serious heart condition, but manage to work fulltime by giving almost everything else up; so this will be another evening - like most of the weekend, when I can do very little apart from lie down, do some reading, watch some TV and try to accept my overall condition and the intensely irritating insect bites that I picked up sitting in the garden yesterday....I really want to clean the house, help cook dinner, do some yoga, and stay up beyond 8pm! More practice to do I guess!
Congrats on the shiny, brand new, CLOSING doors. Sweet!
I'm sorry to hear about your condition. It has to be scary and hard to handle something that limits you in such a profound way. I don't know much about heart conditions, but I hope you'll be alright. You ARE gonna be alright, right? I hope so, very much.
You are very strong and brave to be able to function normally and hold a full time job under your circumstances. That's commendable and I admire you for it.
A little relaxation can be good right? Even if it's a bit "forced" upon you. And I hate mosquitoes because they love my blood and most times I am the only one who gets bit by them when I go out into the yard. Ugh. I guess it's my own fault for wearing shorts all the time. LoL.
Have a great rest of the day y'all!
As for my heart condition, I have an ICD (implanted defibrillator) so I will survive a cardiac arrest if it happens. I just get very tired and have weird heart rhythms when I've overdone it - which I do most days at work -because I love my job and want to do my best! So yes, I will be fine and I'm really touched by your post.
And how was your day?
with metta
Fran xx
The curse of having sweet blood. LoL.
Man, that IS very serious indeed. Is it healthy to exert so much effort at work given your situation? I dunno, just curious, cuz it sounds like you should be taking it easy to me! But then again, I don't know anything about the heart or medicine so don't mind me.
My day has been normal so far. Got up and came here to check all the new posts. Now I'm gonna go talk to my family or drink some water, as I'm really thirsty.
My stomach has been hurting, but I can't go more into that without giving you all a case of raging TMI (Too Much Information). LoL.
My days are nearly exactly the same from one another. Given that I don't go out of the house almost at all.
That afternoon I delivered a document to a fellow member of the strata council (governing body) of my condominium building. He is someone that I have and have had strong differences of opinion with, but I have always maintained a friendly and respectful relationship with him and his wife. They invited me in for a visit. They live on the sunny (south) side of the building, and I have wanted to move to that side for some time - a bit tricky, because I would have to sell my apartment to buy the other one. I mentioned this to them, and when I got home I got a phone call from them to say that they are planning to move out and just starting the sale process! It looks like it should work out well for me.
So now I am very excited to be moving to a place where not only will I be in the sun, but on the 20th floor with a view of the ocean (Strait of Juan de Fuca) and the snow capped Olympic mountains in Washington State!
Seems the world is smiling down upon you. I'm always glad to hear about other people's good fortune.
Glad your having a good life at the minute Barra.
Once a knat flew up to me and landed on my arm when I was younger and I said,
"Hello Mrs Knat, would you like a drink of my blood?" and she had a sip and flew away, and I felt happy.
The next day I had a swollen arm
All the best,
Jellybean
One of my big challenges is that when I teach, there is SO MUCH going on that I haven't figured out yet how to be aware while also planning what I'm going to tell the class in the next five minutes, answering David's question, verifying if now is an appropriate time for Susie to use the restroom, and getting a pencil for Adrien- BUT WAIT, last time he broke my (mechanical) pencil so I'm not sure if I should lend him this one... Oh! This takes further thought, and oh look Debbie has an early-out and it's almost time for her to leave...
I'm drowning in thinking here and I don't know how to stop it!!!
Anyway, that was my day.
All the best,
Jellybean
hahahaha
I had a pretty rough day yesterday, but it turned out really well. I struggle a lot with patience. I've been struggling particularly with letting an ex go. I keep sending him messages to please talk to me. I need to just let him go and accept. I am trying to minimalize my reactivity. This is a great area to work on that.
I did turn the day around with some great reading and some meditation. Focused on an image of the ocean that I frequent in my meditations, and tried to imagine that each thought running through my head was just a wave coming in then going right back out. It was a great few minutes! I slept like a dream and forgave myself for being weak and impatient earlier in the day.
TreeLuvr- Thanks for the reassurance. I'm a second year and they tell me that all of a sudden third year just pops and starts running real smoothly, but right now it's hard to find even a second to remember to be mindful through all that!
I'm sorry the beginning of the day was so rotten, I know how difficult it is to get over an ex.
At my college itsL
4 x 1 hour 30 minutes periods with
1 x 15 minute break AM
1 x 1 hour lunch break
1 x 15 minute break PM
Today I tried again to focus on the task at hand, but it rapidly turned into multiple tasks and within about 30 seconds I wasn't aware anymore. Agh! It's just so hard to observe myself when my brain is so busy! I think maybe when I am more experienced it will go more smoothly and maybe I will have more time to sit back and observe myself, but right now it's all I can do just to keep up with the 37 kids in my class! Mindfulness in middle school is just not working for me right now! Any tips?
All the best
Jellybean
What a lovely way to gear up for the morning!!
That does sound delightful!
I started my day with a pretty intense core workout, and some oatmeal and a banana. And three full glasses of water already before even being awake for three hours. I'm always pretty great in the morning, not always too great at carrying that through all day. Have some plans to meditate and read tonight, though. Then hopefully watch this week's LOST!
Our school (independent, UK) has nine 40 minute periods a day; twenty minutes break and then one hour and twenty for lunch. Lunch is mainly taken up with sports/extracurricular activities, workshops and individual students wanting help.
Anyway, nice evening ahead of watching the Madrid Masters (tennis - I'm an Andy Murray fan) and then a very early night! Hope you are all well!
My medication remains the same it has been for a long time. We got all my pills on the way out of the hospital, so I don't have to worry about getting them wherever else. They always run out of them and they can be hard to get at other places.
I'm tired from skipping the last two hours of sleep to go to the appointment. But sadly, I wouldn't fall asleep if I tried right now, so no napping for me.
And about the lack of energy, I experience that as well, but my blood tests don't show anemia. It's most likely from the medication I take, but exercising didn't give me the famous energy boost most people claim to feel. It was mostly a huge chore for me to do. Unless it's weights, which I like more.
All the best
Jellybean
Yes, medication can make it very difficult; especially some of the psychiatric drugs. Two of my medicines are well known for causing fatigue.
It's funny isn't how I'm longing for some warmer weather in the UK and the heat is wiping you out in Ecuador! Hope your appointment went well and I'm glad that you got all your meds without any problems!
Jellybean - what a packed day! Half term soon though!
Then, there was seventh period, which is traditionally my worst class. They were very noisy and rowdy in the hallway walking to the assembly and I had to get the principal to calm them down. That was a bit degrading. Thankfully they calmed down after that and were respectful during the assembly and were sort of quiet afterwards back in class.
I would have liked to say that in those moments I was practicing mindfulness and loving-kindness, and viewing it as as my path, but honestly I was so busy trying to just get through it without losing my cool that Buddhism was pretty far from my mind. This has been my constant challenge.
Keep your head up; today is another day!
I had a pretty good night last night. My ex husband came over to catch up and I cooked a new shrimp and sundried tomato pasta recipe. Kicked him out early and spent some time meditating, and then indulging in my vanity and trying on several skirts to find one that looks cute with my cowboy boots to head out with my sister tonight, haha!
Today I woke up around 07:10, got dressed, brushed my teeth, packed my bag, ate a breakfast of two slices of toast and chuna followed by a kiwi, answered my e-mails, wrote more of my book and went to school. I had art followed by maths followed by break followed by science followed by French. Then it was lunch so I had some pomodoro pasta and fairtrade orange juice and then I had IT followed by music. School finished at 15:20 and I went swimming with my friends Matty and Xander. At 17:10 I arrived back at my grandparents' and then I had a dinner of new potatoes, fish fingers, peas and broccoli along with a milkshake, two or three biscuits, two mini-roles and some ice-cream with strawberry sauce, :eek: Yes, I know, too much sugar
Last evening I went home, did three homeworks and went on the computer while watching modern family, leage of their own and then Glenn Martin DDS. At 22:00 I showered, brushed my teeth, did press-ups, sit-ups, meditated, read and went to sleep
All the best,
Jellybean
I know exactly what you mean. It seems that having a mindful disposition and practicing lovingkindness is all well and easy when we are sitting on the cushion, meditating. But on the times when life is testing us and bombarding us with endless stressful situations, it all seems to go out the window, and survival instincts set in.
It's not easy, but I'm trying to let myself make mistakes and just be happy about the times when I can think and be mindful before acting and WHILE acting. Which may not be many as of now, but I'm confident that will change in time.
TRUTH!! Have a good weekend lightwithin!!
perhaps call them for what they really are, old conditioning, which on top of being more accurate sounds a whole lot easier to deal with
just keep at it, good job on your awesome efforts!!!
and perhaps remember that once you have dealt with these conditioning, it will be as difficult for you to react unskillfully like you are doing today, as it is for you to react peacefully today.
This is a nice concept but it seems SO far off. To have my nature completely "reversed" and have a hard time acting unskillfully, sounds like a pipe dream to me.
Have more faith in yourself Santiago, my nature has been reversed numerous times in just the past ten years!
Eliminate the term "pipe dream" from your vocabulary. No such thing. A dream is a dream is a dream, and dreams aren't created to be obtained, they're created to give us focus! :thumbsup:
This is something I need to work on. I'm always putting myself down and I'm not self-compassionate at all.
Wow, that sounded very nice, I liked that. You have a lot of wisdom in you that seems to flow out so easily. Good for you and thanks for the support.
All the best,
Jellybean
OK, I just have to ask, what is chuna? Hopefully nothing like Vegemite! (***choke***gasp***)
League of their own? Is that the movie of which you speak? The team in that movie was a real softball team in my home town, Rockford, Illinois, though they were history by the time I stepped onto the stage. The Rockford Peaches I think they were called?
Palzang
Palzang
Despite the fact that I got my layoff letter today, it was still a better day. I didn't cry although at times I felt like it. I've already started to make my peace with it. Thank goodness it's Friday, though!
And LOL about the "chuna"- made me laugh and I needed that right about now!
Palzang
Man, that has to be hard to deal with. Good that you didn't let it get the best of you. Best of luck in finding a new job. But TGIF indeed!
I lol'd too. I would have never guessed what it was without him explaining it. Hahaha, even if it was so obvious.