If you would like to make progress but are not sure what to do next

banned_crab

“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment.” - Ekhart Tolle

NextElement

I've been having trouble with meditation. I have a cold, so obviously that makes it hard to focus on breathing (or even breathe normally), and my mind keeps wandering.... Kind of disheartening after like 2 days now. All I can do is keep trying I guess!

Chaz

A wandering mind is pretty normal. Have you talked with meditaion teacher about it?

NextElement

Chaz said:

A wandering mind is pretty normal. Have you talked with meditaion teacher about it?

Not many meditation teachers in my area... Rural midwest United States.

Jeffrey

Be kind to yourself while at the same time know that there are possibilities opening (and closing) at all times. It sure is hard to meditate with a cold. That's why I personally follow a meditation of taking all things as path. If I have a cold then I just sit there with the bad feeling. I know deep down that whatever comes my way I can stay with refuge to the dharma. I don't know if this will reassure you or the opposite, but I have been meditating for 14 years and 6.5 of those with a Lama. As you saw in a couple days ago in my thread I still have problems with losing myself in thoughts. I will think of you in the future when I dedicate merit, @NextElement.

NextElement

Thank you very much, @Jeffrey ! Let me get this straight: I should just sit there and kind of embrace the cold Im feeling? Because since I'm feeling the cold it means I'm alive, and it's just another form of suffering in this life?

Chaz

NextElement said:

Thank you very much, @Jeffrey ! Let me get this straight: I should just sit there and kind of embrace the cold Im feeling? Because since I'm feeling the cold it means I'm alive, and it's just another form of suffering in this life?

Just another thought. Let it go and return to your breath.

Jeffrey

The cold is just your body and feelings of "I don't want this". Those are just passing. In a week you could be back to normal. You want to feel better and that is normal. But the internal monologue says "I can't deal with this one more moment". Your right that it means your alive. But the monologue of "I hate this" is just exasperation you are feeling. Like us in the midwest are getting tired of snow (I am from Michigan). I say to myself every day almost "go away snow". So I try to have a little sense of humor about the whole winter thing. Sense of humor goes a long way.

Suffering when transformed with Buddhist practice is just a sensitivity with energies you are feeling. I am not always in touch with that. But like I said I take refuge. You are welcome in this online community if you enjoy sharing with other Buddhist afficianados.

We cannot fix hot or cold. (aside from central heating and air haha). But we can let a breath of fresh air in every so often. Meditation perhaps results in a better feeling, but our 5 skhandas are fickle and we will never ever always have them our way. This is why they say craving produces suffering. Craving a well feeling. I have felt flu and so forth since I am practicing and I just sit with it. I think it works.

fivebells

@NextElement, it's fine to admit that having a cold is an unpleasant experience, take whatever steps you can to mitigate it, etc.

Instructions like Jeffrey's and Tolle's are sometimes useful for fostering equanimity about the things you can't change. Along the same lines, it's also useful to study any aversion you experience, with an eye to uprooting it.

It's also useful, particularly when your breath is messed up, to play with your perceptions of the breath and the discomfort, to find perceptions which comfort and calm you.

pegembara

NextElement said:

I've been having trouble with meditation. I have a cold, so obviously that makes it hard to focus on breathing (or even breathe normally), and my mind keeps wandering.... Kind of disheartening after like 2 days now. All I can do is keep trying I guess!

Being aware is what Buddhist meditation is about. As long as you noticed trouble with meditation, having a cold, difficulty focussing, wandering mind, feeling disheartened, having doubt etc. you are doing fine. It is about being aware of what is happening in the moment.

“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment.” - Ekhart Tolle

"All you need to do is keep your sense of simple awareness solid and strong, and nothing will be able to overwhelm you."
"Stay with awareness itself at all times — except when you sleep. The minute you wake up, stay right at awareness, and it won't be long before discernment arises."
"To be aware means to be aware as soon as defilement arises, to see defilement and not act under its power."

When you practice mindfulness, if you keep practicing for long time diligently, you will come to the point that you know that you know. You know that you are seeing, you know that you are hearing, you know that you are talking.
~ Sayadaw U Jotika~

Jeffrey

I agree to study the experience. But not with monkey mind. Let your mind be unknowing which is how dharmakaya manifests. Then something practical comes out of that which we can call nirmanaka. These are bodies of Buddha, but they are manifest in our lives. They are qualities of mind if you will. The samboghakaya is the energy that connects the unknowing dharmaka to the practical nirmanakaya. It is that good feeling you get when your awareness cheers up and says to itself "yes yes I understand that,,, Eureka".

But all of that is always changing. You learn to have confidence and a light heart, but there will always be things throwing you off of your balance. So you can take your rug out from you in meditation on the three marks or alternatively you can just let samsara kick the rug out from you by the losing your beloved objects.

fivebells

I thought Buddhist meditation was about ending suffering.

Jeffrey

Letting go of suffering ends it. It is still there but no monkey mind and thus it turns into just sensitivity. Suffering becomes sensitivity. Aversion becomes a creative no. All of the energy of aversion is turned into a clear no towards something and seeing the object of suffering to have no permanent nature.

something like that bahh I'm not going to pretend much longer that I know what the truth is

NextElement

Okay, I'll admit it: I think my main problem is that I have no clue what I'm doing when it comes to meditation! Normally, I try to sit in the traditional position against my bed. Then I'll focus on my breathing and count my breaths in sets of ten. I just do that until I'm relaxed, and then I let my mind concentrate on one thought related to Buddhas teachings, etc.

But I have to admit, my best meditation experience happened when I was listening to Tibetan monk chants. I went into this really deep state, opened my eyes and looked around and felt totally happy just to be sitting there where I was in the universe. It was like 15 seconds of pure joy, but I haven't been able to replicate that feeling since. Perhaps because I'm desiring that feeling again?

Jeffrey

Yeah I think you should just let feelings come and not have such a high expectation.

Also if you can find a teacher by e-mail then you can receive a method from them and let them know all of these things you are saying.

I have had peak experiences but like you I cannot control them. Otherwise why would I do anything else but meditate. However in the last 2 months I have meditated a LOT. It is not peak experiences, but I just have no apprehension to meditate. And it feels like I have gotten to a point where I 'Just Do It TM nike' And I am just detached curiousity whether it will satisfy my little hopes.

fivebells

NextElement said:

Okay, I'll admit it: I think my main problem is that I have no clue what I'm doing when it comes to meditation!

Since you have a cold, you might experiment with the instructions given in Using Meditation to Deal with Pain, Illness & Death. (Substitute "discomfort" for "pain" if you're not in pain.)

Another technique is to breathe through the pain. If you can become sensitive to the breath sensations that course through the body each time you breathe, you will notice that you tend to build a tense shell around the pain, where the energy in the body doesn't flow freely. This, although it's a kind of avoidance technique, actually increases the pain. So think of the breath flowing right through the pain as you breathe in and out, to dissolve away this shell of tension. In most cases, you will find that this can relieve the pain considerably. However, there are some people though who find that breathing through the pain increases the pain, which is a sign that they are focusing improperly. The solution in that case is to focus on the opposite side of the body. In other words, if the pain is in the right side, focus on the left. If it's in front, focus on the back. If it's in your head — literally — focus on your hands and feet.

lobster

fivebells said:

I thought Buddhist meditation was about ending suffering.

. . . just when I was enjoying the fruits of practice . . .
http://www.heartspace.org/writings/traditional/TenBhumis.html

[muffled scream from Mr Cushion]
If I do not go to the hell to help the suffering beings there, who else will go? ... if the hells are not empty I will not become a Buddha. Only when all living beings have been saved, will I attain Bodhi.
vow of Ksitigarbha
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ksitigarbha

As far as I know distress/dukkha is part of existence (think I read that somewhere). However as @fivebells mentions it can be transcended and welcome.
What'snot to luv?

. . . some teachings can seem a little advanced but many practitioners do reside in Purelands, higher states of well being whilst being in difficulties . . .

Why are there three jewels? Because the sangha can inspire our potential, the dharma inform us and the Buddhas beckon us . . .

Zayl

Huh, that was actually surprisingly helpful.

Everything will be alright, because everything is.

karasti

For me at this point, recognizing when I'm not "there" and bringing myself back is what my meditation is mainly about. Breathing in is mostly just waiting, if thoughts arise, I let go of them and let them dissolve when I breathe out. Rinse, repeat. Sometimes I find myself following a thought, and then i stop myself, quickly and from a distance check my posture and go back to my breathing. It works quite well. I've tried visualizations, chants/mantras, counting, all sorts of things and so far, this works the best. It was a technique taught by Lama Tony Duff who was a student of Chogyam Trungpa but I'm not sure if it 100% matches what CTR taught, or not. I also make a point to not necessarily adjust or address every single sensation. if my sock gets crooked, I don't necessarily fix it right away. Not really actively resisting fixing it, but checking whether it truly needs to be fixed. It seems to help me in daily life with recognizing when something really needs to be addressed and when it's a sensation that can be noted and let go of.