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Alone or Together?
Hi all,
In your own personal experience, has it been better for you to practice Buddhism on your own (via reading books and things online without having any personal guru or teacher, etc.), or is having a teacher and/or being a part of a monastery or Buddhist group more beneficial to your personal practice?
I am just curious. I have been practicing on my own for the past couple of months, however, I am thinking about attending a local monastery to help further my practice and experience with Buddhism.
Thanks!
In your own personal experience, has it been better for you to practice Buddhism on your own (via reading books and things online without having any personal guru or teacher, etc.), or is having a teacher and/or being a part of a monastery or Buddhist group more beneficial to your personal practice?
I am just curious. I have been practicing on my own for the past couple of months, however, I am thinking about attending a local monastery to help further my practice and experience with Buddhism.
Thanks!
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Comments
The Sangha Jewel is imo vital in this era.
Reading..even the Suttas/Sutras, will only take us so far.. The Suttas are records of thoughts written in a language now extinct in a age of the world now completely remote from our times...there is no standard translation and all of the translations are more or less inadequate.
At the other extreme are people will tell you that all you have to do is sit and pay attention and by some kind of magic your real nature will reveal itself.
Trouble is if that happens at all its rare.
Most people just end up going round in circles and writing endlessly about it, or giving up completely.
Teachers are vital imo. They need not be full-blown Vajrayana Gurus, ( although if you find yourself drawn to that way...explore it ) they might just just be people who have learned a bit more than us from people who knew a bit more than them...
But in many years involved with all this, all the people that strike me as knowing what they are talking about have had teachers..Even those who claim that teachers are not needed if they are actually still practicing turn out to have had teachers in the past...
Keep your eyes open for sharpsters and quacks..do not have unrealistic expectations of mystics walking on water... but seek out solid, real, teachers.
so what has benefited me is an online Sangha/monastics on Second Life and also the internet(Bhikkhu Bodi, Ajahn Brahm, Bhante G, etc.. dhammatube channel on youtube is awesome :P).. these monastics on the internet were my first teachers as it were, and they continue to be along with Bhante G and Bhante Seelananda when I can make the 5 hour trip.
I see a strong benefit to doing the practice on your own.. if you have the wisdom to be able to guide yourself towards what is skillful and beneficial, but I also see the benefit of dhamma brothers and sisters. That being said I have an attachment to being by myself in the woods and seem to meditate better that way.
In the end we know that they can only offer some guidance.. we have to put in the work and make the decisions that lead to our own liberation.. so we really are alone the whole time.
But I'm also super judgemental and didn't like the look of the people there. This one chick had one of those t-shirts where it's the symbols of all the religions spelling out peace or some shit and I was just like, gimme a break. And there was this hippie dude wearing those pants that look like pajamas and he had these dreadlocks and I hate dreadlocks because they're so unhygienic... There was a super nice Australian guy though. He was cool.
Anyway, I kinda like going it alone, at least for now. I get to study on my own time and I don't have to go out in the cold.
The danger of practicing with a group is laziness.
Since there are dangers no matter what the venue, I suppose the best anyone can do is keep on practicing.
The issue is not simply alone or in a group. The issue is instruction which is from person to person and not from books.
Which is how Buddhadharma has been taught for 2500 years. And what keeps it alive.
Where theres a will......
also @citta .. you wouldn't happen to be Cittasanto on Dhammawheel would you?
I was the founding head of an eclectic tradition coven for a few years, and even threw a successful public gathering once, which is impressive because it was done in an area not known for religious 'diversity' and acceptance. Yet, it went really well!
About 98% of my experiences with all these kinds of groups and gatherings were positive, and fun learning experiences.
But then I got burned... and burned badly; by my very own group that I started.
It was heartbreaking and devastating for me. Took me a long, long time to get over it - for the most part.
What I am left with is a strong aversion to all manner of organized groups and/or gatherings. I would love to go to a Buddhist temple for the experience, but I don't think I'd ever get involved with a study group, sangha, or anything like that again.
It's difficult anyhow, because the only 2 or 3 sanghas or temples in NJ are hours away from where I am ...
I'd like to go to a temple just for the experience of going to a temple. My aversion to groups doesn't keep me from doing that... my aversion to traveling in a car for hours does!
I'm sure plenty of people judged me when I showed up at the clinic this morning in my sweat pants, dearfoam slippers and a flannel shirt. But if they don't like it, they could come over and try to get my jeans over my canteloupe sized knee and my feet into shoes when I couldn't bend over, lol. You just never know what someone is going through when you judge them
@MaryAnne -- I hear you, sister.
Although I don't know your tradition or practice, I would vouch for the experience of sitting silently with a group. Something happens, but what that 'something' is doesn't open itself to frothy conversation, Buddhist or otherwise. Not that it's some kind of Magical Mystery Tour or something, but it is worth the time. The first time I walked into a meditation hall full of silent people, it scared the crap out of me. But I also knew something true was going on ... at least for my purposes. So I hung around a bit more and the initial scaries turned out to be not so scary ... there were other scaries that had much more meat on the bone.
right now I'm trying to figure out a place for us to gather and meditate indoors, since I'm the only silly person who probably meditates out in the cold. I'm gonna apply to use a room in the OC Library maybe.
Some people don't like the way I view people. That's cool with me. Frankly, I'm not going to start up a conversation with dreadlock man or dumb tshirt girl because I know I have nothing to say to either of them. The nice Australian guy? His clothes didn't look expensive or flashy, but they fit him well and they were clean and pressed. He has enough self awareness to be appropriate in society. He's not so narcissistic that he requires a hairdo or style of clothing that screams "look at me! Pay attention to me".
Because that's what I see when I see weird clothes and weird hair. I see an expression of their own narcissism and a childish need for attention. When they say they are expressing themselves, I couldn't agree more.
And I say this as someone who once had a shaved head and a Mohawk and every color of the rainbow hair. I say this as someone who associated solely with people with wild clothes, political t-shirts and dreadlocks for years. Thankfully, I grew out of it, but not everyone does.
All signed up!
That it would
I have also been profoudly greatful for the contributions both provided to teach me this.
Ah... so true! You probably can't find a more outrageous and goofy looking group than a group of hard core pagans of various traditions gathered for rituals or festivals-
everything from rainbow hair, mohawks, body piercings and modifications, tattoos, head-to-toe tie-dye clothing, (tie dye NEVER goes out of style with pagans! LOL), string bikini tops with jeans and thigh high leather boots, vegan friendly organic robes and gauzy style peasant dresses, togas and togs, kilts and saris, etc. You'll see both men and women wearing tons of make-up or body paint, and others who insist on being scrubbed clean head to toe. You'll see men with beards down to their navels and some with dreads, and men shaved bald everywhere. (and I mean everywhere).
You'll see men wearing skirts, and mumus, too. Nakedness is also common when it's a clothing optional event.
From the outside looking in, it's all outrageous and outside the box of society's conventional looks.
But from the inside, one will find some of the most intelligent young, middle aged and old university professors, lawyers, bankers, writers, artists, musicians, teachers, etc, one can imagine amongst the most outrageous looking. Not saying there are no goofball batshit crazy types... because there are, just as there are in ANY group - no matter what the common thread may be for that group.
A person with dirty or smelly dreads is a person who would probably be dirty and smelly without dreads. Don't blame the dreads. :-)
Dreads can be and should be washed 1-3 times a week. They even make special shampoos for dread hair that rinses squeaky clean, leaving no residue. Probably better than the shampoos most of us commonly use.
There are many myths about dreadlocks and those that wear them. The majority of those myths originally stem from racism due to the color of dreadlocks wearing people's skin, which is almost always brown to black....
http://www.howtodread.com/dreadlock.html
If you can sit on a bus or hold the rail on an escalator then a few dreadlocks should not be a problem for you.
So gross.