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I am really interested in taking refuge vows. I've been very interested n Buddhism for quite sometime and over the past 2 years, I have read many books on the topic, practiced meditation, and have attended classes at my local Shambahala Center and attended a meditation retreat. There is an Acharya coming to my town to give Refuge Vows in about 4 weeks. He was here last summer but I knew I wasn't ready at that time. Anyway, my boyfriend, who has already taken refuge vows years ago, (and already taken Bodhsittva vows already as well) is kind of making me feel like I'm second guessing myself about it.i think he wants me to realize that taking these vows are no joke and that by taking refuge vows, I'm declaring that I'm a Buddhist and that I'm now taking refuge in xyz. I think he feels that I should practice being a Buddhist more and practice living a Buddhist life FIRST before I take the vows. He doesn't think that taking the vows without already seriously practicing isn't suddenly gonna make me super Buddhist by just simply taking the vows. While I understand this concept, for some reason I just want him to be happy for me and let me have my own path. He feels that before he took his vows that no one really took the time to explain to him what refuge vows meant so he doesn't want me to go into this uninformed and blindsided as he was. In the process of him being "helpful", I feel judged and discouraged. No I don't meditate everyday, yes I have a glass of wine sometimes and no im not perfect. I still want to be a Buddhist though. What are your thoughts? Try living like a Buddhist first and then take the vows? Or take the vows and begin my path. I don't know what to do. Now I'm just pissed off to be honest and crying and now I don't want to take the vows. I don't know what to do. I appreciate how seriously my boyfriend takes this. But now I just don't feel like I should take the vows. Help.