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Disease Control - Critical News

edited January 2006 in General Banter
The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent
strain of Sexually Transmitted Disease. The disease is contracted through
dangerous and high-risk behavior. The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim
and pronounced "gonna re-elect him." Many victims contracted it in 2004,
after having been screwed for the past four years. Cognitive characteristics of
individuals infected include: anti-social personality disorders,
delusions of grandeur with messianic overtones, extreme cognitive dissonance,
inability to incorporate new information, pronounced xenophobia and
paranoia, inability to accept responsibility for own actions, cowardice
masked by misplaced bravado, uncontrolled facial smirking, ignorance of
geography and history, tendencies towards evangelical theocracy,
categorical all-or-nothing behavior. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at
how this destructive disease originated only a few years ago from a bush
found in Texas.

Comments

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited January 2006
    Miaow....!

    Loved it... copied it... posted it elsewhere...
    Brilliant!:bowdown:
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    Excellent.

    I've heard there is a pc version of this too. The only commands that will work on your pc are:

    C:<enter> # # #

    -bf
  • edited January 2006
    buddhafoot wrote:

    I've heard there is a pc version of this too. The only commands that will work on your pc are:

    C:<enter> # # #

    -bf

    I don't get it. :scratch:
  • edited January 2006
    :bigclap:
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    We'll see if anyone else does.

    It's an old programming joke and you have to be familiar with DOS.

    That's all I'm gonna say.

    -bf
  • edited January 2006
    Whatever...why don't you go make some more helmets for cats out of lime peels.
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    YogaMama wrote:
    Whatever...why don't you go make some more helmets for cats out of lime peels.

    I'm sending you big, fluffy clouds of good thoughts and loving kindness, my dharma-sister.

    -bf

    or maybe that was just gas... but I'm sending them all your way cuz I really like ya!
  • SabineSabine Veteran
    edited January 2006
    buddhafoot wrote:
    I'm sending you big, fluffy clouds of good thoughts and loving kindness, my dharma-sister.

    -bf

    or maybe that was just gas... but I'm sending them all your way cuz I really like ya!

    lmao, gross! :crazy:
    Hmmm...I need to brush up on my nerdy stuff. I've seen that programming joke somewhere, but it was a loooong time ago. :(
  • edited January 2006
    I still don't get it. :type:
  • edited January 2006
    The only nerdy joke I know is :

    "There are 10 types of people that understand binary.

    Those that do and those that don't!"

    fnerr fnerr fnerr! (nerdy laugh)
  • keithgkeithg Explorer
    edited January 2006
    buddhafoot wrote:
    Excellent.

    I've heard there is a pc version of this too. The only commands that will work on your pc are:

    C:<enter> # # #

    -bf
    I had to think about that for a while. :lol: I am not familiar with DOS but I use linux..
  • edited January 2006
    buddhafoot wrote:
    I'm sending you big, fluffy clouds of good thoughts and loving kindness, my dharma-sister.

    -bf

    or maybe that was just gas... but I'm sending them all your way cuz I really like ya!

    I'll have to tell my husband it was you...last night, I kept blaming him for smelling like sulphur!
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    Frizzer wrote:
    The only nerdy joke I know is :

    "There are 10 types of people that understand binary.

    Those that do and those that don't!"

    fnerr fnerr fnerr! (nerdy laugh)

    Good one.

    -bf
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    keithg wrote:
    I had to think about that for a while. :lol: I am not familiar with DOS but I use linux..

    It's kind of sick - which is why I haven't gone into any explanation.

    -bf
  • edited January 2006
    That's never held you back before, bf!
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    But now I'm practicing "Right Humor" - so I'm a work in process...

    Maybe you could start practicing "Right I'm-Not-Going-To-Be-So-Dang-Cranky-All-The-Time-And-Try-To-Be-A-Little-Nicer" sometime in the near future.

    Hmm?

    Maybe?

    Yes?

    -bf
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited January 2006
    Miaow....
  • edited January 2006
    LOL!!! Awww...I'm really not that cranky at all actually! :) I am just sassy when I reply to your posts.

    Bf - You are such a nice, wonderful person and I send you lots of wonderful thoughts! You are just so smart and funny!

    Is that better, Mr. I-Send-You-Lots-of-Smelly-Gas-Clouds???????
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    I know, stinker and I like you too.

    And you don't need to blow smoke up my... well, um... you know what I mean. :) You should have just said the truth:

    Bf - You are such a mediocre, mundane person and I send you lots of wonderful thoughts. You are just so able to add 2+2 and barely entertaining!

    :)

    -bf
  • keithgkeithg Explorer
    edited January 2006
    I think its time you guys kiss and make up. :lol:
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    keithg wrote:
    I think its time you guys kiss and make up. :lol:

    No need. I think Yoda and I are good to go.

    Are we good to go, Yoda?

    -bf
  • XraymanXrayman Veteran
    edited January 2006
    hey I like the binary joke-I get that, the rest? well whatever

    sad thing is I use Unix, Linux, Dos and YUK windows but it still makes no sense-sorry
  • edited January 2006
    bf - yep, we're good. :)
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    Xrayman wrote:
    hey I like the binary joke-I get that, the rest? well whatever

    sad thing is I use Unix, Linux, Dos and YUK windows but it still makes no sense-sorry


    Anyone that still uses Unix is good in my book.

    -bf
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited January 2006
    Oh, sheeeesh!! Gimme a biro any day!
    Better still; I'm gonna stick to my nice, thick, chunky, fluorescent crayons....!!:crazy: :D :hiding:
  • edited January 2006
    The pooter jokes are so over my head but that's cos my pooter is so old and slow that I don't get a voice saying "You have mail" - a wee man runs in with a stick in his hand! Or the carrier pigeon knocks on the windows

    KNOCKS ON THE WINDOWS????? Gettit?
  • MagwangMagwang Veteran
    edited January 2006
    buddhafoot wrote:
    Excellent.

    I've heard there is a pc version of this too. The only commands that will work on your pc are:

    C:<enter> # # #

    -bf
    YogaMama wrote:
    I don't get it. :scratch:
    buddhafoot wrote:
    We'll see if anyone else does.

    It's an old programming joke and you have to be familiar with DOS.

    That's all I'm gonna say.

    -bf


    C:<enter> # # #

    See colon. Enter. Pound, pound, pound.

    *SHEESH* That's an old one. :rolleyesc


    ...
  • edited January 2006
    Oh, do you guys call a # a pound then?
    We call them a "hash", £ - that's what we call a pound over here.

    That explains why I didn't get it.
    "See colon. Enter. Hash hash hash" doesn't have the same ring to it !
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited January 2006
    Unless you're Rastafarian... ya mon.

    -bf
  • BrigidBrigid Veteran
    edited January 2006
    LOL!
  • edited January 2006
    Word of advice - be very suspicious when offered Corned Beef Hash by a hippy!
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