Help me out please!

lyndall

Well where do i begin,i decided to go to the sister in laws church(evangelistic)she invited me along because they had a guest speaker Pastor from australia Vince Esterman talking on how not to worry about the future.Wrong move i think i made, the speech wasn't to bad apart from not getting to the point which was ultimately you have to sign your name to god as it is the only insurance policy so as to not worry about all your personal,finacial social problems etc.etc. He then proceded to single myslef and another lady out as having bricks in our handbags!,he couldn't quite work which one of us it was,the other lady denied having any problems(later i found out by my sisters husband who wasn't there that this lady has been to their church and has alot of problems as he puts it),He said god told him a lady was coming today!,so then he turned his attention to me asking if i had anything in my past, i said yes well hasn't everyone got problems and trouble in their lives?,he then put his hand on my shoulder and prayed for me with the sister in law speaking in tongues,wierd as i tell you,there was another lady behind me i think they wanted to do a Beny Hinn on me but nothing happened,he seemed a bit dissapointed i felt and then turned away from me as if to want nothing to do with me any more,i was looking for some discussion on "yes we all have had things go wrong in our lives and your point is?",but didn't get that far.My sister in laws daughter was there as well which i didn't think would come as she lives far away,but i was hoping to see her to convey my sympathy and understanding as her marriage is breaking up at this moment so at least i got to see her if nothing else.

I am feeling quite sad and unhappy and like iv'e been in a fight with Mike Tyson at the moment don't know why,whether it's my sister in laws daughters situation or the fact this man invaded my personal boundaries?,any thoughts on the feelings of what i am experiencing anybody?.

milkmoth

"Your first reaction is usually the correct one."

DhammaDhatu

avoidance is best

SherabDorje

I''ll bet you won't do that again...

Thao

what a setup. and i imagine that is what is bothering you most. the setup was to invade your boundaries and then to save you. nothing happened because you didn't buy into it, whereas, those who buy into it will react--maybe we can call that the "beny hinn affect."

Cinorjer

That's because you're the wrong audience for this preacher. Vince Esterman, from what I see on his website, is a revivalist. That is, his mission is to go around to established churches and do a "revival" for the group. His intended audience is the Christian already in the church but needing a little motivation to get out and witness. Some churches have a set "revival week" where guest preachers come in, and sometimes several churches will get together and sponsor a "tent revival" for a visiting guest preacher.

Certainly some of the guest preachers specialize in "altar calls", emotional appeals that get people down to the altar for initial salvation or perhaps reaffirmation of their faith. Those are the services where church members are encouraged to invite friends and unsaved acquaintences to, but Paster Esterman is what you might call a motivational speaker for the existing members. Like I said, you were the wrong audience. So he pegged you as stressed from your body language, and focused in on you, but found a nonbeliever instead of a believer with problems. Crossed communication.

How do I know this? Because I was raised in the Evangelical religion by a family of preachers. Grandmother was a revival preacher, like her father, and my mother and I had a little gospel singing act to go with it. I spent more time in church as a child than I did hanging out with the neighborhood kids. It's an interesting culture.

aMatt

avoidance is best

Well said.

No need to dwell on it, best to just walk away, lyndall. Classic maniplation.

kaci

I am feeling quite sad and unhappy and like iv'e been in a fight with Mike Tyson at the moment don't know why,whether it's my sister in laws daughters situation or the fact this man invaded my personal boundaries?,any thoughts on the feelings of what i am experiencing anybody?.

not sure if this helps much but (as frequently happens) you may have given a clue to the answer/resolution in the next to last sentence ... in fact, personal boundaries (ie. fabricated definitions of self or identity) and prejudices, the maintenance thereof and dependence thereon is another way of describing a (perhaps the) central aspect of what practicing dhamma is designed to address. from that perspective this experience has brought some of those dynamics into bold relief and gives you an opportunity to examine them more closely - and ultimately to realize that they are not-self (anatta). inspecting and analyzing the details of the causal relations of the mental/emotional dynamics while maintaining the perspective "these are not myself" could be very .. well, enlightening. i would encourage you not to just forget it and go on but to take advantage of the intensity of feeling to come to a fuller understanding of what triggered what and how that might be changed. in fact, i sometimes deliberately subject myself to uncomfortable situations like this for exactly those reasons. uncomfortable at first but it stimulates the development of wisdom in the long run.

lyndall

Thanks everyone,Kaci i will look into that,i like to analyze my feelings and why they come about you've put me in the right direction i feel,these experiences can really teach us to really understand ourselves and other concepts and thinking ,maybe i was looking for this one all along!,maybe not so much a wrong move at all.