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Employment problem
I am just coming out of a bad employment experience. Long story short - my line manager psychologically bullied me for months on end, I ended up having a stress breakdown, I took it through the grievance procedure, and they maintained after a wealth of evidence to the contrary that no bullying had taken place (in spite of the fact that the individual crossed several lines laid out by their own policy). They have transferred me to another branch that I physically cannot travel to because trains don't run that early (the job starts at 6am). I am trying to negotiate a severance agreement with them (i.e. them paying me off) and am currently waiting on the outcome of that from my solicitor. In the meantime, I am on unpaid leave and we are financially screwed, not to mention the knot in my chest as a result of waiting.
Am I greedy to want severance pay from them? Should I have just quit - would that have been better, karma-wise? Should I just have compassion for my boss and the company? (I'm working on it, but it's hard.) I need money in order to survive, obviously, but I also feel they need to be made to pay for having treated me badly and forced me into leaving, and having tried to dodge the issue at the grievance stage. But it is my place to do that, or should I have just let karma decide? What's the right thing? I'm massively confused!
Am I greedy to want severance pay from them? Should I have just quit - would that have been better, karma-wise? Should I just have compassion for my boss and the company? (I'm working on it, but it's hard.) I need money in order to survive, obviously, but I also feel they need to be made to pay for having treated me badly and forced me into leaving, and having tried to dodge the issue at the grievance stage. But it is my place to do that, or should I have just let karma decide? What's the right thing? I'm massively confused!
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Comments
Asking money to make 'wrongs' right......it just doesn't work proper that way.
I came from a similar experience a few months ago. My company paid me two months extra, we signed a paper for discharge agreed on both sides. I went looking for a job, during crises it wasn't that easy, but now I found a nice job.
i'm not sure karma fixes stuff just like that. It often requires some active part of you too.
It sounds like a lot is going on over there! I'm sorry for the stress and upset swirling around, it can be very painful to have to sit with such uncertainty and fear.
I think your reaching out to consider the karmic implications of your actions is great! To me, it sounds like you really wish to cultivate a compassionate life. Perhaps it would help if you look for forgiveness for the wrong actions of others. The line manager is living a life of misery, or they would not treat people that way.
Do you meditate? That knot in your chest (as you describe it) gets between you and acting skillfully. The finances will work out in one way or another, and easier if you let go of the old stress and confront your present moment with your awareness and mental tenacity.
If you wish to find compassion for them, perhaps you could recall times in your life when you acted poorly, and see how the line manager's actions are a fruit from the same kind of tree. The same poisons drive all unskillful actions, and it is sad that humankind has such dissonance in it. You might consider doing metta practice on yourself, your family, the company and the manager. Then, rather than anger at the poisons in ourselves and others, we feel warmth and understanding.
With warmth,
Matt
@aMatt, when you say 'do some metta practice', so you mean something specific? I know what metta is but I'm not aware of any way to practice it other than to make the attempt to think in a different way...or is that what you meant?
2. No.
3. N/A.
You did the right thing.
Now you must weigh up what is best? Having a job in a new location or the severance pay?
Can you easily find another job? Will the severance pay be enough?
She was extremely lucky though - a fluke - that the company decided to outsource the work of her whole department and she was given 12 months severance pay, which co-incided with her 10 year long service leave.
So even in big companies bullying is getting worse.
My sister was passive but, generelly, one has no choice but to address it.
I was bullied by a boss so I asked for a new boss. My boss was reduced to tears and I was asked to apologise to her (lol) but she improved. But then, I work for a large govt department, so straightening out your boss is generally easy there.
Are you sure you cannot arrange travel to the new location? Is this just an excuse?
The central issue is whether you can find a new job easily.
Regards
Just as it's important to acknowledge that you're not more important than any other sentient being on this planet, we all need to recognize that we are no _less_ important than anybody else, either. We deserve fair treatment, if we're going to engage in work, commerce, and all of that other troublesome nonsense that not being a monk creates :P.
No, it is not just an excuse. Public travel is not available at that time of day, and even if it was it would cost £10 per day, or around 20% of my income. I am on minimum wage and just cannot afford that. Not to mention getting there on public transport (even if it WAS available at that time of day) involves 3 separate trains and an hour-long commute each way. It's a 9.5 hour day as it is, and I have 2 kids under the age of 5 and am trying to do a degree as well. It's far from a reasonable outcome when I could just find a similar job in my own town.
Luckily for me, I have highly marketable skills in a different area. I am a professional proofreader and I have also been doing some English tutoring. So I am going to use this situation as the push I need to start my own business. I have had enough clients to put together a portfolio of my proofreading work and two references for tutoring, and I am fortunate to be close personal friends with a web designer.
I will keep you in my thoughts and try to send positive energy your way.
:thumbsup:
@tbunton - Heheh, you must have read my mind. I've already been through the ego thing of dreaming of multi-million dollar settlements...it ain't gonna happen any time soon. My solicitor thinks he can get me 6 months' pay, which would be good. But I'll see how it goes. The solicitor was kind enough to waive the setup fee for arranging the severance, so I'm taking that as a positive sign, karmically speaking.
In the meantime, I am deepening my practice and trying to stay calm, although that knot of tension in my chest still keeps coming back. :-/