what a weird thought

AMH

So I have had lots of drama in my life, keeps on coming. Part of it is really what is happening in the world, things get more expensive, jobs and money dry up, you know the deal that affects everyone right now.

I am pretty hard on myself and my life, feeling needy and not good about that. I like to be the helper not hte helpee and for many years I was that, but now it seems I need help everywhere I turn.

Since I can seem to always look at the other side I was thinking, and I have noticed that my extended family and even my ex-husband who has a poor track record have been doing more (we have 3 kids all, teens young adults with medical issues). So maybe this falling apart in my life isn't about me, maybe some things are pushing others to be more compassionate? I have long thought that the international recession has been a opportunity for people to develop compassion and a sense of what is really important, maybe this is one factor in my individual life? Not that I should just wallow in this situation, anyone who knows me knows that I work very very hard and often wear myself out and look for opportunities, etc. But if this helps me be less hard on myself then it works.

Dakini

Let go of needing to be the helper. And think of it this way; you've spent so many years as the helper, it's now your turn to be the helpee. You've put money in the bank, now you can draw on that. It's pretty simple. Count your blessings that you have loved ones who are willing and able to step up to the plate when you're not able to. You're fortunate, indeed.

AMH

Thank you, I am rich with people who care in my life. It is really something I try to focus on. I know I will never be homeless as long as my friends have a roof over their heads. That is the kind of people we are and also run the gamut from athiest to Catholic to Mormon and me.