Guys or Girls? Who IS The Villian?

Argon.Aid

I don't know whether there is any real meaning in this thread but I felt that I have to post this problem that have been weighing on my mind.

Man have always been described as the major villian in a relationship.Always, it is the guy who breaks the girls heart or fools around.Guys have been given an ugly image.I,myself,find it embarrassing to be a guy.

But still,is it really like this?I just realisde something.In a relationship,the girls are the one scutinising all possible guys.Girls are the one who can easily find another guy.They can find "the best love" for themselves.I am speaking from an expereince I had yesterday.

I virtually ran to her tuition area casued I agreed to meet her and was running late.Furthermore I never had my lunch or dinner.I only got disappointed when two of my friends,it could be exxagerations, told me that she was sort of flirting with one of the guys there.

Taking this into account,it had me thinking.This was the reason why I made a woman-hater vow before(Ask Ajani).Truthfully,What brings about this cohesion between both parties in a relationship and Is it really the guys or the girls the real villians?

With all due respect,
With no offense intended,

-Ar.Aid

Knitwitch

With the greatest respect Argon Aid - relationships are a two way thing and it takes two people to work at it to make it successful - in any situation where one party either isn't as interested as their partner or isn't making the effort, the relationship can break down very quickly.

And, trust Granny, it is horribly difficult at your age (but then, it still requires work when you get older too). It's difficult because both the boy and the girl are finding their way in a new adventure and don't have the experience to draw on in their exchanges with the opposite sex. And unfortunately, there is no Relationships For Dummies Book available - it is trial and error for everyone.

Everyone gets hurt in their first experiments at relationships, but fortunately the young heal quickly - it's all part of growing up and the experience is valuable - you learn as you go along, just as you do for the rest of you life.

But Good Luck, wee friend - I DO remember how badly it hurts and I feel for you.

Argon.Aid

Thanks Knitwitch! :winkc:

The reason I wrote this thread was not to find solutions,but to address this arena of doubt.The human mind can be intriguing.:eek2:

With all due respect
With no offense intended

_Ar.Aid

Knitwitch

Oh dear - I thought I had addressed this area of doubt - there are no heros or villains - stereotypes are dangerous.

There are predatory males who care nothing for women's feelings and there are exactly the same types of women out for what they can get and off when something new catches their eye.

So - my answer - who are the villains? Selfish people of both sexes.

Simonthepilgrim

Ajani,

Having been in loving relationships with both men and women, I have had to conclude that bad behaviour and destructive attitudes are not a matter of gender or genitalia, but of mind.

Jason

Simon,

I second that conclusion.



Jason

Brigid

I third that conclusion.

Argon.Aid,

I understand what you are saying and feeling. But it's very important that you do not divide the world up into "us" and "them". This will cause you suffering. In the Buddhist view, we have had countless past lives in which we have been both women and men. Any differences we perceive are illusions. Differences between us are constructs that don't exist in reality.
Read about bodhicitta. It's important to develop compassion for all beings with impartiality, or equanimity, if you prefer. This will put to rest your questions regarding this matter.

With love and respect.
Brigid

Xrayman

Hi Argon and others I think the term is "et al" whatever.

Noticed this little bit of text...."And unfortunately, there is no Relationships For Dummies Book available - it is trial and error for everyone."

Cool, I now know what my next book will be about!

Ok I'll start it here..: Relationships For Dummies........ummm..........I think I have some ideas.......let me think......ah ....mmmm......NO NOTHING HERE.

SORRY.