Opinion of others about us. Indifference = A lot of Peace of Mind.

StoicBuddhistAlex

What you people think about opinion of others and things like fearing open mockery? or Seeking their approval from a buddhist perspective.

Ive been reading some stoicism some buddhism and some about Osho.

One of the things i have found more usefuel is that we should be indifferent to the opinion of others unless this is a master or a person who is also searching for the path and we know that is wise.



What do you think about others opinion. Do you seek fame and their approval? Worried about their mockery?

Stoicism adresses this topic directly but I still have to find some views about this from a buddhist perspective.

taiyaki

it's always two fold. one the projection onto you from the person. next you could really be what the person is interpreting.

so there is correct interpretation and incorrect interpretation.

but from the buddhist point of view the only thing that matters is your thoughts, actions, and habits.

one thing i learned just by living so far is that. everything is a mirror to your mind. so if someone gives you praise, then okay. if someone is giving you negativity, then okay. if someone doesn't care about you, then okay.

it is their interpretation so you cannot help them. you can in a way either try to see their position and thus see if you need to change how you respond or just do nothing and keep working on yourself. we know ourselves the best, but i suppose in a way it is how we respond to others that the real practice begins.


here's the thing. when we start to love our enemies. they no longer are enemies.

when negativity and interpretation is projected onto you. see it for what it is. just thoughts being projected onto you. whether it is true or not it doesn't matter. unless you want it to matter.

thus you have to think about your desires. are you a people pleaser? do you want everyone to like you? do you not care? why don't you care? do you take every single word from another person seriously?

learning to discern from what is valuable and not necessary is a skill. it is a skill that requires clear seeing because we can easily manipulate our interpretations into broadening our ego/desires.

this is quite the shitty answer because i really didn't say anything.

when it comes to the other i just keep trying to be mindful and compassionate. just be kind. don't expect anything.

StoicBuddhistAlex

it's always two fold. one the projection onto you from the person. next you could really be what the person is interpreting.

so there is correct interpretation and incorrect interpretation.

but from the buddhist point of view the only thing that matters is your thoughts, actions, and habits.

one thing i learned just by living so far is that. everything is a mirror to your mind. so if someone gives you praise, then okay. if someone is giving you negativity, then okay. if someone doesn't care about you, then okay.

it is their interpretation so you cannot help them. you can in a way either try to see their position and thus see if you need to change how you respond or just do nothing and keep working on yourself. we know ourselves the best, but i suppose in a way it is how we respond to others that the real practice begins.


here's the thing. when we start to love our enemies. they no longer are enemies.

when negativity and interpretation is projected onto you. see it for what it is. just thoughts being projected onto you. whether it is true or not it doesn't matter. unless you want it to matter.

thus you have to think about your desires. are you a people pleaser? do you want everyone to like you? do you not care? why don't you care? do you take every single word from another person seriously?

learning to discern from what is valuable and not necessary is a skill. it is a skill that requires clear seeing because we can easily manipulate our interpretations into broadening our ego/desires.

this is quite the shitty answer because i really didn't say anything.

when it comes to the other i just keep trying to be mindful and compassionate. just be kind. don't expect anything.

It was a good answer man.

"it's always two fold. one the projection onto you from the person. next you could really be what the person is interpreting."

Whay one could be what that person is saying?

"but from the buddhist point of view the only thing that matters is your thoughts, actions, and habits."

Good .

Hey here are links about this:

This one is buddhist http://buddhistatheart.blogspot.com/2009/11/fame-disgrace.html


This one is Osho : http://www.oshoteachings.com/osho-why-am-i-always-afraid-of-others-opinion/

Enjoy man.

Dakini

You do what's right for you, no matter what others think. You know what works for you, no one else does. Worrying about conforming to others' values or approval can result in your running off a cliff along with the herd, like the lemmings. It can be fatal.

StoicBuddhistAlex

You do what's right for you, no matter what others think. You know what works for you, no one else does. Worrying about conforming to others' values or approval can result in your running off a cliff along with the herd, like the lemmings. It can be fatal.

Yes and leads to a lot of missery. Thanks for reply .

StoicBuddhistAlex

Here is some words of HHDL

Why be unhappy about something when it can be remedied? His Holiness the Dalai Lama notes that if we avoid or turn away from The Eight Worldly Concerns in our spiritual practice, we can reduce suffering.

What are you attached to? What do have aversions to? See if they mirror the Eight Worldly Concerns:

1. Attachment to getting and keeping material things.

2. Aversion to not getting material things or being separated from them.

3. Attachment to praise, hearing nice words, and feeling encouraged.

4. Aversion to getting blamed, ridiculed, and criticized.

5. Attachment to having a good reputation.

6. Aversion to having a bad reputation.

7. Attachment to sense pleasures in general.

Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/dalai-lama-8-worldly-concerns.html#ixzz1ZV72Dabu

Dakini

Be true to yourself. Listen to your inner voice, that's your guide, not anyone else. When you listen to your inner guidance, you'll be fulfilled, so you won't need praise, approval, avoidance of ridicule, etc. The only person's approval you need is yours.

StoicBuddhistAlex

Be true to yourself. Listen to your inner voice, that's your guide, not anyone else. When you listen to your inner guidance, you'll be fulfilled, so you won't need praise, approval, avoidance of ridicule, etc. The only person's approval you need is yours.

Thanks a lot for your words of wisdom Dakini .