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when your heart is broken

AMHAMH
edited October 2011 in General Banter
Have a broken heart. That is the phrase that has been coming to me the last few days. I find myself wanting to run away from it in so many ways. I can tell you that there must be thousands of ways to avoid feeling this! I have only come up with hundreds right now. Even going back and trying to talk it out more with him or friends is still avoiding sitting with a broken heart, just like making large future goals (one very hard thing is that I didn't give up anything that I want to take back while I was with him, there isn't that feeling I can get back to my life without interference like with my divorce) or wanting to be super busy or use this as an excuse to not get things done or talk it over countless times or dream of ways it could have been different or fixed in the future.

meanwile, when your heart is broken, have a broken heart.

Comments

  • taiyakitaiyaki Veteran
    the only way out is through.
  • AMHAMH
    Oh yeah! That has been my saying for quite some time
  • MountainsMountains Veteran
    This too shall pass :)
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    I had one hell of a broken heart, like most of us do at least once. It was not just a typical relationship, it was 'the relationship' in my opinion at the time. I suffered for 6 months because I clung to notions of it still being able to happen and this and that. You just have to let go and give it time, it seems cliche but it is the best way. Good luck with metta,

    tom
  • AMHAMH
    So a few days later and not so many times I am hit with big feelings of sadness. It is getting better. One thing that I am doing that is helping me feel better (I don't know for sure if it affects him) is sending kind compassionate thoughts often. I am not angry, I don;'t hate him, I have big sadness but I just can't be angry at him when I see that in his life overall he is in much bigger pain than so many of us.

    So doing this and having no contact for 2 days, my last email just asked him why he was angry and told him I wasn't angry but i would stick to my resolve to not have big secrets in a relationship. Anyway late last night I got a text telling me to sleep well. Hmm, (no worries, i am not running back or having silly fantasies about the rest of my life, okay!) He is a very angry person and I think it took a lot to be able to do that, that is all. It seems that even not being directly in his life I can still have an effect with compassion.
  • zombiegirlzombiegirl beating the drum of the lifeless in a dry wasteland Veteran
    it is my opinion that some relationships were never meant to last, but simply to provide learning experiences. had i not gone through what i had in the past, my current relationship would never work. i had a lot of things i had to learn first. of course, this is always one of those realizations that appears as a result of hindsight. like taiyaki said, you just gotta go through it.
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