Welcome home! Please contact lincoln@icrontic.com if you have any difficulty logging in or using the site. New registrations must be manually approved which may take several days. Can't log in? Try clearing your browser's cookies.
Semi-frequent light feverish headaches due to meditation?
So I've been having lots of awakening experiences in the last month. Last days I've been feeling great and feel like I'm solving a lot of issues in my life.
Walking outside is great and I'm having insights left and right.
I've never formally meditated. I meditate in weird ways throughout the day for a year or so now. Mindfulness of thoughts, body awareness (feeling my body) while going about, and every now and then breathing meditation lying down. I'm not one to grasp to bliss states, so I just use meditation to relax for a couple of minutes a day or so. Literally a couple (2) of minutes. I'm consciously slowing down the rhythm of spiritual practice and thinking of giving it up altogether for now because I feel things are happening a bit too fast. Maybe due to a life time of mild depression.
Anyway, I've had migraines most of my life but they have eased up significantly in the last few years. But now I'm getting mild forms of migraines consistently throughout the day and my body temperature is usually kinda hot.
Is this normal? Should I be worried about what yogis call kundalini awakenings?
Walking outside is great and I'm having insights left and right.
I've never formally meditated. I meditate in weird ways throughout the day for a year or so now. Mindfulness of thoughts, body awareness (feeling my body) while going about, and every now and then breathing meditation lying down. I'm not one to grasp to bliss states, so I just use meditation to relax for a couple of minutes a day or so. Literally a couple (2) of minutes. I'm consciously slowing down the rhythm of spiritual practice and thinking of giving it up altogether for now because I feel things are happening a bit too fast. Maybe due to a life time of mild depression.
Anyway, I've had migraines most of my life but they have eased up significantly in the last few years. But now I'm getting mild forms of migraines consistently throughout the day and my body temperature is usually kinda hot.
Is this normal? Should I be worried about what yogis call kundalini awakenings?
0
Comments
in my experience sometimes training we develop the habit of pushing thoughts and mind states, and this causes headaches.
Hope it helps.
Also if you are doing long periods of concentration and not ever zoning out that can cause odd mental phenomena. Its one thing to do a sitting meditation and concentrate, but doing it all day is like putting pressure on the mind and that pressure can have odd effects. The mind needs to diffuse out. Concentration isn't the goal of meditation rather it is a factor along with many others that must be BALANCED. So too much concentration out of balance.
That being said it sounds like you have gotten super results from your meditation. I'd keep it going and just see what happens if you are gentle and notice what foods.
Of course ideal you could go to a center with a knowledgeable meditator and pick their brain as well.
(mold, formaldehyde, food allergies) that irritates the body, causing an exaggerated response.
It's relatively easy to see when someone breaks out in hives and gasps for breath immediately after eating their particular allergen... (quick! get the emergency epinephrine before they stop breathing!)
but it's not nearly so easy to see when exposure to mold hidden in the office ceiling tiles above your head all day gives you a headache by the end of the day.
Such headaches can also be associated with poor air quality in general (C02 levels, combustion residuals, VOC's) and also some electromagnetic exposure effects (including industrial noise above or below the range of human hearing).
While it is true that people sometimes can get headaches with opening 3rd eye activity and kundalini issues, if good grounding and sinking the energy of the body from down out of the head doesn't fix it...
please keep a journal of what you eat and drink and do in order to investigate possible air quality, toxin, allergen, and/or electromagnetic exposure issues that might be affecting you.
If you have had a lifetime of headaches and mild depression,
you might very well have some undetected allergy or food sensitivity issues that you might not be aware of, and keeping a journal might be the only way to see a clear association and/or provide enough data for a physician to make a diagnosis.
does it hurt? or is it just pressure?
Also are you coming from the position of the witness?
You say you've had awakening experiences. What does this mean? Is it stable or is it just a PCE (pure consciousness experience)?
Do you feel presence? Do you feel a vast spaciousness?
you might find that with some formal meditation the depression and stress eases up a bit. you may also find that the increased concentration & mindfulness you gain from formal sitting will help you better integrate your realizations without having them become 'stressors'. sometimes it all happens very fast and it can seem overwhelming, being able to slow the thinking process and stop the incessant ruminating and analyzing is supremely important, in my opinion, for being to flow with the spiritual process which can sometimes SEEM overwhelming and uprooting.
i just wanna throw in as well, that the purpose of meditation is to gain experiential understanding of the truths taught by the Buddha...experiences the 3 marks of reality & 4 noble truths at the phenomenological level... and has nothing to do with 'grasping at bliss states'.
Life will topple you from the bliss regardless, so you might as well enjoy the bliss states as ephemeral and impermanent as they may be.
"He who lives happiest has forgotten most"
Robert Anton Wilson
Good to hear the news that you're feeling better about life in general.
I can't prove to any of you, but since I was a little kid I've always been very much about consciousness....I was never spiritual per se....but I'm all about the gut feelings and there's something telling me, the fact I don't meditate too much isn't evidence of anything really. I've practiced the dharma since I was a kid in more ways than one, and aside from meditation I've been directly applying the insights everyday.
I need to stress out people that my knowledge of the dhamma is not vast to say the least. I've always been very conscious of patterns and very empathic from a young age, and I loved to understand the world so apart from a few talks by Ajahn Brahm, Alan Watts and the like...and apart from an intention to become more aware of stuff during my day I haven't formally practiced buddhism at all.
Compassionate_Warrior : yes, the last couple of days I've been keeping myself awake more at night. It should be said that I've never been known for particular great sleeping patterns the last two years or so.
Taiyaki : I've just googled PCE, and I don't think that's it. I feel I'm less fearful, angry and just now starting to really open my heart to people...slowly. I can't help but feeling sexual energy is flowing abundantly. I've always been very ascetic sexually and slightly closed off to girls in particular...and now they seem to always have their eyes glued on me, if that makes sense. I've also experienced seeing the wisdom in anything and everyone to varying degrees. I've always been very disconnected from my body and now I feel what I can only imagine are vast amounts of prana flowing through my body. I'm aware of symbolism. Every time I meet a familiar face I feel like the relationship with that person is being healed, if it makes sense.
I've had one experience where I clearly felt my center was abruptly shifting, but that was like a month ago and now I feel it's mostly evenly distrubuted throughout the body. One day I also got kinda scared about what felt like siddhis and I'm kinda afraid of experiencing such stuff. Being very self-aware (as pretentious as that sounds) the responsibility of weilding such powers are very blatant to me, and have never felt tempted (far from it).
I've also had an INSANE burst of creativity. I've always felt I was really creative but I was always really lazy and stubborn and indecisive about what was really worth my attention. So it feels like all the creativity I've had inside of me is wanting to burst out.
Between toxic food and grounding energy and whatever else...I'm afraid you guys will have to treat me as really ignorant in this whole thing. I've never had a teacher, I've always done stuff alone at home and my background in all things spiritual is almost non-existent.
Just to clarify, this mild-depression I've described isn't the clinical kind. I meant I've always been slightly sad inside, holding a lot of emotions. Unable to say no to people a lot of the time but a very contradictory character. I'm a firm believer in unconditonal love and always felt that towards people but due to my sensitivity and full blown empathy...as a male, I learned to be a bit rough on the exterior (altho everyone eventually understands I'm actually a nice guy). I'm not a push-over so I learned to project a little anger towards people..but it was never heartfelt. I guess I've consciously and unconsciously always tried to do the best for people and not thought about my needs....internalizing a lot of pain which I never had that many close friends to share with....so powerful unravellings where bound to happen at some point.
learn to ground your chakras and balance them. there are many good books for this.
i just finished reading chakras for dummies, kundalini rising, and kundalini tantra by swami satyananda saraswati.
i think reading those looks will open you up to the maps/territory of what you are experiencing.
energy is influenced by many things. diet, sleep, routine, etc.
think of your body as a laboratory and play with different variables.
i highly recommend an exercise routine. lifting weights, running, yoga, tai chi.
i wouldn't worry about it killing you or anything. kundalini energy is safe for the most part. the only problems are energy overloads/chakra imbalances. they will all sort itself out as you progress on your path.
i don't recommend taking drugs such as lsd or marijuana, etc for it really plays with kundalini energy on an almost uncomfortable level.
i feel intense spinning winds in various parts of my body. at times its overwhelming and it really messes my sleep. but i've learn to just embrace it all. just sensation!
We have 5 factors: vigor and persistance, RELAX within that*, heart with confidence, openness to develope gradually -gentle to ourselves and merciful to others, fifth we need to understand that awareness ebbs and flows, and that there are ways to encourage awareness.
Epicurus: GET IN TOUCH WITH A TEACHER.. what you say sounds quite similar to what I experienced in a psychotic break. If you can navigate and avoid that with the help of a teacher... I am hoping for you.
Don't stick to any thoughts/symbols...The main fault is to concretize things. Just let them flow. Watch some Mooji... Attachment to states and thoughts is a negative in avoiding or recovering from bipolar spectrum of disorders... If you can avoid that... I am hoping for you that you can..
*this is what you need to work on is my guess
Btw I forgot to mention I do feel I'm very much still inside my body. I've also recently been operated in the sacral area to a pillonidal cyst.
Taiyaki : I've read some kundalini horror stories. I do feel heat in my sacral area due to the operation, and some lower back pain. Could you help me find some very simple and basic kundalini tips? Because I don't know which stuff to apply.
This might sound kinda stupid, but I'm not at all interested in enlightenment. I see people delving into spirituality wanting that...but I really don't. I just want to live normally and balanced.
So should I focus on the present? I've been having lots of ideas about where to move in the near future professionally and stuff. Also, I've never had a very healthy diet when it comes to veggies and fruit, so maybe I'm eating too much crap? (no junk food either, just home cooked stuff...but not one to eat salads and skip fruit). Also water is not something I consume because the tap water is tasting funky lately and I forget to drink much water.
Should I try going to any spa where reiki or yoga or whatever is practiced? I can't spend much money at this point in my life, but should I schedule somekind of appointment with some kind of holistic technician?
I find myself exercising my joints and walking a lot. I've just recently been operated so I need to take it easy.
I've also done the first unpainful body stretching in years...like the prana is trying to tell me to even out some tensions and stuff.
All of these can be ascribed to awakening, but they also can be symptoms of hypomania. Just take that in consideration, I would also say to go to a local buddhist group and get in touch there.
Also, aren't mental "diseases" just extreme cases of normal human insanity?
I mean, lol...it's kinda ridiculous to consider I could end up crazy, since I'm considered by a lot of people to be a very well balanced individual...but what should I be on the look out for?
I'm slightly wary of boogieman advice (not saying that is the case) in general, because I think it usually does more harm than good. I mean awakening isn't something mystical....it's awareness we were born in anyway and that varies throughout life no? Like, how level of consciousness varies. Besides, if something terrible were to happen in terms of mind...wouldn't it be simply a matter of facing the fear, or the anger or the emotion like meditation tells us?
Don't misunderstand me, I really appreciate the advice
I'm just not talking about me now but in general terms. I kinda dislike fear propaganda because I think that's exactly what keeps people afraid in general. Awakenings or no awakenings.
I don't want to make you fear, just tune in and if your thinking seems out of control a safe place to go is a health care professional. Idealy a meditation master who understands mind-body quite well.
Both of those options would be valuable even if this is a false alarm and you don't develope bipolar.
I am trying not to be a boogeyman, but as you age you will find that you are not immortal along the lines of "whoa I thought this was what happened to other people"
The mooji video I sent is actually medicine against fear. Fear is what happens when you are in a bind of concretization of ideas. You are feeling more creative and seeing symbolism. And feeling a quality of 'special' things? This makes it tempting to concretize those ideas. And fear can enter into the equation.
I'm not thinking most of the day...I mean not any more than I did 3 months ago. Like...I feel I have everything under control and life is normal...the only difference being I'm opening up more in matters of the heart. Not speaking it all out and freaking people out, but being gentle and slow about it.
I don't get your immortal comment at all. Am I supposed to feel I am immortal? :P
I've had thoughts on all matter of stuff....but the ones I feel compelled to concretize are playing an instrument and maybe go ahead and move abroad like I've always wanted so I can see new things. Nothiing major. I haven't felt fear. I've had it once a couple of months ago, little visual traumas from childhood...but I faced the terror once or twice. But these experiences have had nothing in the way of fear. When I said fear before I meant....my natural need to make sure I don't take wrong routes, that's all.
Don't get me wrong I really don't want to be arrogant here, I do want to drink any advice you guys can have for me on the matter but I wanna be realistic and be able to move my life with confidence. I mean it's not like my behavior is extremely different. As I'm sitting here writing you this I'm very chill. Not feeling so much energy after doing some stretches...and I'm ok.
I guess apart from fear, what are any objective criteria I should be on the look out for? Lol, I'm really just trying to
understand here. I mean, lets says I do start to sleep less or do this or that. Should I consciously trying to to bed a little early to sleep more, things like that?
Ahh now I see what you mean by fear. That is the good side of fear. Concretization is an insight that you sort of dwell on. It might not be happening to you! For example a very sick psychotic person might be asked..."whats on your mind" and they say "my hair". You might think you have powers.
When I became bipolar everything had such beautiful bright energy. I would like to think you could experience the positive side of that without the negative I have had to deal with! Being bipolar isn't whole a negative but it is just an illness and I and others can still have a great life. With any luck you will just get the positive side. Sounds like you have already had some mild depression to deal with and I am glad that is lifting.
The objective criteria for bipolar that I remember or have added:
*spending lots of money (or thinking about)
*risky behaviour
*pressure to talk
*weird experiences with strangers (this isn't in the official medical criteria)
greater sexual drive and behaviours
*colors brighter
*sounds more distinct, I never could hear sound lyrics until my psychotic break and now I hear them quite clearly
beliefs in powers and special hidden realizations
*loose associations, kind of like intuition gone bad... I have hard time explaining this one
*starting on a million brilliant ideas and not able to concentrate on one thing
*irritability (mania mixed with depression)
*rapid speach where you lose track of what you are trying to say sort of veering off into tangents
*prideful
*alcohol and drug use (to medicate mood)
*flight of ideas
*sleep abnormalities
if not, then watch some yoga videos on youtube and practice. really anything where you are using the body, breathing and keeping awareness.
any yoga is good. any.
(Hint: if it's got 'Meditation' in the title, then usually, that's the forum they need to go into....)