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i am just bored, it is okay. I seemed to always have some anxiety, something hanging over my head, a stress or a drama. Whew, (I quit my 2nd job and only work the normal 5 days a week now, after years of juggling multiple jobs up to 7 days a week on a regular basis). So i have a clean kitchen, a clean bedroom, I even did the oven.
I think I don't want to get into another project right this minute because i am a little tired, but also not go to sleep, and if I meditate i will sleep so I will wait.
The differnce is that I don't have this constant GOAL, the thing I am striving for, working on, the thing that will make the difference, it is all just okay. Taking some time to get used to.
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"Goal" is a 4-letter word.