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Things Getting Worse or Better?

ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
edited February 2012 in Buddhism Basics
Some days ago I mentioned how I have realized that I have lost interest in aspects of my life, it did not seem a problem, but I was just a bit miffed. I felt as if I was becoming an old man or something. Now I am finding that I am losing more and more interest in things. The internet, I rarely even go on it. I email my mother daily but my friends in the UK I rarely talk to anymore. I have stopped using all social networks because I simply am bored of them and the internet is the only electronic media in my house. I have also noticed that the urge to have sex has gone, but that is not to say that I still do not have sex on a regular basis with my partner, when I do it is enjoyable, but the urge is not there. I have studied this specifically and it isnot due to me becoming less attracted to my partner.

Yesterday my partner had the day off of work and we went out and did some things, after we were sitting in our house. I was talking with her and she was complaiing about how she felt tired when she worked and how she felt bored when she had nothing to do sometimes when she was not at work. I sat there and realized how she has one big monkey mind. I guess I have come to a point where I can be a a really simplistic situation for a long period of time, and not become bored. Why, I do not know. Is this a good thing, again I do not know that answer.

Comments

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    You seem to have hit a plateau where 'going down' is definitely not the favourable option, but 'continuing up'...well, you're just not quite ready to move anywhere yet....

    whuuuumph......
  • ZeroZero Veteran
    do you think you may be slipping into mild depression?

    What kind of thoughts are you having when youre sitting around not doing anything and not being bored?

    If it helps, I am also going through one of these phases where I am switching around activities and doing new / old stuff etc - I've always been a bit like that though - varying interests are healthy - my friend keeps telling its because its 2012 - end of an age and all that! I'm not so sure but maybe?
  • Lady_AlisonLady_Alison Veteran
    I get how you feel. @zero brought up something I didn't think about.

    Maybe it is healthy detachment and you are growing into other areas.
  • ittybittybatittybittybat
    Like the others said, you could be maturing and growing to love other things that are not the things you are used to doing (did that make sense?) or suffering from some sort of depression. But to me, it just sounds like you are starting to fall out of love with the things you used to do. I used to love different things than I do now.

    Our interests all come in cycles.

    Try spending some time in nature and see if you find beauty there. Try new things that you have never done before, and see what you enjoy. Be it bungee jumping or trying a new restaurant.
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    I don't think it's depression, I have had that before. To answer your question @zero, when I have nothing to do my thoughts are often pretty blank if that makes sense-that is if I am not observing things as they happen like for example watching how a situation will effect my mood, my girlfriends mood etc, maybe staring at the fan lol.

    I guess as we all do I am probably passing into another phase as has been said, another chapter. I have even grown uninterested in design and photography to a degree, it is more of the lack of intention to want to do such things that does not exist now.
  • ZeroZero Veteran
    If it makes you feel better TT I may also be there!! I considered that perhaps I am just meditating more but maybe not... I also find myself not doing stuff and just sitting...
  • weightedweighted Veteran
    Another chapter begins, it sounds like. I'm right there with you, too.
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    Some days ago I mentioned how I have realized that I have lost interest in aspects of my life, it did not seem a problem, but I was just a bit miffed. I felt as if I was becoming an old man or something. Now I am finding that I am losing more and more interest in things. The internet, I rarely even go on it. I email my mother daily but my friends in the UK I rarely talk to anymore. I have stopped using all social networks because I simply am bored of them and the internet is the only electronic media in my house. I have also noticed that the urge to have sex has gone, but that is not to say that I still do not have sex on a regular basis with my partner, when I do it is enjoyable, but the urge is not there. I have studied this specifically and it isnot due to me becoming less attracted to my partner.

    Yesterday my partner had the day off of work and we went out and did some things, after we were sitting in our house. I was talking with her and she was complaiing about how she felt tired when she worked and how she felt bored when she had nothing to do sometimes when she was not at work. I sat there and realized how she has one big monkey mind. I guess I have come to a point where I can be a a really simplistic situation for a long period of time, and not become bored. Why, I do not know. Is this a good thing, again I do not know that answer.

    So what do you do when you are not doing things you described above? What other hobbies are you focusing on?
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    Another chapter begins, it sounds like. I'm right there with you, too.
    Care to share?
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    If it makes you feel better TT I may also be there!! I considered that perhaps I am just meditating more but maybe not... I also find myself not doing stuff and just sitting...
    What type of medication are you taking?
  • ZeroZero Veteran
    :D meditation... not medication! I'm on multivitamins at the mo'... 1 a day.
  • Lady_AlisonLady_Alison Veteran
    @zero is addicted to life.
    :)
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    edited February 2012
    @zero have you looked at the ingredients on your multi vitamins? I was taking them for a period of time and I saw that some of the vitamins or minerals were at 200% RDA, and they also had stuff like tin and sillicon in them lol..

    @Leon um what other hobbies do I have at the moment. poker, the thai language, yoga and if you can call them hobbies, spending quality time with my partner and learning about life, but I wouldn't call them hobbies. I guess I should go and try new things see, what floats this boat as has been said above.
  • ZeroZero Veteran
    ;) I'm on some weightloss so I've been supplementing - youre right though - had a look at the bottle today and its vitamin overkill + a lot of weird ingredients!! I saw a study once that showed that people who take multivitamins are more likely to develop cancer or they die younger (in a comparative study of those that did not take multivitamins) - I assumed that perhaps those who dont take multivitamins take more care to eat well etc and perhaps that is better... I suppose also perhaps multivits arent good for you... hmmm
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    @zero have you looked at the ingredients on your multi vitamins? I was taking them for a period of time and I saw that some of the vitamins or minerals were at 200% RDA, and they also had stuff like tin and sillicon in them lol..

    @Leon um what other hobbies do I have at the moment. poker, the thai language, yoga and if you can call them hobbies, spending quality time with my partner and learning about life, but I wouldn't call them hobbies. I guess I should go and try new things see, what floats this boat as has been said above.
    Exactly! Anyway to sign up for some sort of class? Any community centers around you?
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    There is a meditation class which I have known about for months now, community centres, I have no idea if they even exist in thailand, if they do I doubt they are what they are in the west. If there is to be any decent organized classes it will be conducted by expats I assume, especially in this town.
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    There is a meditation class which I have known about for months now, community centres, I have no idea if they even exist in thailand, if they do I doubt they are what they are in the west. If there is to be any decent organized classes it will be conducted by expats I assume, especially in this town.
    Well, it's worth a try right? :)
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    It is, though you know the old story, me stopping me. Anxiety and all that crap. I will have to look up the schedule for the times again because I know they do not run all year round. The meditation class I mean.
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    It is, though you know the old story, me stopping me. Anxiety and all that crap. I will have to look up the schedule for the times again because I know they do not run all year round. The meditation class I mean.
    Definitely try it! Or you can do it online! At least that will help you meet new people in your area perhaps?
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    Yea, it is silly really. I kick myself every time I come back from my thai lessons because I have that notion of fear and anxiety before hand, but during the lesson we have a laugh and learn, I am often someone who speaks up and asks questions as I know a lot of Thai already. But of course, this is after I have taken my medication. I am still the person on the outside before I take my medication, after I take it I am still the same on the outside but I do not have a problem anymore. It is really quite irrational.
  • DaltheJigsawDaltheJigsaw Mountain View Veteran
    Yea, it is silly really. I kick myself every time I come back from my thai lessons because I have that notion of fear and anxiety before hand, but during the lesson we have a laugh and learn, I am often someone who speaks up and asks questions as I know a lot of Thai already. But of course, this is after I have taken my medication. I am still the person on the outside before I take my medication, after I take it I am still the same on the outside but I do not have a problem anymore. It is really quite irrational.
    I understand! All that matters is that you are trying!
  • mithrilmithril Veteran
    Are things getting worse or better?

    Worse, definitely worse. Now that that happened, you are even closer to death.

    (But aren't we all).
  • Lady_AlisonLady_Alison Veteran
    Tom...are you anxious meeting new people. You have such a great personality...if I met you for Thai tea with your girlfriend would that stress you out? I don't understand your disorder.
  • ThailandTomThailandTom Veteran
    The initial idea of meeting you for thai tea would make me anxious, but I would throw myself into the situation and I am sure there would be no issues. My GF does not understand my disorder, it is social anxiety, google it if you want, but I have quite an extreme case of it to be honest. I do not fully understand where it stems from, but I have had some for of anxiety disorder since the age o about 10.
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