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Already Broken....Already Dead
Recently, I came across a very clear explanation of impermenance. This is sort of what it said online;
When I go to drink out of a glass, I realize that the glass is already broken. I can then truly cherish it. It holds my drink admirably and when it finally falls and breaks, I realize that the glass was already broken.
I believe that the same can be applied toward life, mine, yours, everyone's. I realize that life is already fleeting and that I am in a sense already dead. When I see this, I understand that life is too short and frail to pass by with a 'do it tomorrow' attitude. This moment is the most important and it should be cherished.
I tried explaining this to my sister but she said it was too pessimistic. Anyone else share such a similar view.
When I go to drink out of a glass, I realize that the glass is already broken. I can then truly cherish it. It holds my drink admirably and when it finally falls and breaks, I realize that the glass was already broken.
I believe that the same can be applied toward life, mine, yours, everyone's. I realize that life is already fleeting and that I am in a sense already dead. When I see this, I understand that life is too short and frail to pass by with a 'do it tomorrow' attitude. This moment is the most important and it should be cherished.
I tried explaining this to my sister but she said it was too pessimistic. Anyone else share such a similar view.
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Ikkyu, the Zen master, was very clever even as a boy. His teacher had a precious teacup, a rare antique. Ikkyu happened to break this cup and was greatly perplexed. Hearing the footsteps of his teacher, he held the pieces of the cup behind him. When the master appeared, Ikkyu asked: "Why do people have to die?"
"This is natural," explained the older man. "Everything has to die and has just so long to live."
Ikkyu, producing the shattered cup, added: "It was time for your cup to die."
i read your thoughts and im greatly inspired.
hats off to you man!
and im sure you wont go ego tripping on what i type here either.
i just want to let you no i honour your wisdom..
you shine .. i hope you hang with significant others who feed you
and open the door for you to fly through every now and then.
i cant say enough!!
in response to what you wrote.. i get it.. but
just explain ( im slow tehe ) .. how the glass is broken before it breaks.?
I THINK i hear ya??!!
The first hello is the sound of the last goodbye.... whether for an hour or an eon, everything has a start, and a finish.
This can be taken as a downer, but that particular downer is for the benefit of all when realized in the context of the dharma.
http://www.hundredmountain.com/Pages/dharmatalk_pages/dharma_ondeath2.html
_/\_
metta
_/\_
metta
Colleen....Everything is impermanent and transitory
yes i realize that fed..
just i guess i seen everything as.. begining middle and end ..
when really its all happening at the same time..
: )
Could you further elaborate on the
really it's all happening at the same time.
I guess I've just always viewed it more along the lines of inevitable.
perhaps "transitory" is the word to use like fed said.
??
When I say that the glass is already broken or that I am already dead, I mean that the arising of an object or person ultimately seals it's fate. For now it is subject to cessation. I believe that when we truly realize the impermanence of a thing or person, it becomes much easier to cherish it in this very moment.
and thanks again to ZM for helpin me on the path.
: )
My father and mother were bickering and bickering the other day until I couldn't take it anymore. I told my father that my mother could die in the next fifteen minutes and asked him if this was the way he'd like to spend the last fifteen minutes of her life with her. He tried to find something sarcastic to say but it was half hearted. They're old, in their mid-70s, yet they never contemplate the imminence of death. It's not a downer. It's a reality check. Luckily for them I'm here to remind them. lol!!
When I go into the kitchen and it's a mess because no one bothered to clean up after themselves I used to get angry. Now I think that if my mother were to die in her sleep tonight, that dirty spoon she left on the counter would become precious to me and I wouldn't want to move it, for a while. Or those dishes my father didn't bother to put in the sink. Know what I mean? It helps me override my silly self and cherish them like I should be doing. I have no idea how much time together we have left. I don't want to waste a single second. I think that's one of the reasons life is so peaceful now. They're reading Thich Nhat Hanh, too. lol! But that wasn't my idea! I'd never try to convert or confuse them.
Thank you for your post , you have given me a new perspective.
Namaste,
Michelle
I bow to your wisdom, Good Sir Knight. Your insight belies your years. I truly pray you are able to use the precious opportunity of this life to achieve your ultimate purpose for the benefit of us all.
Palzang
a mother lost her child.. and was so grieved that she went to the buddha asking how she could bring him back.. the buddha said for her to go around her village and find a house where nobody had died, she went all aroud the village and found that someone had died in each house.. when she went back to the buddha she finally understood
Seriously, tho', meditation on death in a boneyard has brought me much fruit.
Palzang
_/\_
metta
Try it, dear heart, you might be surprised!
We'll be dead an awful lot longer than we are alive....I hope to mark my gravestone - if indeed, I decide to have one at all, with the simple words:-
"To be continued..."
Palzang
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply that we hang around our bodies for 49 days. The consciousness leaves the body at death and enters the bardo of the intermediate state where it eventually locates its next rebirth. Traditionally, according to the Bardo Thodrol, the passage through the bardo to the next rebirth takes 49 days, tho I wouldn't take that as written in stone. As with all things in Tibetan Buddhism, numbers are laden with symbolism, so it may not literally be 49 days. However, to answer your question, there are certain guidelines that I have been taught for when someone does die. Of course, some of these are contingent to the circumstances where the death occurs, so you do the best you can then.
First of all, when the person is dying, you don't want to touch them anywhere on the body except for the crown of the head. The idea is to attract their consciousness to the crown of the head as that is the most auspicious place on the body for the consciousness to depart. When one is taught Phowa, the practice for transfering the consciousness at the moment of death, you practice visualizing the consciousness leaving the crown chakra and going directly into Amitabha's heart. Thus one can be born directly into Amitabha's Pure Land. This is the most auspicious rebirth.
Once the person is pronounced dead, it is best not to touch the body at all for up to a day afterwards. One also should avoid a lot of emotional display in the vicinity of the body, such as loud grieving, people hugging the body, etc. This will tend to confuse the consciousness and make it difficult for it to separate from the body. The more peaceful and quiet the death, the better. After a day or so, it's OK to move the body and prepare it for whatever sort of burial or cremation you're planning. Cremation is usually considered best (or sky burial, but that's usually looked down upon in the West!). Normally what is done in Tibet is that the astrologer is consulted for the most auspicious day to perform the cremation. That, of course, is up to you.
Another thing that they do in Tibet that you may find it helpful to do is to read the Bardo Thodrol to the dead person. The book is divided up into 49 days, so you read the appropriate day to the person. I don't mean you have to be in the presence of the body. You just address the person as if they were there. The purpose is to help guide the person through the bardo. It is also a good practice, if the person is amenable, to read it to the person before they die. This is something that they do in an AIDS hospice in California run by Ram Dass, and the patients generally find it extremely comforting, but again, it depends on the person and whether they would be open to it.
That's about it in a brief nutshell (as opposed to a long nutshell). Did I leave anything out?
Palzang
I've been searching for clear, concise information like this for months, clearly in the wrong places. This is exactly what I wanted to know. It's perfect and it's also a relief to know what to have done when I die and when my parents die.
I got the "body hanging around for 49 days" thing from misreading something else, not from what you said, so no worries.
Thank you a million times, Palzang. I really, really appreciate this.
For you (and others like you who wish to learn more about this), you should check our website, www.tara.org, periodically to watch for Phowa teachings from Jetsunma. She holds Phowa retreats every so often and teaches you the whole package. She hasn't done one for a while, so maybe that'll happen before long. Of course, if you make wishing prayers for her to teach Phowa, that will certainly help! Lamas do respond when so beseeched. And in her case, you'll be getting it straight from the source as she achieved the realization of deathlessness with Padmasambhava himself in Marathika Cave in Nepal in a former existence. There is no one on this planet at this time who can do it better. Certainly it will be an experience that will rearrange your molecules, to put it mildly. Certainly it did mine!
Palzang
Thanks again!
I've also saved the web site. Thank you.
I have read The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying I read it while my grandmother was dying and it was very helpful. The last 5 days of her life was just what the book said it would be. But after she died I was going to follow the instructions to help her pass thro the bardo but the book said that if they are not Buddhist ( she was Christian) to not do so because I could upset her and cause problems for her while she was in the bardo....well that's how I understood it. Did I understand it correctly?
Deb
It's interesting that you say that. In Tich Naht Hahn's teaching he has said that rubbing a persons feet is good practice for the dying, especially when the person is suffering, because the dying often lose sensations in their extremities and that stimulating touch can bring them back to the present moment beyond their pain.
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As for Thich Nhat Hanh, I'm just telling you what I was taught. Obviously there are different schools of thought on the matter, so best to follow the one that you prefer. I also think massaging the feet during the process of dying might be good, but don't do it when the person is actively going through the dying process or after death. That's definitely the wrong end of the body to focus on!
Deb, I've never heard that, so I don't know. I read it for my mother, but whether it did any good or not, who knows? Everyone experiences the bardo through their own cultural filters. Some people see angels and devils, Buddhists see bodhisattvas and protectors, so everybody passes through the bardo, but the experience is different. Most people actually pass out once they realize they're dead and don't experience most of the bardo consciously anyway. If you're wondering how they can experience anything when they're dead, well, I'll leave you to ponder that one!
Palzang
Blessings in your practice,
Deb