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Avoiding practice/meditation...
The post I read here the other day about the person who got more chores for complaing about chores, and how some people got less chores for avoiding meditation, made me realize that I would have been one of those people who were made to sit. At the last retreat I went to, by the last two days I started helping out more with the kitchen and avoided some practice that way... which is weird I think.
Practice in my school of Buddhism is pretty simple, it dosen't need to take more than 15-20 mins a day and I easily waste hours upon hours on the internet so it's not an issue of time. I'm usually pretty good a pin-pointing why I'm avoiding something, but I'm totally at a loss on this one. When I was closer to my sangha I went every time I got a chance, and when I am alone I almost always neglect my practice. I try to tell myself that all the reading I've been doing somehow counts and covers for the lack of meditation, but I know that I'm B.S.ing myself... because study and practice are equally important. Any advice, or other guilty parties so I don't feel alone?
Practice in my school of Buddhism is pretty simple, it dosen't need to take more than 15-20 mins a day and I easily waste hours upon hours on the internet so it's not an issue of time. I'm usually pretty good a pin-pointing why I'm avoiding something, but I'm totally at a loss on this one. When I was closer to my sangha I went every time I got a chance, and when I am alone I almost always neglect my practice. I try to tell myself that all the reading I've been doing somehow counts and covers for the lack of meditation, but I know that I'm B.S.ing myself... because study and practice are equally important. Any advice, or other guilty parties so I don't feel alone?
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Comments
That being said there is also the aversion to being indoors with others that I need to work on.. we all know that the outward setting should not really matter for our practice, but it takes time to get there.
I've never really been able to "avoid" practice though.. there are set times and set jobs and there is never a time where a visitor can " help out in the kitchen and miss meditation", at Bhavana Society. The only avoiding of the practice I ever did, even during my first retreats where 5-6 hours of meditation daily was killing me, was that I wanted to meditate outside and not inside, I never outright skipped meditation except one time where I fell asleep during a break.
When I spoke with Bhante Seelananda about my desire to be outside he said that in a retreat everyone stays together and I should try to be inside.. I've followed that advice ever since and I'm glad I did as I can see my aversion lessen each time. My favorite group meditation was when 8 of us meditated until 11pm on Vesak this year (which was also Uposatha), we were in a semi circle and I believed what Bhante said about group energies then.. it was pretty magical in a way.
as a last piece of advice, you can try to build a habit of it.. do a sit every morning.. even if it only lasts a minute or two, be kind to your body and mind.. when they are done they are done.. as you do it daily, build up the habit, your time will increase and you will want to do it every morning.
On the other hand, if you really don't think meditation is worthwhile, then you don't have to do it.
And I'm gonna get back to it just as soon as I stop typing.