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another accident

SabineSabine Veteran
edited October 2006 in General Banter
I totalled my car yesterday (feel your pain, Brian). I was going over a hill and I made a left turn - without double-checking to make sure no one was in the oncoming lane - and lo and behold, *SMASH*.

I don't even know what to do...I had to go to school today, but I cried all day long. I know, it's just a material object, and both of us came out of the accident all right (well, he had a cut on his forehead, and I have bruises across my legs), but I'm so upset...I don't know what my insurance is going to do, I might lose my license because I've only been driving a few months, my mom's stressed out because she has to start back taking me to school in the mornings...

And my grandmother had a stroke, and my brother's in the hospital, and our heater broke.

What did I do wrong? Did I somehow cause all of this? I just want to go to college in one piece, but it's starting to look impossible.
And I'm sorry for disappearing for a bit, then coming back being all negative, but as I said, life has been one big irritation after another lately and I don't have anyone else to talk to. It seemed like no one cared at school today, except a few of my teachers. My "friends" were all silent and weird in class.

I missed you all :( I hope everyone's doing all right. I'll go and read the rest of the forums now, I just had to get that off of my chest.

Comments

  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited October 2006
    Oh Sabine, you poor sweetie.... Look on the bright side. You're still here, and we're still so lucky to have you amongst us...! Boy if this isn't part of your learning curve, I don't know what is! Take heart... it will be a great teaching moment on being in the moment, taking extra care, and rejoicing in the life still coursing through your veins....!

    I really hope things don't turn out too grim for you, insurance and licence wise.... take heart sweet thing...You're not alone.... so many youngsters have accidents in their first years of driving.... Thank goodness you are ok....

    I'm saddened to hear of your other trials too... But know that Life is what it is.... It's up to us to seek the positive challenges and lessons.... Things may look bad, but it's at times like these that our own inner strength props us up.... Our 'Spiritual' skeleton holds us tall and strong, in the face of the oncoming storm.

    With metta, and a hug.....

    Fede
  • harlanharlan
    edited October 2006
    You did nothing wrong. Well....maybe you should have looked left more than once. ;)

    Seriously...you are just in the thick of living life right now. Focus on the good, and remember to breathe. Life comes in waves...sometimes it is an easy ride up and then there are the storms.

    Believe it or not....right now...this storm you are in...is your practice for the rest of your life. It's an opportunity to learn to balance...adversity is actually a good thing!

    Best wishes on your journey. (and some hugs too...because we all need a hug now and then :) )
  • ajani_mgoajani_mgo Veteran
    edited October 2006
    Mettas, my sweet friend!

    There's nothing wrong you did - don't go feeling creepy. Murphy's Law just isn't working nicely in your favour, I guess.

    Hugs! :)
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited October 2006
    Oh Sabine! Lots of hugs to you! And please don't worry....you didn't do anything wrong. We all go through these things, and they do all seem to hit at once. Like the others said, just breathe and try to live in each moment. This will all pass soon...

    Hang in there! We're all here for you!
  • BrigidBrigid Veteran
    edited October 2006
    Oh, Sabine!! My heart is just aching for you! I totaled my car too, a few years ago and it was SO frightening and awful. I was so mad at myself and it took a few weeks to shake off the jitters. It was just horrible.

    Now comes the good news. Once the bad feelings recede a bit (and let yourself just feel those bad feelings) you start to see the good that can come out of something that seemed so bad. First, young drivers are expected to have accidents. That's why you pay higher insurance rates. There are literally millions of people under the age of 20 that have had an accidents that totaled their cars. Unfortuneately many of those accidents were caused by drinking and driving and many of them resulted in deaths and terrible injuries.

    You weren't drunk behind the wheel, speeding obliviously on a dangerous road and you didn't kill anyone, or even seriously hurt anyone, including yourself. You had a very frightening accident and totaled a car that can be replaced. But that's not the only thing that happened. You experienced something that you will never forget and that will make you a MUCH better driver, didn't you? And the whole world expects new drivers to have accidents like these. Because they do. I did. And I was a completely different driver afterwards. It made me grow up so much and I ended up being really thankful for it because if I hadn't learnt by having that accident I may have learnt a much harder way.

    Cars can be replaced and your insurance may go up and that will suck but you'll get through it. Lives can't be replaced and the experience and the growth as a result of that experience can't be replaced either, can it?

    So in reality, no matter how shitty you feel at the moment, something very good actually happened to you that you'll benefit from for the rest of your life. Money and possessions really don't mean anything. You'll get through that aspect of it and it can even serve to make the experience more useful to you.

    You're alive! The other driver's alive! Everything is going to be all right, and even better than before if you can see it that way. Be very gentle and kind to yourself, Sabine, because I know you're probably really mad at yourself right now. That's fine. Be as mad as you need to be but give yourself a time limit and when it's up give yourself the loving kindness, compassion and forgiveness you deserve as a human being. K? I'm sending you big, big, gentle hugs through cyber space all the way from Canada.

    All my love,
    Boo
  • SabineSabine Veteran
    edited October 2006
    Thanks everybody. It's great to come home from school and look forward to talking to you all ^_^
    Today was a little better - I got hit in the forehead with a shuttlecock in badminton today, but I laughed, so I guess the old me's slooooowly coming back :tongue2:

    I'm going to be under close observation tomorrow, because a few of my teachers noticed that I was a bit spacey in class today - they think I might have a slight concussion :eek2: Hopefully not - I haven't been nauseated or extremely tired, but my eyesight's been a little blurred.
    ...Or maybe I just need to change contacts...hrm. :winkc:

    I saw the car yesterday afternoon at the towing yard place, and it was just appalling how bad the passenger side looked. Whew! I managed to salvage my umbrella from the backseat...and that was about it, everything else was wedged under the door...

    But thank you all for being there for me. Things will get better!
    *group hug!*
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