The intolerable need to be occupied

betaboy

Why is there this intolerable urge to be occupied at all times, even during sleep (which is probably why we dream)?

Some people say it's the result of modern society with its comforts. Others say it's human nature. Even monks are occupied with something or the other (chanting, meditation, reading suttas etc.) - it is like falling into an abyss, this unoccupied state.

What are your ideas on this?

federica

I don't have a problem, personally, with being unoccupied..... but I think silence is a taboo subject!

I find that if two people are in a room, and there's a lull in conversation, one of them always seems to feel they need to break the silence.

Silence, or lack of discussion, seems to leave people uncomfortable. And it's true... shops and public places invariably have piped music.... why do we fear silence so much?

Tosh

federica said:

. why do we fear silence so much?

Maybe if we don't keep our brains busy, our mind attacks us?

federica

I don't know what the hell it is.... but we are constantly bombarded by noise....

I remember going out for a walk with my dog, many years ago. it was early one morning, in the depths of winter. we had just had a full night's snow-fall and everything was covered 'in a freshly-fallen, silent shroud of snow'.... and out in the countryside, miles from traffic, the silence was both deafening and blissful... even yelling at my dog to return, my voice sounded muffled, and his galloping back to me, soundless.... I was both exhilarated and amazed by the experience....
Now, as I suffer from constant 24/7 tinnitus, I would kill to have that experience again....

how

@federica
My tinnitus started after camping on a small island far away from civilization where I spent many days just blissfully lapping up the silence.
A researcher working with tinnitus said a number of her colleagues believe that tinnitus is just the side effect of our brain searching for sound vibrations that we are no longer able to hear. That it often gets reported as being noticeable immediately after damaging noise or after an unaccustomed silence.

federica

I hate to go off-topic, but briefly, I have no recollection of when it began, or why. I know my father had it. I am also developing Hyperacusis - an audial intolerance of certain noises. So I will never know peaceful silence again, because AFAIK, Tinnitus is incurable.

Back to topic, can discuss in PM's if you wish.

Jeffrey

It's craving. Craving for sense pleasures. Craving for stimulus. Craving for existence and non-existence.

vinlyn

I had a close colleague who had tinnitus, and while it was never cured, she saw tremendous improvement via acupuncture.

how

Our conditioned manipulations of phenomena is a deliberated activity where as
meditation is simply no longer empowering that activity.

The stimulation that we receive from our activity based existence obscures the real cause of our suffering where as in the absence of that obscuring stimulation we are forced to face the underlying reality that threatens the validity of our own identity.

Lii

I think it has to do with our training, which also encourages us to have expectations.

anataman

betaboy said:

Why is there this intolerable urge to be occupied at all times, even during sleep (which is probably why we dream)?

Some people say it's the result of modern society with its comforts. Others say it's human nature. Even monks are occupied with something or the other (chanting, meditation, reading suttas etc.) - it is like falling into an abyss, this unoccupied state.

What are your ideas on this?

What else is there to do in a world of change and activity? Other than to change and be active.

banned_crab

Because when you sit still and silent its scary. You feel vulnerable. Its like you are finally aware of being in space.

Dakini

federica said:

I don't have a problem, personally, with being unoccupied..... but I think silence is a taboo subject!

I find that if two people are in a room, and there's a lull in conversation, one of them always seems to feel they need to break the silence.

Silence, or lack of discussion, seems to leave people uncomfortable. And it's true... shops and public places invariably have piped music.... why do we fear silence so much?

I don't think this is by any means universal. I think it predominates in American culture, this need to fill the void of silence with chatter. But not everyone is like that, mercifully. I enjoy silent drives around the countryside with friends. People who are comfortable with each other don't have the need to chatter all the time. And in Scandinavian culture, it's common to allow lulls in the conversation, or to share silent activities with friends.

OP, get used to meditating twice a day. Expand gradually on the time you devote to each session. This will increase your appreciation of quietude.

seeker242

"Monks, these two extremes ought not to be practiced by one who has gone forth from the household life. (What are the two?) There is addiction to indulgence of sense-pleasures, which is low, coarse, the way of ordinary people, unworthy, and unprofitable; and there is addiction to self-mortification, which is painful, unworthy, and unprofitable.

"Avoiding both these extremes, the Tathagata (The Perfect One) has realized the Middle Path; it gives vision, gives knowledge, and leads to calm, to insight, to enlightenment and to Nibbana. And what is that Middle Path realized by the Tathagata...? It is the Noble Eightfold path, and nothing else

It's the natural behavior of "ordinary people".