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How do I let insults go without experiencing anger
HamsakagoosewhispererPolishing the 'just so'Veteran
@heyimacrab said:
Ive noticed that subconsciously these people who spread anger can somehow sense the way I feel. When I feel vulnerable or angry than I sure enough get into something with them. Its not some super sticious crazy idea, its actually true. When I feel loving and forgiving I find that these people act differently. I am also able to suppress other peoples anger by feeling loving or forgiving. I dont even have to say anything to them, i just have to feel it.
Amen brother. This is a wisdom realization, good for you
It's perfectly explainable, in that one's inner state of mind is also one's outer state of being, with all the bells and whistles to back it up.
I have a troublesome coworker and recently realized together we played this out.
Remember it is the ENERGY (or whatever you want to call it) that you allow through, and not some "you" or "I" creating and delivering the goods. The kindness energy is already there, always running through you, and you just get out of it's way.
The same is true going the opposite direction, from them to you.
If the constricted angry 'energy' comes at you from another, you KNOW it and pause, knowing it. You can see it and feel it BUT a choice of how to REACT to it is all yours. You still may have hairs standing on your neck but what comes out of your mouth in words is 100% your choice. Eventually your body language will follow suit as you continue to practice responding to negative stuff.
We lay folks don't seem to have much in the way of control over instinct in early practice. Anger is met with defensive anger before we even know what the hell is happening. With practice, you may still have the instinctual defense in your body, but your 'automatic' reaction is a rush of calming or kindness. You can do this even while your body is alive with adrenaline. Eventually (I'm supposing, not there yet myself) the body's instinctual response will be blunted in favor of concern and calm rather than arousal.
@heyimacrab totally makes sense. We are an extension of our most inner workings, and what we project to the world is a reflection of what is going on inside. People definitely can pick up on that and respond accordingly. Also, I think it's often very obvious when a person has been studying the Dharma for a long time. I notice a very palpable difference in senior students (along with monks and masters of course). A person who lives the Dharma is easy to pick out in a crowd simply based on how others feel and act around them. That includes people who are practicing their beliefs in a manner that is consistent with the Dharma even if they aren't actually Buddhists, in my experience.
Comments
Amen brother. This is a wisdom realization, good for you
It's perfectly explainable, in that one's inner state of mind is also one's outer state of being, with all the bells and whistles to back it up.
I have a troublesome coworker and recently realized together we played this out.
Remember it is the ENERGY (or whatever you want to call it) that you allow through, and not some "you" or "I" creating and delivering the goods. The kindness energy is already there, always running through you, and you just get out of it's way.
The same is true going the opposite direction, from them to you.
If the constricted angry 'energy' comes at you from another, you KNOW it and pause, knowing it. You can see it and feel it BUT a choice of how to REACT to it is all yours. You still may have hairs standing on your neck but what comes out of your mouth in words is 100% your choice. Eventually your body language will follow suit as you continue to practice responding to negative stuff.
We lay folks don't seem to have much in the way of control over instinct in early practice. Anger is met with defensive anger before we even know what the hell is happening. With practice, you may still have the instinctual defense in your body, but your 'automatic' reaction is a rush of calming or kindness. You can do this even while your body is alive with adrenaline. Eventually (I'm supposing, not there yet myself) the body's instinctual response will be blunted in favor of concern and calm rather than arousal.
Just let it go.
@heyimacrab totally makes sense. We are an extension of our most inner workings, and what we project to the world is a reflection of what is going on inside. People definitely can pick up on that and respond accordingly. Also, I think it's often very obvious when a person has been studying the Dharma for a long time. I notice a very palpable difference in senior students (along with monks and masters of course). A person who lives the Dharma is easy to pick out in a crowd simply based on how others feel and act around them. That includes people who are practicing their beliefs in a manner that is consistent with the Dharma even if they aren't actually Buddhists, in my experience.