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Analyzing your intentions
Howdy
I have been thinking about something for a while... I read the blog of a woman with whom I have absolutely nothing in common. We disagree on almost everything (I say almost because we both believe that organic food is better for the body and that exercise is good).
My husband and I were talking about it tonight, and he asked me (and I thought at almost the same time), "why do you read this blog?" I honestly don't know.
I started reading it because I wanted tips on keeping a clean and organized home while being very busy, and found her blog when searching on the internet. At that time, she was posting a lot about it, and I did get some valuable information. Now, the tone has changed a lot, and I still read.
I was thinking about what my intentions are for reading this blog. Why? What motivates me? What do I get out of it? The only question of those I can answer is the last one -- not much. Dislike for that kind of "Christian" who hates feminism, gays, government, anybody who is not a born-again Christian, but loves the war. Not very satisfying.
Can you help me come up with some ways of thinking about this? Maybe those questions can help me think about other things I do...
I am tempted to blame it on my OCD... something I have struggled with for most of my life, but that is not necessarily honest. :-/
I have been thinking about something for a while... I read the blog of a woman with whom I have absolutely nothing in common. We disagree on almost everything (I say almost because we both believe that organic food is better for the body and that exercise is good).
My husband and I were talking about it tonight, and he asked me (and I thought at almost the same time), "why do you read this blog?" I honestly don't know.
I started reading it because I wanted tips on keeping a clean and organized home while being very busy, and found her blog when searching on the internet. At that time, she was posting a lot about it, and I did get some valuable information. Now, the tone has changed a lot, and I still read.
I was thinking about what my intentions are for reading this blog. Why? What motivates me? What do I get out of it? The only question of those I can answer is the last one -- not much. Dislike for that kind of "Christian" who hates feminism, gays, government, anybody who is not a born-again Christian, but loves the war. Not very satisfying.
Can you help me come up with some ways of thinking about this? Maybe those questions can help me think about other things I do...
I am tempted to blame it on my OCD... something I have struggled with for most of my life, but that is not necessarily honest. :-/
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Comments
It's funny you bring this up because I used to read a far right, conservative blog a few years ago and no matter how angry it sometimes made me I always went back. I asked myself the same question you're asking; why am I subjecting myself to this? What's my payoff?
After some soul searching I realized that I was getting a "You're an idiot and you're so wrong whereas I'm right" fix from it. Not very healthy on my part. I was so vested in my left wing opinions that I needed to feed them and going into the lion's den gave me a perverse sort of pleasure, like I was undermining him simply through my presence and watchful eye. I never left him any comments, probably because part of my enjoyment depended on my being a safe distance from him in order to judge him in peace.
When I realized what I was doing and how it was feeding not only my righteous indignation but also my anger and suffering for no good reason, I stopped reading it for good. I was relieved when I made that decision but it also made me want to be more aware of why I do other things as well, even if that meant uncovering things I didn't particularly like about myself. So since then I've tried to ask myself the harder questions and it's good. Uncomfortable at times, but good. I am only human after all. I can forgive myself these things and I can't change anything if I don't acknowledge it first.
It doesn't really sound to me like you're doing what I was doing but I couldn't help telling you that story since we both started asking ourselves the question about intention after reading a right wing blog. If you ask yourself what your payoff is for reading that blog you'll probably find the answer. And Magwang is totally right; meditate. Meditation is the only way to gain access to the real deep stuff we have locked away inside.
Great question, Synchro. And it's nice to see you again.
I read "somewhere" that God is love-I don't remember any mention of war....
To see a very stupid and smug man say it's His Job to decide things?
I do the same exact thing. I am a Libertarian. I consider myself fairly conservative on economic issues, but I am extremely liberal on social issues.
I listen to people like Anne Coulter and Michael Savage. I detest them but I find it fascinating to listen to them if only for the sake of strengthening my own viewpoints and strengthen my notion that modern conservatives are backwards, delusional, war mongers. They throw around words like 'freedom' more than any other people, and yet under their rule, you are sent off to war to die for a pointless cause, church and state are united, you are arrested for owning a plant, and you can't marry certain people just because of their sex.
Let freedom ring?
sorry, STP, once again your depth of knowledge has just drowned me.:crazy:
I'm lost.
Q: How do you know when you're a Pirate?
A: You just ARRRRRRRRR! :pirate:
*big grin*
Yer funny, bro. That's a good one!! I love it!!