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I have started meditating again

comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
edited February 2008 in Sanghas
Well the title says it all. I have been spending time meditating again. I have noticed that my anger and violent nature are coming down more and more everyday. With all the crap I have been going through with my soon to be ex wife my negative emotions are starting to suppress. I have been focusing on my goals and my positive emotions. The real test will be when I go see my kids and have to run in with the ex. I am hoping to be able to suppress the negative emotions enough to get through it all.

Comments

  • SimonthepilgrimSimonthepilgrim Veteran
    edited January 2008
    Well the title says it all. I have been spending time meditating again. I have noticed that my anger and violent nature are coming down more and more everyday. With all the crap I have been going through with my soon to be ex wife my negative emotions are starting to suppress. I have been focusing on my goals and my positive emotions. The real test will be when I go see my kids and have to run in with the ex. I am hoping to be able to suppress the negative emotions enough to get through it all.


    First of all, Comic, be sure of the love and support that is here for you - however insufficient it may be. Meeting up with the ex- is always a bitter moment in the early days and seeing the kids can be heart-breaking.

    If I had any advice, it would be to prepare yourself in a number of ways:
    * Meditation: Apply the KISS principle. Use the time simply to quiet your thoughts, still your body and allow your breath to drop into your hara. Do not try to be clever or 'advanced'. As thoughts, feelings, imaginings, etc., arise, just notice them, with benevolent equanimity, and pass on, bringing your attention back to your breath. The advantage of this method is that we develop the ability to notice and pass right along - no suppression or clinging. Building this as a habit will help at your meeting.

    * Remember the AA acronym HALT. Avoid Hunger, Anger, Loneliness and Tiredness as far as possible. Eat simply but well for at least ten days before your meeting; sleep well; keep away from situations that annoy you (traffic jams, supermarkets, etc) as much as possible; get together with friends or neighbours.

    * If possible, get out into the open air as much as you can.

    * Prepare something to do when you get back from your meeting which is not just the sofa and TV!

    You know that you have been in my thoughts and prayers.

  • comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
    edited January 2008
    Thanks Simon. I will see them at the end of February so hopefully I will be prepared.
  • edited January 2008
    when mine became my ex. I took up "Moving Meditation".... .. "Tai chi!"
    its relaxing and tones the body too................peace be with you.
  • BrigidBrigid Veteran
    edited February 2008
    Can I copy that for my own use, Simon? Such wonderful advice! I especially liked the last one:
    * Prepare something to do when you get back from your meeting which is not just the sofa and TV!
  • SimonthepilgrimSimonthepilgrim Veteran
    edited February 2008
    Brigid wrote: »
    Can I copy that for my own use, Simon? Such wonderful advice! I especially liked the last one:

    You honour me, Boo. This has become my rule of life.
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