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Relationships.....
Does anyone else have problem when it comes to relationships, the fact that most people are not interested in dharma or meditations. Has anyone else found it hard to find someone who has same intrerests as you. Or can discuss things like sprituality with?
any buddhist dating sites?
jokes lol
any buddhist dating sites?
jokes lol 0
Comments
http://www.buddhistconnect.com/site/
http://www.mybuddhistfriends.com/
http://www.agreaterdate.com/Categories/Buddhist-Dating.htm
No Joke.
My partner isn't Buddhist per se (although his Facebook Profile states he is) but he has never been an impediment or block to my practising.
The real problem comes if you 'team up' with a devoted Christian.....
Then, at one point or another, it might get difficult!
I can understand your plight. Except for me, I can't find many girls interested in History (my favorite hobby and college major).
"What do you mean you don't wanna hear me talk about Civil War cavalry tactics? You're weird!" :rolleyes:
Maybe you don't need your partners to be buddhist as such, maybe there are certain qualities you are looking for that would make your search easier.
I mean, personally I don't want to be with anyone who drinks or smokes and I want them to be spiritual and respect my buddhist values. They don't actually have to be buddhist and considering I think we make up only 2% of the UK population (I'm not sure what it is in Canada but think you're probably not in the majority - lol) so you'd give yourself more chance to meet someone.
Otherwise I guess you need to mix in buddhist circles and go to social events as much as you can.
Take care,
Now the problem is that most people associated with public dharma centers are completely insane and incapable of real human relationships, but your mileage may vary.
Good luck. If you do what you love, have a heartfelt aspiration to find a partner to support you in your dharma pursuits and don't relax your standards out of loneliness you are bound to succeed over time.
Metta,
Namgyal
lol.
In my yoga class noone speaks to anyone before or after and throughout the class they do anything to avoid friendly eye contact.
And then the 'namastes' and thanks etc at the end of what is actually a very good class seem rather silly.
Yeah, these pale and interesting types really get my goat
LOL same in my yoga class. In all my (former) years of involvement with Buddhist groups - as a young single man - I never came anywhere close to meeting a 'suitable' female. There were plenty of young single females around, an abundance in fact, but... dunno...
...all way too busy getting into the heavy "guru-worship religion thing" and telling me I should be celibate. The girls seemed very 'driven', something of the untouchable 'communist cadre' vibe about them.
I wish I did have a partner who I could share my path with but not having one at least restricts the amount of bulls**t I am able to foist on the world, which can't be a bad thing ultimately.
See, just and I alone already make 2
Good luck - you will find someone - I just think probably in a more normal setting where you get to see their values in action, not just see them live out what are essentially rituals. You only get to see a bit of a theoretic, one-dimensional view of people.
A bit like picking up a Christian at a funeral and thinking "oo great, a nice church going lass" when it's the only time she's probably been, since her christening
I'd better not. My wife would kill me. Yes, knit-your-muesli types. She's not one of those for which I'm grateful.
For dharma on-line dating, look at dharmamatch.com (or something close to that, if I have it wrong). I cannot recommend it because I have no experience with it.
My personal view is that to focus on practice is more important rather than longing to find the ideal relationship. I also found after divorce and another failed relationship myself, that actually I was much happier on my own. I'm not suggesting that others should give up relationships though, but it can be a surprisingly rewarding alternative.
Finding a Buddhist centre or meditation class which one can visit even just occasionally is useful too.
However, sometimes we can worry too much about finding someone else before we've even started to understand ourselves.
_/\_
However, I suppose it depends on our motivation for getting into/staying in a relationship. We usually get into them because we want to be happy (a suppressed "Hah" here). My sister, however, decided to use her marriage as an accelerator to her practice. No one gets under our skin or hurts us as deeply as our partner, so she has taken to heart the verses:
"When the one whom I have benefited with great hope hurts me very badly without reason, I will learn to view that person as an excellent spiritual guide", and
"I will learn to cherish ill-natured beings and those oppressed by strong misdeeds and sufferings as if I had found a precious treasure difficult to find." (Eight Verses for Training the Mind).
The result is that, within her 42-year marriage, she has had greater opportunity to practice compassion, and to view her reactive emotions without seeking "ground", than she would have had as a single person.
My mother, on the other hand, left her husband after 30 years of marriage and was subsequently much happier and calmer. She attributed this to spiritual growth in her yoga practice. But to us kids her "buttons" seemed just as touchy ... she still got just as "unhinged" by imagined family slights as she had before her divorce. But because she had neither husband nor kids under the same roof, the frequency of irritation was diminished. She died at age 87 as attached to her emotional roller-coasters as she had been throughout my life as her daughter.
Both couplehood and singlehood have pro's and con's. I suppose if I chose to be single, I would "take the cloth", because that is the real "pro" of being single. As it is, I live with my own "Bengali tea boy" and follow my sister's example. I don't LIKE it, but I'm not here to LIKE it ... I'm here to practice. They say practice makes perfect ... here's hoping!
I enjoyed reading your post, FoibleFull. Thank you. I wish you and your sister well with your practice.
Dazzle_/\_
Samajivina Sutta
Nice to know we feel the same way, Brigid
_/\_
But I'm realising the fact they're not buddhist might be a problem... If I want to feel it on a deeper level.
I feel I may end up on a different floor of the building, shouting down the lift shaft so he can hear me.
My weird way of saying, I have a feeling anyone BUT a buddhist now might not be enough on the right wavelengh...
Hmmm...
(PS I put this elsewhere but I blogged on this last night and the link is in my signature)
You do realize that having said that you will be in love by the end of the week.
Watch out there sara. He'll meet you in the park for a nice stroll in the sun. You'll flirt and be delighted when he tells you about his connection with Buddhism. Then there's the cinema and that romantic meal in the restaurant.
"So, are you coming back to my place to see my Buddha statue, it's quite unique", he'll ask.
Then there you are facing a small porcelain figurine of a 'fat guy laughing' on his bedside table and 'prince charming' unable to understand why you are heading for the door in a huff. :rolleyes:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Did you experience this? It's kind of detailed
Excellent. I will be on my guard from now on lol