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Uncommon Courtesy
Tonight, me and a buddy of mine went to dinner with two girls we know well from high school. They were nice and all, but one thing stuck out to both of us as particularly irksome. Both of these girls kept receiving/sending text messages and then bringing up their content in the dinner conversation.
After a short time, my buddy and I were both ready to clock the [male] fellow on the other end of these text messages.
I don't know why there is no stigma against this kind of rude behavior. Imagine if I had gone to dinner and brought a book with me! But even worse, I would continually bring up the subject matter of the book and talk about the characters! It would be asinine and rightly labeled as rude.
But to sit at a dinner table with somebody and then proceed to focus all your attention on someone who is not even present is considered okay?
I may be slugglishly climbing out of the 19th century, but I still can't see how this kind of behavior can ever be justified.
After a short time, my buddy and I were both ready to clock the [male] fellow on the other end of these text messages.
I don't know why there is no stigma against this kind of rude behavior. Imagine if I had gone to dinner and brought a book with me! But even worse, I would continually bring up the subject matter of the book and talk about the characters! It would be asinine and rightly labeled as rude.
But to sit at a dinner table with somebody and then proceed to focus all your attention on someone who is not even present is considered okay?
I may be slugglishly climbing out of the 19th century, but I still can't see how this kind of behavior can ever be justified.
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Comments
Personally what irks me most is people answering their phone for dumb things at a restaurant and staying seated while talking to them for a 5-10 minute conversation.
It also amazes me how they discuss the most private of things, seemingly unaware that half of the building can clearly hear what they are saying.
It just seems as though the texting bonanza in society exploded out of nowhere and just skipped the stage where some form of etiquette is attached to it. It's really maddening.
I see people actually talking on their phones much less during social events (which is a slight relief), but this is only because they have substituted it with texting instead.
I would rightly be viewed as insane or at least disturbed if I carried on conversations with an imaginary friend at a dinner table of peers. But is what they're doing any different really? They are carrying on long, drawn-out conversations with someone whom I can't see, so it may as well be an imaginary friend.
Also, it makes me nervous because how do I know they aren't talking about me? It would be similar if I were to sit there hunched over a notebook constantly writing things throughout the course of the date. Am I taking notes on them? Am I writing about them? It would surely drive them mad. :rolleyes:
I once saw 4 people in a car, all talking on their mobile 'phones! Obviously, they had nothing to say to each other of any interest!!
I work in a shop, and I quietly refuse to serve anyone who stands infront of me, piling things on the counter for me to cash through, but who's busy wittering on about something inane to whoever...
They then wave a hand at me, as a signal to cash up, but I ignore it.
I don't like to interrupt, you see.....;)
But I have to admit, it would never entewr my head to behave like this with anyone, so when they do it with me - :mad:
I'm 100% behind you on this.
It's just so odd. Why hang out with people when you're only going to talk to someone else who is not even there?
I still think the worst thing about it is when people bring up whatever matter they are discussing in the texts. How am I supposed to contribute to a conversation like that? I had half a mind to take the accursed devices and toss them across the room. At least it would bring the focus back to the people actually present.
It took me almost 20 years to finally break down and get a cellular device, but I never take it with me in public events like dinner. And I still rank texting high on the list of social evils currently plaguing my generation. It instills poor grammar, non-existent punctuation, and a general lack of focus on the present moment and the people actually in your life.
So when two people are legitimately together in each other's presence, they feel awkward because they aren't communicating with one another by texting.
I once saw someone texting while waiting in line to observe the casket at a wake. Had I been related to the deceased, I would have destroyed the phone and made a scene.
I agree. I think I might prefer having dinner with someone who is smoking. At least their attention would be with their surroundings.
my brother was in a queue at a hardware store, with just two guys behind the counter, on a busy saturday.
The phone kept ringing, they kept answering it, and dealing with the person's query.
people in the shop were getting mightily peed off...
The 'phone then rang again, and much to everyone's annoyance, one of the assistants answered it - yet again.
The irritation was short lived however, as my brother said in loud and strident tones;
"Hello? I'm calling you from the f**king queue that's built up infront of your counter. Could you leave the fu**king phone off the hook for a fu**ing minute and deal with the people who've actually made the effort to come in and are standing waiting for some service?!?" Thank you!" And he hung up.
The guy's jaw hit the floor, as all the irate customers burst into spontaneous applause.
the phone stayed off the hook......;)
Haha. It's my dream to do something heroic like that some time. One day, there's just going to be a perfect storm; a bad day at work, illness, relationship problems, or maybe a combination of all of them. I'll already be on the brink of madness...and then somebody is going to start texting while I'm talking. It's gunna be an ugly scene.
~nomad
I used to travel to a town from where I lived, to teach Qi Gong.
It was an evening class, so I'd be coming home late.
Even though the road I travelled was the one and only route back and forth, it was through countryside, and pretty much deserted. it was also unlit, all the way (rural France is like this!) One night, I came across a couple in a ditch.
She was heavily pregnant.
No mobile 'phone.
They'd been there nearly an hour, and nobody had passed, at that time of night.
I'd say a mobile 'phone would have been a handy thing then....
Fortunately, I had one.
Within 15 minutes, someone had arrived to help haul them out of the ditch.
Nobody had missed them, they'd gone out just for the heck of going for a drive, to visit a friend, and were on their way back home.
It was a freezing night....
All the time I was with them, and all the time they were hauling the car out, not one other vehicle passed.
So if I hadn't gone by, goodness only knows how much longer they would have been stuck there.....
I understand what you're saying. But for every inspiring story like this, there are probably twenty people who kill themselves because they are texting while driving.
My issue isn't really with cell phones as much. I mean even I grudgingly own one now because of work. It's the texting that I think is ridiculous and rude.
I always have my mobile with me, but in company, I turn it off.
When I head back to my car, I turn it back on again.....
I'm agreeing with your objections, completely.
My girlfriend tells me that I'm clueless a lot, but when did I become a woman?
~nomad (is a guy)
Hahaha.
I'm sorry, of course you are, how stupid of me!
That was a careless mistake to make, and I apologise.:o
(But I still think the aqua frock looks better than the full-length yellow dress......):p
No sweat
~nomad
Resistance is futile.