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Buddhism Without Beliefs
buddhafoot
Veteran
There is a book I'm really enjoying called Buddhism Without Beliefs by Stephen Batchelor.
Since this book has copyright - I can't, in good conscience, post clips from the book without the author's permission. So, I will try to paraphrase.
There is a chapter called Awareness.
He tells a personal story of how one day he went to the refridgerator and there was no milk. So, he went to the story - and went into great detail of everything involved in going to the store. Upon returning, the only evidence he had that he could tell he actually went to the store was because he now had cold milk at home.
He was talking about how, during this trip, he had been engrossed remembering something that someone had said to him. How much this thing that was said, bothered him and angered him. He talked about how he had an imaginary conversation with this person in his head during his walk - how he came up with really acidic or hurtful things to say to this person if this conversation ever happened again. How he thought about pinning this person to the floor or even punching them in the face.
During his walk to the store - he missed the chill autumn air, the crispness of the leaves, gusts of wind, pulling his coat tighter around his neck for warmth because he was caught up in something from the past.
He was also saying how much of our time is spent like this. How at times we are not in control of our lives. That we spend a lot of time being driven by a multitude of impulses. How there are times that we do notice this - but soon get caught up in the thrashing of impulses once again.
He stated that "awareness" is making sure to remember things. Remembering what is often forgotten or ignored. How we live in this human shell and miss so many opportunities to smell, taste, breathe and feel and how these senses become dull in ourselves.
He then goes onto say that while he considers himself a caring and compassionate person - in "real" life - the day to day things - he finds that he wants to punch this person in the face.
He said that at this point, thinks of what to do with this hatred or anger. He represses it - but it's not out of caring for what this person said to him - but because of how he would be perceived by other people. This being an attachment to "self-image".
How we may even learn to deal with this by seeking a therapist and discussing it. And how it may even work for a bit - but then the anger will rear it's ugly head again. And how acting on this anger after awhile may require larger doses of anger to be able to rid himself of it.
He states that this sort of restlessness is like an primate swinging from a tree and crashing through the leaves. When it seizes us, we want nothing more than to get rid of it. When we can't see it - we want nothing more than to see it. And instead of focusing on much more relavant issues - he finds his mind straying to recall the name of John Bonham.
Finally, before discussing meditation, he states that instead of fighting it - we should embrace it. To recognize that we are or he is easily distracted. And how by accepting this anger and embracing it - there might be a chance for understanding. Instead of trying to repress it, hide it or bury it for later revival.
Even though this is a book for, I believe, aetheists - and some of it can get pretty wordy - there are real life examples that I found happening in my own life - how I deal with things - what one can do to remove these obstables or at least deal with them. "Real life" stuff instead of heady philosophical stuff.
Good book.
Michael
P.S. I hope this wasn't somewhat disjointed. You see... I'm working on work and installing Windows XP on a box that crashed and I am a little.... distracted.
Since this book has copyright - I can't, in good conscience, post clips from the book without the author's permission. So, I will try to paraphrase.
There is a chapter called Awareness.
He tells a personal story of how one day he went to the refridgerator and there was no milk. So, he went to the story - and went into great detail of everything involved in going to the store. Upon returning, the only evidence he had that he could tell he actually went to the store was because he now had cold milk at home.
He was talking about how, during this trip, he had been engrossed remembering something that someone had said to him. How much this thing that was said, bothered him and angered him. He talked about how he had an imaginary conversation with this person in his head during his walk - how he came up with really acidic or hurtful things to say to this person if this conversation ever happened again. How he thought about pinning this person to the floor or even punching them in the face.
During his walk to the store - he missed the chill autumn air, the crispness of the leaves, gusts of wind, pulling his coat tighter around his neck for warmth because he was caught up in something from the past.
He was also saying how much of our time is spent like this. How at times we are not in control of our lives. That we spend a lot of time being driven by a multitude of impulses. How there are times that we do notice this - but soon get caught up in the thrashing of impulses once again.
He stated that "awareness" is making sure to remember things. Remembering what is often forgotten or ignored. How we live in this human shell and miss so many opportunities to smell, taste, breathe and feel and how these senses become dull in ourselves.
He then goes onto say that while he considers himself a caring and compassionate person - in "real" life - the day to day things - he finds that he wants to punch this person in the face.
He said that at this point, thinks of what to do with this hatred or anger. He represses it - but it's not out of caring for what this person said to him - but because of how he would be perceived by other people. This being an attachment to "self-image".
How we may even learn to deal with this by seeking a therapist and discussing it. And how it may even work for a bit - but then the anger will rear it's ugly head again. And how acting on this anger after awhile may require larger doses of anger to be able to rid himself of it.
He states that this sort of restlessness is like an primate swinging from a tree and crashing through the leaves. When it seizes us, we want nothing more than to get rid of it. When we can't see it - we want nothing more than to see it. And instead of focusing on much more relavant issues - he finds his mind straying to recall the name of John Bonham.
Finally, before discussing meditation, he states that instead of fighting it - we should embrace it. To recognize that we are or he is easily distracted. And how by accepting this anger and embracing it - there might be a chance for understanding. Instead of trying to repress it, hide it or bury it for later revival.
Even though this is a book for, I believe, aetheists - and some of it can get pretty wordy - there are real life examples that I found happening in my own life - how I deal with things - what one can do to remove these obstables or at least deal with them. "Real life" stuff instead of heady philosophical stuff.
Good book.
Michael
P.S. I hope this wasn't somewhat disjointed. You see... I'm working on work and installing Windows XP on a box that crashed and I am a little.... distracted.
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Comments
I do the 'conversations in the head' thing too. Now I try to have nice conversations and tell myself constantly, 'that person is only human, like me'. Much healthier. No face punching now...
I am gonna go buy this book, I laughed so hard reading your post because it describes exactly what I used to be like. Good one Michael.
The conversation thing? I do it all the time.
I find that in many instances it does work to constantly go over conversations or arguments in one's head. Because the next time it happens - you're prepared and you can really make some great points, say hurtful things, but in a truthful manner, all kind of junk.
But, how much time was I dwelling on things that were not positive to the internal me? Not a lot. I was too busy going over things that hurt me in the past instead of living in the "now" and enjoying life.
Michael
I do not know if this is quite....on topic, but--If you feel the impulse explore the Monkeysphere! (Warning there is some rated R language so parental discretion is advised.) http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/monkeysphere.html
Michael
Sometimes I'll be playing a really cool song on the old MP3 player, and start thinking about something else. Since I'm a fan of metal, some of these songs can be 10 minutes long, and I didn't really hear a note of it. My mind has been doing something else the whole time. I've been this way my whole life. The monkey mind can take over quite easily and I go through my day like this. At work, I really try not to let the monkey mind take over while I'm doing a task as it can hurt someone.
Maybe one day I will finish the book as this part is the last chapter I read. I am in no hurry to finish it as I like the author's style and that he admits to being agnostic and Buddhist. The most honest philosophical answer he can make. Plus it's great to relax to after working all night and there are other books I'm reading at the same time.
I enjoyed his little stories about Steve? I believe that was the persons name - or how things affect us (like when someone is snippy with us) and then how our mind goes crazy on us.
I know this is how it works for me. I can replay entire conversations - either conversations I've had or conversations I expect to have - in my mind. And all of these conversations do nothing but upset me.
But, I am finding ways to deal with these traits and that god damned monkey.
-bf
I had a coworker make a comment to the effect that I'm lazy the other night. I was furious. One thing I'm not is lazy. I am having to learn my limits since I've just come back to work. But I did something unthinking, and this nurse picked up the slack. The person she "helped" didn't ask for it or want it. A nurse's aide. I ended up talking to a few people as the best way to approach the woman as she can be a tad nasty at times. We cleared up the situation and I apologized for my wrongdoing in the matter. That's all I could do.
One thing I do when the monkey isn't in control is try to think where the other person is coming from. They have thoughts, feelings, and traits such as I. I don't know why that person is driving like they do. But I can control my anger towards them. I do find it harder with face to face confrontations and you have to continue to see the person. I work 12 hour shifts and if one of my coworkers tick me off, I have to deal with it. Otherwise, my night can go pretty bad. Just my 2 cents worth.
Zenmonk---what happened when you met him that gave you this opinion?
As I see it half the Buddhism thing is about money making. But lets get realist here we all comply to market forces whether we like it or not.
Now remember folks http://stores.ebay.com/snafuzafus
HH
I think that an opinion was posted and that should be okay, shouldn't it? I believe that ZM was asked for his opinion.
I may have missed the whole point maybe...
HH,
I thought you point was actually catchy and amusing.
It's not like ZM is gouging people for his products. I'm very happy with what I've received from him.
-bf