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How Do You Handle Temptations?

YogaMamaYogaMama
edited July 2005 in Buddhism Basics
When you are faced with something tempting, that you know is either not good for you or good for your Buddhist Practice, how do you handle that? Just wanted to get some ideas on how to handle certain situations! Thanks in advance!

Kim

Comments

  • _BeautifulSpringtime_BeautifulSpringtime Veteran
    edited July 2005
    That same way that you thoughts are not our own - your temptations are not your own.

    It is up to 'us' to either hold onto these thoughts/temptations or simply let them go...
  • comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
    edited July 2005
    I usually give in and then feel bad afterwards. :(
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited July 2005
    comicallyinsane wrote:
    I usually give in and then feel bad afterwards. :(

    Yea, sometimes I do too! That is why I am searching for a better way! :)
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited July 2005
    *BeautifulSpringtimeFist* wrote:
    That same way that you thoughts are not our own - your temptations are not your own.

    It is up to 'us' to either hold onto these thoughts/temptations or simply let them go...

    That confuses me a little.....if these thoughts are not my own, then who's are they?? :confused: So once you have these thoughts, how are you able to just let them go? Is that something that gets easier with practice and more meditation? Do you focus your mind on something else when these thoughts arise?
  • comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
    edited July 2005
    Yeah BSF, spill the beans.
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited July 2005
    Yea, what he said!
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited July 2005
    I've been putting into practice some of the things I've been reading.

    For a certain "craving" that I have - I just "accept" it. I recognize that I have this craving - and I go meditate. I've tried to stop "feeling bad" or "weak" for having this craving. I've tried to stop thinking that "I have do to something about this craving." I recognize that I do have it and that it will pass.

    It's odd. Instead of feeling like I have to do something about it - if I just relax, recognize it for what it is - I find that it's not such a driving force as I was thinking it was.

    I don't know if this makes much sense - but I just stop, recognize it for what it is, take some deep breaths, think about it for what it is and try to come to peace in the fact that it will pass.

    Michael
    Balmy
  • comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
    edited July 2005
    Actually that makes total sense.
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited July 2005
    Makes perfect sense to me! Thanks - I am going to try that method!
  • _BeautifulSpringtime_BeautifulSpringtime Veteran
    edited July 2005
    Unfortunately I can't really say much to help you overcome temptations.

    The key is to continue your meditation practice - through this the true reality of living will become aparent.

    If this is unclear or not helpful then please PM me.

    A deep bow,

    Dave
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited July 2005
    It is very helpful...thanks! I figured I needed more meditation practice to overcome these things in life.
  • JasonJason God Emperor Arrakis Moderator
    edited July 2005
    My way of avoiding temptation is to look at my intentions first. Why am I about to do this? I also consider is it harmful? Am I stealing, lying, or something that is unwholesome? If I am able to see that I am just giving in to some desire I use will power. No matter how much it causes me to suffer I refrain from doing it. You have to just simply make up your mind to not do it. That is how I stopped drinking, smoking, doing drugs, etc. For the littler things though it is a lot harder because they slip through the cracks. You don't tend to worry about having another piece of cake or buying another movie or something silly like that. Doing tiny selfish things separately doesn't seem so bad, but when they build up and create a habit...then that's a lot bigger problem. Meditation is always good. No matter what you should try to do it as often as you can. You should also question everything! Question what you're doing, why you're doing it, will it cause harm or not? There is a point when you will be honest with yourself and admit why you are giving in to some temptation. Then the choice is all yours. You do it or you don't. At that moment you have to answer a very difficult question: is it really worth doing what I am about to do?
  • JasonJason God Emperor Arrakis Moderator
    edited July 2005
    This was said by the Lord....
    "Bhikkhus, these two bright principles protect the world. What are the two? Shame and fear of wrongdoing. If, bhikkhus, these two bright principles did not protect the world, there would not be discerned respect for mother or maternal aunt or maternal uncle's wife or a teacher's wife or the wives of other honoured persons, and the world would have fallen into promiscuity, as with goats, sheep, chickens, pigs, dogs, and jackals. But as these two bright principles protect the world, there is discerned respect for mother ... and the wives of other honoured persons."


    Those in whom shame and fear of wrong
    Are not consistently found
    Have deviated from the bright root
    And are led back to birth and death.
    But those in whom shame and fear of wrong
    Are consistently ever present,
    Peaceful, mature in the holy life,
    They put an end to renewal of being.

    ~From the Itivuttaka http://www.accesstoinsight.org/canon/sutta/khuddaka/iti/iti-a.html#42
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited July 2005
    Elohim wrote:
    There is a point when you will be honest with yourself and admit why you are giving in to some temptation. Then the choice is all yours. You do it or you don't. At that moment you have to answer a very difficult question: is it really worth doing what I am about to do?

    Excellent point, Elohim.

    Like I said earlier - I don't berate myself for feeling a craving - I accept it and try to find peace with it. This does help me cope with things in a way... but, we can't fool ourselves into thinking that giving up any sort of serious craving or addiction is going to be an easy, lollypop lined street. Ultimately... as I used to say, you have to have a "come to Jesus meetin'" with you and your head. Then - as you say - you have to ask the question to yourself...

    "is it really worth doing what I am about to do?"

    I've heard people ridicule Buddhism as being a "lazy man's religion" and I don't think that's true. In fact I think it's a tough religion or philosophical way of life. You can't say, "Oh God!, help me get over this so I can live in heaven forever!!!!!"
    When you do it in Buddhism - you're really doing it for yourself. Not for heaven, not for hell - just you.

    Michael
  • comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
    edited July 2005
    Well I got my first craving tonight. I seem to get a craving for cereal at about the same time everynight. I decided to ignore the craving and sure enough it went away. It wasn't as hard as I thoiugh it would be. I asked myself what the craving was and then I said to myself. "Do I need to give in or fight it." Then I said, "I am going to choose option C and do nothing at all". I went back to doing whatever it was I was doing and then within minutes it just faded away. :bigclap: Thanks for all the good advice everyone. :bowdown:


    I am going to do this everytime. I think this is the way to drop weight and control my eating. I am going to start applying this method to other things in my life. I have been very mindful of tasks I need to get done and so far I am doing good with improvement all the time.
  • JasonJason God Emperor Arrakis Moderator
    edited July 2005
    That's good Comic. :)
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited July 2005
    Thanks for all the great ideas, everyone.

    Elohim - I too was involved (for a very short period of time) in a life of drugs, partying and drinking and that was easier to give up then all of the smaller temptations that I am faced with every day. Like you said, when it is somehting small, you don't really think about it as much.

    Comic - I actually just read that if you have a craving, and you just hold off for about 5-10 minutes before giving into that craving, 99% of the time, it will just go away. I am glad it worked for you! And your new icon is cracking me up!
  • comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
    edited July 2005
    Did anyone ever watch Land of th Lost? :confused:
  • buddhafootbuddhafoot Veteran
    edited July 2005
    Good job, Comic.

    I know it does work for me - not all the time, but it does. At least with this method, when we do give into a craving - we know the only thing we have to do is work on ourselves. Not spend an eternity burning in flames being poked in the bum by pointy eared devils wielding pitchforks...

    Well, at least some of us...

    Michael

    P.S. I had successfully managed to forget "Land Of The Lost" - and now you've stirred up all those repressed memories... :)
  • comicallyinsanecomicallyinsane Veteran
    edited July 2005
    They are available on DVd if you want ot buy them. I hav eSeason 2 but I am looking for the rest.
  • YogaMamaYogaMama
    edited July 2005
    comicallyinsane wrote:
    Did anyone ever watch Land of th Lost? :confused:

    ME! ME! ME! That's why I said that your icon was cracking me up!!! My hubby and I often laugh about that show!
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