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I cant figure it out, so I take refuge?
I'm at a point where I realize , I can't know stuff..
it's really really lame....stuff like rebirth = literal? I feel now I need to take a leap of faith and just HOPE and believe that...... I look at my world and imagine outer space and stars and stuff...and it's just so damn odd...everything is ODD as hell... where'd it come from where's it going I want a COMPLETE PICTURE but it's sooo impossible...
So i decided I have no choice but to just, try to take the....what is it...triple refuge?
I don't feel SAFE , when I don't know how rebirth works, karma, cosmic truths etc etc... I have a need to feel SAFE, to know....to understand and since I have trouble doing that...
I'm throwing myself at the mercy of the teachings..:hrm:?
it's really really lame....stuff like rebirth = literal? I feel now I need to take a leap of faith and just HOPE and believe that...... I look at my world and imagine outer space and stars and stuff...and it's just so damn odd...everything is ODD as hell... where'd it come from where's it going I want a COMPLETE PICTURE but it's sooo impossible...
So i decided I have no choice but to just, try to take the....what is it...triple refuge?
I don't feel SAFE , when I don't know how rebirth works, karma, cosmic truths etc etc... I have a need to feel SAFE, to know....to understand and since I have trouble doing that...
I'm throwing myself at the mercy of the teachings..:hrm:?
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Comments
Whoa now. The Buddha never asked anyone to take a leap of faith in his teachings and just "hope and believe." And as for rebirth=literal, despite the wrath of Shenpen that will inevitably follow, I dare say you should look into this a bit more:
http://buddhaforum.org/viewtopic.php?f=17&t=674
http://buddhaforum.org/Rebirth_and_Parable_of_the_Arrow_about423.html
http://buddhaforum.org/viewtopic.php?f=17&t=728&start=10
The Buddha's teachings were not about "[life] after death," or about theorizing/speculating at all.
Likewise, these sorts of questions:
are not of benefit and you will find no answer in Buddhism or in taking Refuge.
What DO you know? This life. Don't waste your time speculating on what may or may not happen after death, because no one can tell you that. But if you become obsessed with finding the answer, you'll soon find out what happens first-hand, and your life will have been wasted. The Buddha's teachings are important regardless of what happens after death.
Very good.
Yes, you don't know anything except what you have experienced for yourself.
Yes, some things are a mystery. Letting go of our desperate need to 'know' and coming to the acceptance that there are more important things we should be doing is a growth spurt. It can be somewhat painful sometimes, but it's growth nonetheless.
Admitting that you don't feel safe not knowing the answers to these cosmic questions is an honest and brave realization.
Keep going. You're really getting somewhere now, TF.
Btw, I take Refuge often for the same reasons.
Hi! I'm a newbie myself, but I just wanted to chime in and say that it's absolutely normal, and well, part of the whole process, to not be certain of anything and to really challenge teachings and think about how to understand them. It's kinda the point, right? Buddha asked us not to just take his word for it but to actually practice for ourselves.
From my point of view, and from what I understand about Buddhism, issues of "where did it all come from" and "where is it going" aren't really a helpful starting place--they are interesting questions, but I'm not sure that any amount of study or contemplation is going to give you any "concrete" or reified idea of exactly what things are. I like to go back to the basics---the four noble truths. When I first read the four noble truths, I knew I had found what I was looking for.
I'm not saying contemplating mysteries isn't interesting, but I'm not sure if taking refuge will really "solve" any of the problems you are interested in knowing more about. From what I understand, leaps of faith don't apply to Buddhism. It's based on experience, practice, and observation of our own minds. I accept the four noble truths because they make sense and help me to understand how to overcome suffering. I meditate because bringing my awareness to the breath allows me to sometimes, for just a sliver of a moment, experience the "unborn awareness" that isn't reacting and is only seeing.
maybe that's my problem if i figure out the universe, maybe I will become a god and immortal and be attached to my understandings forever. Causing UNTOLD EONS OF SUFFERING... hmmm?
Nor attached to speculating what "THAT" might be.
Nah, but the fixation on the possibility that you might will surely cause UNTOLD AMOUNTS OF SUFFERING.
Now get ready to have your mind blown. Maybe you've already been there, done that. Maybe you were already a god, with a god-sized ego and intellect, with all the knowledge of the Universe, and the power of life and death at your fingertips. Perhaps your decadent god incarnation led to your next incarnation in one of the lowest hells, where you suffered horribly for untold eons, until you were reborn into the hungry ghost realm. Still you suffered miserably for many more eons, until at last you managed to rid yourself of enough Karma to wind up in the animal realm. In the animal realm, you incarnated as a worm, maybe a frog, a vulture, then perhaps a deer. Finally, you shed enough Karma to enter the human realm, the most precious of all incarnations, where you have been fortunate enough to become exposed to the teachings of Buddha, and thus have the opportunity to attain Nirvana and become liberated from the wheel of life forever.
Or maybe not. That's Buddhism for you.
But hey! Here we all are!
If you think that you are your body, it doesn’t matter if you know the exact number of the stars and where they came from, let alone where they are going, you will never feel safe.
The Buddha stood right in your shoes at one time. He started to notice things like sickness, old age, and death. (The 3 Warning Signs) (Impermanence) But he also said that he found a way to break out of this “Wrongful Identification.” He said, “Do what I did, and look directly at what you think you know (or base your not knowing on) and watch all of this ignorance melt away.
S9