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Please help this poor meditator
Hi everyone,
I have recently strated practising awareness meditation. But I find it really difficult as things are far from perfect in my life, and I lose my breath and end up focusing on the negative stuff as a focus for the meditation. It dosn't clear away it just stays in my mind and makes the meditation unbearable and I give up and walk away.
When I fist started this meditation I would sometimes attain quite a blissfull state of mind. Now when I don't acheive this I get real frustrated and it ruins my meditation. Should we meditate even when it isn't joyful?
I'm sorry everyone, please be patient with me I am just finding mindfullness so hard!
Thank you!
Stream
I have recently strated practising awareness meditation. But I find it really difficult as things are far from perfect in my life, and I lose my breath and end up focusing on the negative stuff as a focus for the meditation. It dosn't clear away it just stays in my mind and makes the meditation unbearable and I give up and walk away.
When I fist started this meditation I would sometimes attain quite a blissfull state of mind. Now when I don't acheive this I get real frustrated and it ruins my meditation. Should we meditate even when it isn't joyful?
I'm sorry everyone, please be patient with me I am just finding mindfullness so hard!
Thank you!
Stream
0
Comments
What does everyone do when you live in a noisy family enviroment also, should I concentrate on the breath as best as I can (easier said then done), or play some peaceful music.
Help for two poor meditators needed!
Meditation has changed my life for the good in a very significant way.
Sometimes metta (loving-kindness) or karuna (compassion) meditation can help in overcoming negativity.
Do not try to attain a blissful state. If it happens, that's fine, but you should not have any attachment to such states. By desiring such a state and expecting it, or trying to force attainment of it, you cause this frustration to arise when it doesn't happen.
For the noise issue, try to develop greater equanimity... if that's not enough maybe try reciting mantras. Also, consider visiting your local temple, as they usually will have a quiet place where you can sit and meditate.
However, there is nothing much you can do about it. Why not try to do some other meditation than the breath meditation like the metta or walking meditation as already suggested. Breath meditation is hard to do when you are in pain and when you have troubles in your mind. Metta meditation is a superb option in such a situation. It refreshes your mind, makes you strong emotionally.
Also, please keep in mind that, practice makes perfect. Keep at it. Meditation is not an easy thing to do sometimes and it is common to everyone here. I am sure everyone here has gone through what you are describing. If breath meditation is difficult, then just sit and be mindful of the present moment. You know, listen to the sounds outside but don’t analyze them. Just be aware of here and now. It’s very relaxing… Then if you feel you are stable at this stage, slowly drift your awareness to the breath.
Nevertheless, sometimes, 20-30 minutes into the session, something happens and there is an opening. Whatever was bothering me loses its grip and the awareness falls through, down to a less tense place. It is actually such sessions that I find most rewarding, as I get a very encouraging sense of liberation-- the goal of practice to beging with.
I think my problem is that I am just much weaker than you. The last time I succesfully meditated was at Chittvakka (A Thai Forest Monastery), because your expected to sit with the Sangha and for some reason I found that so much easier, and could meditate for three hours at a time no problem.
But I just can't sit on my own for any lengh of time with all these demons arising in my mind I am just not strong enough.
Stronger? Well, I haven't been strong enough to travel anywhere for practice! I've always led very a comfortable, sedentary life.
Hope things get better for you!
Can relate to this too. I also find it much easier to meditate in a group although I haven't done it a lot. If there is a possibility of it, why don't you join a class?
http://www.mahasati.org/learn_to_meditate.html#anchor703866
I immediately thought of something someone I know does. She calls her friend, they put the phone down, and they meditate. When the timer goes off they pick up the phone, check in, and hang up. That way they have the sense that they are meditating with someone even though they are alone in the room.
Could something like this be helpful? Just a thought
Dear Stream
You are in Portsmouth. Perhaps you might find Ajahn Sumedho's teachings interesting. He can be found on Forest Sangha or at Amaravati. Chithurst Buddhist Monastery is also possible.
In short, yes meditate even when it isn't joyful. True meditation in the Buddhist sense is not about attaining any particular state or state of mind, it is about clarity, seeing things for what they are.
Take heart, everyone 'seems' to struggle at the beginning, but to continue is very very important.
With best wishes, and hopes for a good journey for you.
Abu
Entirely untrue. To meditate, through all conditions of mind, is unexcelled bravery. It is probably a good idea to sit daily for a short time, this can orientate you to the conditions of meditation. You are much stronger than your emotions..everyone has these things in their mind, but only few face them and see them for what they are. It is possible though. You are not alone.
Remember: meditation is not about achieving or keeping any particular state or state of mind. Eightfold path, kindness, meditation. Perseverance, determination.
Best wishes.
Abu,
Thank you for that. Yes I find Ajahn Sumedho very interesting and listen to his dhamma talks online when I can. I have visited Chithurst and stayed as a guest twice now. A wonderful experience as the Venerable Ajahn Succito is also very wise, as is the Venerable Jinavamso Bhikku, I do hope to go again soon.
Thanks again,
Stream
Peace and blessings, dear one, on your path, always.
Gassho.
I was thinking that too. Also one can recite the heart sutra or the metta sutta. Or sing a gatha. I will often chant a mantra for 20 minutes before I sit. I have noticed that different mantras can have different effects too. For those lacking resources in their area; youtube can be helpful. Gazing at a mandala or even a nice painting helps me center my mind too. Also, using mudras. That way the ears, the mouth, the eyes, and textile senses are occupied and focused. If I burn a good good quality incense or a nice scented candle; my nose-sense can be focused too. Then, the mind follows.
Hi,
Its interesting, at the meditation session I just came from we chanted before and after the meditation. Words were used like Bhaggavato or something (sorry if thats wrong) and we recited a verse from the Heart Sutra. Where can I find these chants and mantras?
Usually in a book pal, which meditation centre did you attend ?
Om Namo Tassa Bhagavato Arahato Samma-Sambuddhasa?
You can go to youtube. Search Mantra, Dharani, Sutta, Sutra. There will be a lot of hits.
A Ch'an meditation group in Portsmouth Caz. It was nice, every one was very friendly.
OK, will do, thanks Robby.
I am sure, if you have questions about the background of specific mantras, some here can offer some suggestions. Maybe that would call for a separate thread? I regard contemplative chanting as a form of meditation; though not everyone agrees with this. I think even devotional chanting and prayer chanting have elements of meditation.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-wyaP6xXwE
They cannot hurt you. I have found you can get your boat to shore even more quickly, if you embrace the demons rather than try to vanquish them below decks.
Yes, that explains my problem quite well actually. Thanks for the link. Not sure if I will ever be brave enough to make it to shore though.
Patience, determination, repetition and acceptance. It will come.