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Bar fight...did I do the right thing?
So I'm out celebrating my best friends birthday, and we are drinking, with a small party of friends..at a sports bar/pool hall.
It was brought to our attention that some guys outside, were being facetious to my best friends girlfriend. Holding the door shut so she couldn't leave or something like that.. So my best friend being the warrior that he is, goes out and challenges them.. all of them, he challenged like 4-5 guys.
They backed down we all had a good laugh about it..
Later when the bar closed, two of the guys that were causing problems were waiting outside. I don't know if they were waiting for us, but they were there..
We outnumbered them 3 to 2, I don't know what happened, I still am going to ask my friend about it next time I see him., because before I knew it he had one of these guys on the floor..and my friend is kind of a scary fighter:wtf: he has a reputation of not ever losing a fight and dominating people..
so what I did. on instinct was to hold my friend back, pulled him off the melee, and you know restrained him...it's hard lol when the other guys are just taunting him, no one was holding them back they were just standing there shouting things at him..and my friend kept telling me...LET ME GO , LET ME GO, and his girlfriend was with us, and she was crying , pleading with him "lets go home, please stop, Stop, enough-lets go home"
my 3rd friend kind of fought a little bit too but he wasn't enraged you know, but then it really hurt my feelings when we were on our way out of there my friend said to me "I can't believe you man....I can't believe you held me back" type thing.. and the 3rd friend I believe thinks of me as a coward who was scared...that type of thing..(i wasn't at all scared, I was carrying a deadly weapon on me at the time, had my hand on it, just in case I saw a knife or something)
then the cops showed up, the bouncers had called them. the cop just drove away since it looked like it was over, but then somehow I don't even know... my friend was running back the fight them again, this time he got out of my grasp, and entered a floor melee with them again.. I tried to restrain him again...LOL he had cut open his hand on some guys tooth, and his lip was all bloody , I don't even know how bad the other guys were hurt..then the cops actually broke up the fight properly and that was it...
NOW It's really bothering me, that ..If my friend doesn't understand why I held him back...there will be problems with our relationship.
First of all my friend is scary as hell when he's mad. He has the skill and the intelligence to take down his enemies, and a real heart of a warrior type thing. (that's when he's sober) so when he's had about 15 beers and half a bottle of wine, and smoked a lot of pot...I don't know...He could have killed someone by accident EASILY.. I was not at all afraid for HIS physical safety. the problem is we were all trashed drunk....you know..his birthday..the man of the night you know..he wanted to fight..:mad:
What he wanted from me was to let him fight the guys one on one and only interfere if things got bad....
Those stupid "enemy" guys, had no idea who they were messing with... a drunk deadly weapon basically...with a big ego and maybe a girlfriend he wanted to impress..or defend her honor...that type of thing.....
So I feel I took on the role of the coward, I held him back, and I even tried to tell the enemies, like "hey it's his birthday, STOP, STOP" you know....
How I see it though.. I played it safe,
It would have ended like this if I didnt break it up..in my friend leaving both these guys on the floor out in the canadian cold, at 4am bleeding from their faces.. I guarantee that.
Now the cops didn't arrest anyone, I think they might have arrested them though if it came to that. Another thing I was doing was helping his girlfriend the whole time, trying to assure her that everything was alright,
I don't think she would have forgiven me.. If i just stood there and did nothing while my friend savagely beat 2 strangers..it might have damaged her and her relationship with him!..she's very dear to me too..now I've talked with my friend since a little here and there...he vaguely said, "thanks for helping out that night" I don't know if he was being facetious or not..
but I know the next time I'm with him for an afternoon he's going to want to talk about it...maybe..tell me something like "Don't ever interfere again," or something like that..
I want to make sure I can explain it to him properly when the time comes..that I personally.. had to hold him back. For those reasons, to protect the idiots who got him riled up...to protect him from hurting them, to protect his girlfriend ..my ego is telling me though that my friends think im a big coward now..or something...and that pisses me off a bit..the enemies weren't even a threat...:wtf:
Please tell me I did the right thing..
It was brought to our attention that some guys outside, were being facetious to my best friends girlfriend. Holding the door shut so she couldn't leave or something like that.. So my best friend being the warrior that he is, goes out and challenges them.. all of them, he challenged like 4-5 guys.
They backed down we all had a good laugh about it..
Later when the bar closed, two of the guys that were causing problems were waiting outside. I don't know if they were waiting for us, but they were there..
We outnumbered them 3 to 2, I don't know what happened, I still am going to ask my friend about it next time I see him., because before I knew it he had one of these guys on the floor..and my friend is kind of a scary fighter:wtf: he has a reputation of not ever losing a fight and dominating people..
so what I did. on instinct was to hold my friend back, pulled him off the melee, and you know restrained him...it's hard lol when the other guys are just taunting him, no one was holding them back they were just standing there shouting things at him..and my friend kept telling me...LET ME GO , LET ME GO, and his girlfriend was with us, and she was crying , pleading with him "lets go home, please stop, Stop, enough-lets go home"
my 3rd friend kind of fought a little bit too but he wasn't enraged you know, but then it really hurt my feelings when we were on our way out of there my friend said to me "I can't believe you man....I can't believe you held me back" type thing.. and the 3rd friend I believe thinks of me as a coward who was scared...that type of thing..(i wasn't at all scared, I was carrying a deadly weapon on me at the time, had my hand on it, just in case I saw a knife or something)
then the cops showed up, the bouncers had called them. the cop just drove away since it looked like it was over, but then somehow I don't even know... my friend was running back the fight them again, this time he got out of my grasp, and entered a floor melee with them again.. I tried to restrain him again...LOL he had cut open his hand on some guys tooth, and his lip was all bloody , I don't even know how bad the other guys were hurt..then the cops actually broke up the fight properly and that was it...
NOW It's really bothering me, that ..If my friend doesn't understand why I held him back...there will be problems with our relationship.
First of all my friend is scary as hell when he's mad. He has the skill and the intelligence to take down his enemies, and a real heart of a warrior type thing. (that's when he's sober) so when he's had about 15 beers and half a bottle of wine, and smoked a lot of pot...I don't know...He could have killed someone by accident EASILY.. I was not at all afraid for HIS physical safety. the problem is we were all trashed drunk....you know..his birthday..the man of the night you know..he wanted to fight..:mad:
What he wanted from me was to let him fight the guys one on one and only interfere if things got bad....
Those stupid "enemy" guys, had no idea who they were messing with... a drunk deadly weapon basically...with a big ego and maybe a girlfriend he wanted to impress..or defend her honor...that type of thing.....
So I feel I took on the role of the coward, I held him back, and I even tried to tell the enemies, like "hey it's his birthday, STOP, STOP" you know....
How I see it though.. I played it safe,
It would have ended like this if I didnt break it up..in my friend leaving both these guys on the floor out in the canadian cold, at 4am bleeding from their faces.. I guarantee that.
Now the cops didn't arrest anyone, I think they might have arrested them though if it came to that. Another thing I was doing was helping his girlfriend the whole time, trying to assure her that everything was alright,
I don't think she would have forgiven me.. If i just stood there and did nothing while my friend savagely beat 2 strangers..it might have damaged her and her relationship with him!..she's very dear to me too..now I've talked with my friend since a little here and there...he vaguely said, "thanks for helping out that night" I don't know if he was being facetious or not..
but I know the next time I'm with him for an afternoon he's going to want to talk about it...maybe..tell me something like "Don't ever interfere again," or something like that..
I want to make sure I can explain it to him properly when the time comes..that I personally.. had to hold him back. For those reasons, to protect the idiots who got him riled up...to protect him from hurting them, to protect his girlfriend ..my ego is telling me though that my friends think im a big coward now..or something...and that pisses me off a bit..the enemies weren't even a threat...:wtf:
Please tell me I did the right thing..
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Comments
You definitely did the right thing by holding your friend back. And the opinion of someone like that, an out-of-control drunk with violent tendencies, their opinion means nothing.
If one of my friends did something like that, he'd no longer be in my social circle.
I don't think your friend has the "heart of a warrior" at all. A true warrior doesn't go looking for fights, drunk or not. It sounds to me that he is dealing with some serious inner turmoil. A real warrior would have protected his friends and disarmed the situation, rather than escalate it and put everybody in jeopardy. A real warrior doesn't allow himself or herself to lose control like that.
Your friend may be a great guy, otherwise, but he's got some deep issues. If I were in your shoes, I would talk to him about it, sometime when he's calm and sober. I'd mention that his behavior really bothered you and forced you into a situation you didn't want any part in. He could have really injured somebody, been arrested, or gotten hurt, himself (no matter how good a fighter is, there's always a chance). He could have gotten somebody killed.
I've studied martial arts all my life, and most people with any real skill and training do not carry attitudes like that. Your friend may be a great streetfighter, but he's clearly got something to prove. I do understand about the wildfire of youth, but he's got to learn some control.
~ AD