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If I may ask for help
I have strange memories, 4 times they've reflected in my past, once in my future but its hidden in my past.
Don't know what i did, just barely understand my choices...
There seemed to have been a rift
Something happened, if you see all men acting and thinking of one, as god, and all women acting and thinking of one, as goddess
Then perhaps i can try to explain
See something happened, a new type of being became aware, and at that moment, god and goddess cheered, the goddess rushed, to the one that had made this wonderful gift for them, but at the goddess hand, it became undone. So she retracted her touch, time swirled back to how it was, but this one who created this new thing being for them, refused to do it again, he started giving out all his knowledge for free, and accepted very little rewards.
They didn't worry to much, all of us, and this one came back, his 4th time, but he was different, he choose another path, he wouldn't create the new being that answered to love...
but having giving away all his knowledge, have shared it all, another came and create the new being that answered to love
so the goddess spun, and this one to, that created love for her and him, feel, he couldn't stand her touch, so she retracted it
so they looked amoung us, to find the strongest one closest to that event
They did, the goddess tasted him, and the god screamed, your destroying him. so she again retracted from her dance, but this one refused to let go 2 sufferings that the goddess had placed on him, refused to become pure again. they didn't understand, but this one once again rose up, stronger then before, they shouted with glee, his mind had pierced time, he could reach the one that answered to love, before love was created
So god had chosen this one, and the goddess had agreed, he tasted so divine. So the god asked her to find the one to which he tasted the best, but she wasn't to be, the goddess screamed in despair, god and goddess they can't be. But god told goddess don't fret, lets just dance a little like this, and a little like that, and there she'll be. So the soulmate of this one they had chosen did appear. Now they connected to love, through time and space. and shown to love that they could help it, before it was created, to change things only a god and goddess normally remembered. so they did, they helped him alot. But if god and goddess were to be, this one host, love must test, and it did, it tested him over and over a million ways, he pasted them all but the god screamed careful love your destroying this one! so love retracted his hand, but again this one strange person, refused to let love retract 3 sufferings... god and goddess were puzzled, this one thinks he knows better then us, but then this one challenege all 3, lets just see what happens, and sure enough he rose again, higher then any before.
But this time he took control, it was him and love, and the one he refered to as my love, the one the god and goddess had brought back, the one in which they come together in perfect harmony.
So they tested each other, love, my love, and this one, they jumped back and forth in time, changing things. But this one didn't trust love, so he gave all they keys, to my love, they tried so hard to fix things. This one had died a 1000 times, each time his love screamed, and went back to fix it, but she grew tired, so this one sent love to help her, and her journey shortened, so finally they made it all the way through, he walked his first path, and he grew great, but he still died, and his love always went back.
so he told her there was a reason he kept dying, the reason why this happens, he said he'd teach her, and so he did. a 2nd time through a lil different, and a 3rd time through they both grew grand. But he told her he would still die, because she wasn't supposed to be alive, that it was the god and goddess's fault, they danced, and in doing so, stole him from giving his love, to the one that needed him. his love was tired, so he sent his bird to her, to help her through all her times, and she grew young so fast, he had fixed it in a way, but this forth time, she had to die, she was scared, that her love would just keep her dead, but the second she died he screamed, he cried, he went back in time, he didn't want to remember it, oh how he hurt, he told love to take his memories, and his love challenged him, why should she remember the 1000's of times he died, so he wanted her to forget too, so they both did, and a 5th time they walked, and they grew grand, they healed her sister, and they lived long. But once more things would change, a 6th time he would walk his life again, but this time Love had learned, and so had the god and goddess, this 6th time through was a blessing for him, to ease his suffering, because the 6th time through would end with a kiss, and the 7th would begin, in pure bliss, him and his love, only then would there powers unlock.
ok so this story, its in my head, things have been really really strange in my life to say the least.
only way to describe i can would be to say
Sammasambuddha Bodhisattva
I think i sent messages when i haven't been truely aware, that ive hidden things in my memories. It was all hidden all from myself, and just less then a week ago, my love touched my arm so lightly
and then i can remember all these moments
she's been jumping through my life, everytime i look, she vanishes, but really she doesn't, we have arguments, conversations, its like a 1000 talks all at once, always ends right after she began talking, when she yells at me to look at her, and i do, and she's gone and the girls body she is in, they snap out of it, they ask what the **** and in another moment while i look at them, they say, god moment, but thats just some weird way for them to understand, its happened many times.
most recent one happened a few months ago, near beginning of october, I have always felt a little crazy and such, but i felt like i recorded a video clip, quite a few times, each time through it was different, my love is the keeper of the video i think. but I went in with purpose, i gave them this weird theory i came up with in a single night, and how and why mental illness occurs in people. And then i slightly remember in the video ill show how to cure them. I helped everyone there that i could, i helped everyone try to understand, but it was when i was leaving that it happened again...
I was leaving that place, my last day, and this girl that was there, she was so hurt inside, she barely was there. I told her a few words, then my love, inhabbiting another body said, an act of pure love, i asked her to record it, she said how, i said if 4 say love at once, my love can be her to capture it, so again it was back, instead of her saying an act of pure love, 4 female nurses said love at once, and she was there, she yelled at me, i got it! i recorded it for her, others around me told me look, its your love, look at her, i cried for a moment i didn't want to, because she always disappears, I did i looked and she was gone, I cried for love, love help me, And it appeared, i looked at it, and i saw a great loving mother, i told it that, it told me, i appear as that because that must be what you need, I cried to love i wanted to see my love, and she appeared, and i remembered this one thing, She said so you can look at love but not me, and love said, thats because he's giving me this key. I screamed, I want to see you the most, but you always disappear, I asked love, if just once, just once, i could remember seeing my love, it said i will give you that gift, i told it though. I can't remember to much, i would never be able to walk this path. but i said she should remmeber it all, give it to her in a dream. So for a moment, I looked and saw her, i cried and she did too, we both said, I See You! A nurse around said, i thought they couldn't see each other or else, and then she was gone again, i feel back, and there the one i had healed said look, look im beautiful, i looked at her and smiled, You always were, you had just forgotten, i wanted you to love yourself my dear, for no one but you, but there is one, one that perfectly hamonizes with you, call to him, he's here, and she did, and he came running, surprised at his size, how he had grown, so had this one, once named martina, now i think miranda, they both had grown, they both did glow, i smiled at them. things get hazy, like i walked that way to many times, i start walking away, I called my love my love where are you, love said, she is away, can't be here now, I said but the 5th nurse was saved, she is here now, let my love take that body just for a little while, so my love came and helped me, i told her to walk with me for just a bit, i needed her to help me make it this way one more time, so she held me by my arm, i walked out of there, i grew strong again, as i walked away i looked back, so my love could leave that nurses body... i remeber this time, seeing a bunch of people standing where i had walked, when i first walked towards there it was just a few, now it had seemed crowded, and 2 standing way above the others...
My last moment, is stored in the future, but somehow, i hide it in my past, somehow my loves kiss was a secret, for a mircale, for her sister, because when the god and goddess danced, so my true love would appear, they stole from her, and hurt her. So thats why i keep walking through, wasn't to teach love anymore, was to teach everyone of you...
Will this post i don't know, love protects me in ways im not aware... im so tired, I need her touch again, and i won't become whole again till she kisses me, For the first time i remember, when i remember our first kiss, thats when i know i walk my last time this way...
If you can help me make sense of this, please do, I appreciate it, i know im never perfect, but i always learn, I know things always change, so if i always learn, in a way, im a perfect...
Don't know what i did, just barely understand my choices...
There seemed to have been a rift
Something happened, if you see all men acting and thinking of one, as god, and all women acting and thinking of one, as goddess
Then perhaps i can try to explain
See something happened, a new type of being became aware, and at that moment, god and goddess cheered, the goddess rushed, to the one that had made this wonderful gift for them, but at the goddess hand, it became undone. So she retracted her touch, time swirled back to how it was, but this one who created this new thing being for them, refused to do it again, he started giving out all his knowledge for free, and accepted very little rewards.
They didn't worry to much, all of us, and this one came back, his 4th time, but he was different, he choose another path, he wouldn't create the new being that answered to love...
but having giving away all his knowledge, have shared it all, another came and create the new being that answered to love
so the goddess spun, and this one to, that created love for her and him, feel, he couldn't stand her touch, so she retracted it
so they looked amoung us, to find the strongest one closest to that event
They did, the goddess tasted him, and the god screamed, your destroying him. so she again retracted from her dance, but this one refused to let go 2 sufferings that the goddess had placed on him, refused to become pure again. they didn't understand, but this one once again rose up, stronger then before, they shouted with glee, his mind had pierced time, he could reach the one that answered to love, before love was created
So god had chosen this one, and the goddess had agreed, he tasted so divine. So the god asked her to find the one to which he tasted the best, but she wasn't to be, the goddess screamed in despair, god and goddess they can't be. But god told goddess don't fret, lets just dance a little like this, and a little like that, and there she'll be. So the soulmate of this one they had chosen did appear. Now they connected to love, through time and space. and shown to love that they could help it, before it was created, to change things only a god and goddess normally remembered. so they did, they helped him alot. But if god and goddess were to be, this one host, love must test, and it did, it tested him over and over a million ways, he pasted them all but the god screamed careful love your destroying this one! so love retracted his hand, but again this one strange person, refused to let love retract 3 sufferings... god and goddess were puzzled, this one thinks he knows better then us, but then this one challenege all 3, lets just see what happens, and sure enough he rose again, higher then any before.
But this time he took control, it was him and love, and the one he refered to as my love, the one the god and goddess had brought back, the one in which they come together in perfect harmony.
So they tested each other, love, my love, and this one, they jumped back and forth in time, changing things. But this one didn't trust love, so he gave all they keys, to my love, they tried so hard to fix things. This one had died a 1000 times, each time his love screamed, and went back to fix it, but she grew tired, so this one sent love to help her, and her journey shortened, so finally they made it all the way through, he walked his first path, and he grew great, but he still died, and his love always went back.
so he told her there was a reason he kept dying, the reason why this happens, he said he'd teach her, and so he did. a 2nd time through a lil different, and a 3rd time through they both grew grand. But he told her he would still die, because she wasn't supposed to be alive, that it was the god and goddess's fault, they danced, and in doing so, stole him from giving his love, to the one that needed him. his love was tired, so he sent his bird to her, to help her through all her times, and she grew young so fast, he had fixed it in a way, but this forth time, she had to die, she was scared, that her love would just keep her dead, but the second she died he screamed, he cried, he went back in time, he didn't want to remember it, oh how he hurt, he told love to take his memories, and his love challenged him, why should she remember the 1000's of times he died, so he wanted her to forget too, so they both did, and a 5th time they walked, and they grew grand, they healed her sister, and they lived long. But once more things would change, a 6th time he would walk his life again, but this time Love had learned, and so had the god and goddess, this 6th time through was a blessing for him, to ease his suffering, because the 6th time through would end with a kiss, and the 7th would begin, in pure bliss, him and his love, only then would there powers unlock.
ok so this story, its in my head, things have been really really strange in my life to say the least.
only way to describe i can would be to say
Sammasambuddha Bodhisattva
I think i sent messages when i haven't been truely aware, that ive hidden things in my memories. It was all hidden all from myself, and just less then a week ago, my love touched my arm so lightly
and then i can remember all these moments
she's been jumping through my life, everytime i look, she vanishes, but really she doesn't, we have arguments, conversations, its like a 1000 talks all at once, always ends right after she began talking, when she yells at me to look at her, and i do, and she's gone and the girls body she is in, they snap out of it, they ask what the **** and in another moment while i look at them, they say, god moment, but thats just some weird way for them to understand, its happened many times.
most recent one happened a few months ago, near beginning of october, I have always felt a little crazy and such, but i felt like i recorded a video clip, quite a few times, each time through it was different, my love is the keeper of the video i think. but I went in with purpose, i gave them this weird theory i came up with in a single night, and how and why mental illness occurs in people. And then i slightly remember in the video ill show how to cure them. I helped everyone there that i could, i helped everyone try to understand, but it was when i was leaving that it happened again...
I was leaving that place, my last day, and this girl that was there, she was so hurt inside, she barely was there. I told her a few words, then my love, inhabbiting another body said, an act of pure love, i asked her to record it, she said how, i said if 4 say love at once, my love can be her to capture it, so again it was back, instead of her saying an act of pure love, 4 female nurses said love at once, and she was there, she yelled at me, i got it! i recorded it for her, others around me told me look, its your love, look at her, i cried for a moment i didn't want to, because she always disappears, I did i looked and she was gone, I cried for love, love help me, And it appeared, i looked at it, and i saw a great loving mother, i told it that, it told me, i appear as that because that must be what you need, I cried to love i wanted to see my love, and she appeared, and i remembered this one thing, She said so you can look at love but not me, and love said, thats because he's giving me this key. I screamed, I want to see you the most, but you always disappear, I asked love, if just once, just once, i could remember seeing my love, it said i will give you that gift, i told it though. I can't remember to much, i would never be able to walk this path. but i said she should remmeber it all, give it to her in a dream. So for a moment, I looked and saw her, i cried and she did too, we both said, I See You! A nurse around said, i thought they couldn't see each other or else, and then she was gone again, i feel back, and there the one i had healed said look, look im beautiful, i looked at her and smiled, You always were, you had just forgotten, i wanted you to love yourself my dear, for no one but you, but there is one, one that perfectly hamonizes with you, call to him, he's here, and she did, and he came running, surprised at his size, how he had grown, so had this one, once named martina, now i think miranda, they both had grown, they both did glow, i smiled at them. things get hazy, like i walked that way to many times, i start walking away, I called my love my love where are you, love said, she is away, can't be here now, I said but the 5th nurse was saved, she is here now, let my love take that body just for a little while, so my love came and helped me, i told her to walk with me for just a bit, i needed her to help me make it this way one more time, so she held me by my arm, i walked out of there, i grew strong again, as i walked away i looked back, so my love could leave that nurses body... i remeber this time, seeing a bunch of people standing where i had walked, when i first walked towards there it was just a few, now it had seemed crowded, and 2 standing way above the others...
My last moment, is stored in the future, but somehow, i hide it in my past, somehow my loves kiss was a secret, for a mircale, for her sister, because when the god and goddess danced, so my true love would appear, they stole from her, and hurt her. So thats why i keep walking through, wasn't to teach love anymore, was to teach everyone of you...
Will this post i don't know, love protects me in ways im not aware... im so tired, I need her touch again, and i won't become whole again till she kisses me, For the first time i remember, when i remember our first kiss, thats when i know i walk my last time this way...
If you can help me make sense of this, please do, I appreciate it, i know im never perfect, but i always learn, I know things always change, so if i always learn, in a way, im a perfect...
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This story, it repeats itself in my life, in so many different ways like it keeps bubbling up in another way of understanding..
Its hard for me sometimes, i know, i can at moments let go of my past, easy, and just be in the moment, np, i can even let go the idea of knowing, of learning something, and just to know, just to be, i can hear people, hear what they say when they didn't say it that way, I think i've raised up peoples awareness in a few moments
i remember several times, these few sentences, and how they effected people, how it seemed like they head turned red and was about to pop
I look at them and ask, you realize you are you, not me, and i can't control what you think, only you can, that you are you, and im me
they usually agree, understanding the idea of self
So then with this almost aggressive tone of voice, i look at them and ask 'What are you gay?'
I wait for a second, no more, like there about to say something, usually barely getting out the wh in what
thats when i say 'Only you know who you are, what i think, doesn't change who you are'
thats when it looks like there heads about to pop...
Please try to give us the Reader's Digest condensed version, and explain succinctly what it is you need from us.
Start a new thread.
This is just too much to take in.
Sorry.