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Difference between loving-kindness and compassion?

painpain
edited September 2010 in Buddhism Basics
According to wiki..
The American monk Bhikkhu Bodhi states that compassion "supplies the complement to loving-kindness: whereas loving-kindness has the characteristic of wishing for the happiness and welfare of others, compassion has the characteristic of wishing that others be free from suffering, a wish to be extended without limits to all living beings.

Doesn't "happiness" equal to "free from suffering?" So, are loving-kindness essentially same as compassion?

Comments

  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    edited September 2010
    I think whenever you have one of the four immeasurables you have them all.. So happiness and free from suffering are two sides of the same coin.
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited September 2010
    pain wrote: »
    According to wiki..



    Doesn't "happiness" equal to "free from suffering?" So, are loving-kindness essentially same as compassion?
    No, not quite. You can be compassionate for somebody, without feeling loving kindness for them.
    Compassion is the inherent and cultivated desire to see others free of suffering. Loving kindness means further embracing them to you in a heartfelt equanimous way.
    Certainly, one should develop them both, if ever possible. But sometimes this is a challenge. Start with Universal Compassion. Then move on to Unconditional love.

    Remember both qualities must be also addressed to yourself.

    This is why the immeasurables are four, not one.

    Just my opinion, though certainly, arguable....
  • GlowGlow Veteran
    edited September 2010
    Compassion is wishing for someone to be free from suffering while they are suffering. It acknowledges and becomes fearlessly intimate with someone's suffering in a way lovingkindness may not be able to do. They are definitely related, but compassion is the slightly more uncomfortable of the two.

    Another way to see the difference in the two is to consider the teaching on the near and far enemies. Near enemies are qualities that may be easily mistaken for the genuine brahmavihara, but is actually antithetical to it. The far enemy is the exact opposite of the brahmavihara. Thus, the near enemy of lovingkindness is conditional love. ("I will love you so long as you give me the following things...") The far enemy of lovingkindness is hatred. The near enemy of compassion is pity. ("Oh poor you!" There is an egoic separation from the person you're feeling pity for. You feel sorry for them, while feeling superior to them in some way for not experiencing the same suffering they are experiencing.) The far enemy of compassion is cruelty.

    Lovingkindness is more attitudinal. Compassion is more active.
  • TreeLuvr87TreeLuvr87 Veteran
    edited September 2010
    I consider compassion to contain a bit of empathy, too. It might not be in the webster definition or anything, but that's how I've always understood compassion.
  • JeffreyJeffrey Veteran
    edited September 2010
    Another near enemy of compassion is becoming overwhelmed. Which can spiral to depression. In that case the recommendation is to choose a person who is easier for you to feel true compassion for. Then you build up to the more difficult case.

    Not speaking from my own experience as I just am introduced to this topic but I am listening to Pema Chodron's 'From Fear to Fearlessness' which the topic is the 4 immeasurable minds as catalysts of awakening.
  • fivebellsfivebells Veteran
    edited September 2010
    It's easier to think about how the immeasurables relate to experience in general than how they relate to relationships with other people. From that perspective, metta is opening to and appreciating the current moment of experience, and karuna is resting in the experience.

    In terms of people, loving-kindness is wishing them happiness, wellness and peace, and compassion is wishing them freedom from suffering, harm and disturbance. The relational aspect of metta comes from an appreciation of the person which arises from opening to the experience of them. The relational aspect of karuna comes from awareness of their pain, which arises from resting in the experience of them (without reaction to couteract the experience of the pain.)
  • ownerof1000oddsocksownerof1000oddsocks Veteran
    edited September 2010
    In the past I've performed mercy killings on small creatures that were attacked by my vicious cats, although I gave that up because it seemed there was no dignity in it. Picked one poor cat up from the road after it had been run over, gave it a stroke and it seemed to be purring so perhaps it was free from suffering.

    Well, I suppose compassion is more of an attitude- a mature attitude maybe- since sometimes we may be powerless to actually alleviate the pain, without resorting to something crude.
  • federicafederica Seeker of the clear blue sky... Its better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak out and remove all doubt Moderator
    edited September 2010
    cats purr when in great pain. it's a form of stress/pain relief.....
  • ownerof1000oddsocksownerof1000oddsocks Veteran
    edited September 2010
    Our Katie Cat was not purring when she died. I put her outside so she wasn't staring at the wall then she took two steps and fell over, so we put her under a deck chair to shield her from the rain, and she lasted about an hour more. She looked more like death as she lay dying, but an expression of peace and calm overcame her afterwards.

    I'm don't mean to contradict you, I have to take what you said into account. But anyway, what do you think about mercy killing?

    Can it be compassionate?
  • cazcaz Veteran United Kingdom Veteran
    edited September 2010
    Loving Kindness is a mind which has an equal warm hearted feeling toward everyone that loves them without attachment much like a mother would unconditionally love their own child.

    Compassion Is the wish for others to be free from their suffering, Great Compassion Is the wish for every living beings without exception to be free from suffering :)
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