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A Great Book
Argon.Aid
Veteran
Hey,people..
I had just read an excellent book which i stumbled on by boredom in my school library.(Can't believe my school library harbour such books).
Its The Art of Happiness:A Handbook for Living
Written by Howard C. Cutler.M.D. with the help of His Holiness The Dalai Lama.
It emcompasses on how to stay happy.Plus just reading the first few pages has inspire me.
And I also want to enquire.Anyone here ever faced a situation where a good friend of yours turn enemy to you?.
This is because I faced a situation where my blood friends,two people whom I considered to be my brothers,have turned against me.They now have made it their aim to disrupt my life.Some examples of acts are shouting profanities plus attacking me mentally.
Can anyone give me any advice to me or maybe also to those outside who face similar situations?Thanks.
May your faith in your religion
I had just read an excellent book which i stumbled on by boredom in my school library.(Can't believe my school library harbour such books).
Its The Art of Happiness:A Handbook for Living
Written by Howard C. Cutler.M.D. with the help of His Holiness The Dalai Lama.
It emcompasses on how to stay happy.Plus just reading the first few pages has inspire me.
And I also want to enquire.Anyone here ever faced a situation where a good friend of yours turn enemy to you?.
This is because I faced a situation where my blood friends,two people whom I considered to be my brothers,have turned against me.They now have made it their aim to disrupt my life.Some examples of acts are shouting profanities plus attacking me mentally.
Can anyone give me any advice to me or maybe also to those outside who face similar situations?Thanks.
May your faith in your religion
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Comments
The only way we can feed the bullies in our lives is to pay them attention and let them see they're having an effect. Avoid them. ignore them. pretty soon, they'll get tired and move on to another victim.
Hope one of these Blood Brothers is not known to us.....:(
I don't mind them attacking me,that I have learn to get used to.But they go as far as to shout insults and slander to those who converse with me.I am afraid this may end up in people rallying WITH them against me.
Don't worry,the blodd brothers are none of us.I guess its a twist of fate.I once was a bully together with them.Now,I want to take this chance to apologise to Ajani.He was the once who bore the brunt of our insults when we were young and lost.
I am really sorry,Ajani for those terrible things I had done to you in the past.I insulted your integrity and also turned down all your teachings of religions.Ironically,it is you that lead me to the right path.Now,I know who my true blood frineds are,You people.
Thanks.
May your faith in your religion remain unwavering.
Don't worry too much about it, nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes once in a while, especially when we're young. At least you saw your errors and can admit that you made some mistakes. Wisdom and forgiveness are close companions. One is not found far from the other.
May your faith in yourself remain just as unwavering.
Jason
you have a few options..
the one i find that comes easy to me..
is........
recognizing first that my ego is being hurt
second.. i examine what they are saying.. sometimes and only
sometimes it may hold ground. put it this way.. if someone was
to call you " the uglest person on the planet, the meanest etc etc."
and you no it wasnt true.. you would just carry on with your day
and no in your heart they had some issues.. ( they never hit a
soft spot with you so you never got upset..)
but when someone hits a soft spot " as i call it " then perhaps they
have hit on something that you have been ignoring.. and then i would
silently thank them and get on with my homework.
if however you are not feeling attacked by their comments then it is
another issue.
im assuming your ego is at stake.
so do some ego homework..
send peace to these friends.. knowing it is their path to veer away from
you for awhile..
all the "whys" are not important..
im hearing they are to you at this point.. but try to find a middle path on
needing to no the whys.. dont get caught up on tryin to figure it all out..
your answers will come.. maybe tomoro,, maybe a month from now, maybe
longer.. have faith that when the fruit is ripe it will be yours for the picking.
most of all.. dont let anger posion your vessels
send these guys peace, understand they are hurting or going through what ever.
breath....................
go into the moment right now....... smile
all is in order
it is as it should be
yes its natural to hurt.. hurt if you really must .. then let it go in meditation.
peace to you..
xx
and perhaps my prior advice is not in tune to what you were saying
so i will add to it.
im guessing these are school people which are hard to get away from?
because amongest my previous advice i would try to distance myself
physically for my sake as well as theirs. ( if that is possible )
you sound like you are trying to really concer all!
thats a tough job..
if they influence your associates well let your associates make their
minds what they believe or dont believe.
if you feel your life is at risk. do take action.
but they sound like bullies that will get sick and tired of the chatter
and retire quickly ..
i would tho give them no attention.. only in meditation and sending
peace when they are in my thoughts..
they dont sound like they would take any attention and make good of it... AT THIS POINT IN TIME.. whether it be postive or negative.
keep us posted
we care
Argon,
This post has touched me deeply. Especially your apology to Ajani and your recognition of what might be a little bit of karma at work and that we never know who our teachers are going to be. I think this is beautiful.
You're facing a tough situation. I think everyone's advice here is absolutely right. You must grin and bear it and give them no encouragement whatsoever.
I can understand your fear that your current friends may desert you if they start believing the lies about you. But the solution is actually quite simple and it's also a practice for Buddhism. If your current friends ask you if what those guys are yelling is true, tell them if it is, or isn't. The rest is up to them. The ones who leave you to go to them are not your friends. The ones who stay are your friends. The Buddhist practice is to let those who want to go, go. Non-attachment.
You need to be strong and confident in yourself in this situation. It's a tough one. But you can do it. I know this because what you wrote are the words of a mature, wise and strong man. Really, Argon, it's true. So you have every right to feel confident in this situation. You've already done the most difficult thing of all; you recognized where you went wrong and you apologized like a man. You're now above any childish things these people may do.
I have the book you're reading as well and I LOVE it. Keep reading it, because the advice you get from it will be the best. Follow that wisdom and you won't go wrong.
If these boys become a threat to you physically or emotionally, you must tell the authorities. If they're just acting like babies you have nothing to fear. But if they become violent in any way, physically or emotionally, if you feel threatened, you must tell your teachers, for their sake as well as yours and your friends'. You know this is important, I'm sure. But I would be remiss if I didn't mention it here.
Thanks for posting this, Argon. Well done.
Brigid