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Completely Letting Go
I have recently, and I mean really recently found refuge in Buddhism, after being Christian
and then Agnostic :mad: (which, for those who don't know, means not denying and not accepting any religion). It was a very confusing time and I believe Buddhism is the right place for me finally. I love the idea that Buddhism is more of a way of life rather than a religion. 
The one thing that continuously bothers me is that will I have to let go of my dreams and passions to be Buddhist? Because one of the four noble truths is that suffering comes from craving, and dreams seem to be craving to me. You see, I'm a student, and grades are important, but does this mean I can't care about them anymore? Is there a middle ground, or is it a yes-no-no maybes type of thing?
I would also like for someone to further explain the Eight-Fold Path in more detail for me. Thanks very much!
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Comments
You are right when you say that suffering comes from craving.By the way it also comes from aversion.As a student you should strive to get the best results that you can.In this day and age a good education is important.The problem with craving or desire is when we don't get what we are after.So in your case you want good grades,but not getting them will cause you suffering.If you can understand that this can happen then you are letting go.I have seen people who did not quite get the grade they wanted,so they could not get into the university of their choice.This caused them all sorts of anguish.This is the middle ground you are seeking,hope for good grades but accept that maybe they are not as good as you would like.If you can do this then you will not suffer so much.:)
As for the 8 fold path maybe check out this site. http://www.thebigview.com/buddhism
It seems to explain things in plain language.
Best wishes on your journey.
With metta
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an04/an04.159.than.html
The practice is about letting go, but in order to let go we first need certain types of craving to get us there. First there is the craving for some kind of meaning. Then maybe we encounter the Buddha's Teachings and we get a little taste of what its about. So then there is a craving to study these Teachings more fully. Maybe after a while there comes a craving to keep the precepts and a craving to learn meditation and a craving to join a community of fellow practitioners for support. All these types of craving are skillful.
The Buddha taught the simile of the raft. the Teachings, the precepts, the meditation, fellow practitioners are all like a raft. Their purpose is to help us cross the stream of craving. You should let go of these things when they have taken you safely to the other shore. But don't let go of them while you are mid-stream:
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.022.than.html
But, having said this, study hard and do your best in worldly pursuits. There is nothing wrong with having goals and plans. Just be aware that no matter how hard you study and how much you want something, it might not turn out the way you hoped. This is not meant as a discouragement, but as a reminder that this is sometimes how it goes. As long as you keep this in mind, and try your best anyway, you will be fine. Focus on the process more so than the end-result.
I wish you all the best in both your worldly and your Dhammic pursuits.
Buddhism is not about nihilism - relative reality exists and grades are important in order to gain a job so that body and soul can be looked after.
How long have you got? For anywhere near an adequate explanation you are perhaps better to consult a reliable text. If you follow the Tibetan tradition the Lam Rim is the acceptable text and even then the commentary can run to several volumes.
If you want a good read have a look at Thich Nhat Hanh's Old Path White Clouds. Here Thay presents the Buddha's life and teachings in an easy digestible format.
Otherwise, consult you Dharma centre.
Hi LittleAlly,
The Eightfold Path is contained within the fourth Noble Truth.
You can find an excellent and easy to understand explanation of the Four Noble Truths and Eightfold path from Ajahn Sumedho here:
http://www.buddhanet.net/pdf_file/4nobltru.pdf
Kind wishes,
Dazzle
.
I was also confused about grades... being in the final years of uni, I can't afford not to care about them. I found motivation in the fact that I'd have a more flexible career path in the future, which will mean I am not stuck in one meaningless job and can find something that is truly helpful to myself and other.
The idea of 'letting go' can be confusing. Yes, you can still be ambitious. Buddhism is about the middle path. Letting go of everything or attaching to too much or having excessive attachment is against the idea of the middle path. Yes, craving can cause suffering, but craving can also be categorized into healthy and unhealthy craving. The Buddha had a craving and that was he craved to help others overcome suffering. Healthy craving are those that are healthy for you or healthy for other people (e.g. your desire to overcome jealousy, your desire to help another person). Unhealthy craving are those based on unhealthy selfishness and greed (e.g. power, dominance, expensive possessions, status etc).
Secondly, it is a matter of varying your craving or attachment according to your situation. For example, when a child is born, a mother would be expected to be attached to the child. This is a healthy attachment. If there was no attachment, then, this can cause suffering to the child, mother and to other people. If the child was causing the mother significant emotional suffering and is struggling to cope, the mother would then need to lessen her attachment so that she can feel better. Once, she has felt better and is ready to return to care for the child, she can increase her attachment. If the child dies, then it is time for let go. Nothing can be done to revive the child, and it is time to let go the attachment. Holding on will cause suffering. So, what this means, is that we vary our attachments to the situation. This is how we avoid suffering. Having absolutely no attachments is unwise and can cause suffering (e.g. loneliness, regret, no motivation, boredom etc). A good example will be the Buddha. He still had goals (e.g. relieve others from suffering, spread the Dharma) whilst still being able to eliminate much of his mental suffering. So healthy craving is fine.
I could'nt have agreed more
Craving to me is a strong desire to obtain something. This feeling is so intense that it actually distracted me when I was meditating. It could be the intense craving to relief myself or to relief the cramps or itches
While for studies and grades it is a different thing. We should not 'let go' by giving up studies or be lazy(a road of ruin).
It just means that we should not desire too much and expect extremely high marks. We should learn to be content(but not to be complacent) about our grades.
"Study hard for a better future" is a motto I have for myself. I would study dilligently fir exams but I will not expect anything be it praise, recognition, popularity etc from doing well.
If I received praise or criticisms I would accept them all with an open mind, trying not to be affected by them for they are impermanent.
Initially when I did well for my exams I would be elated. But as time passes I felt like a fool because my friends outdone me or I did not fare as well as before.
Craving is negative and positive. It is negative when you allow it to affect the mental state of your mind. Craving, if controlled will be positive if it serves as a motivating factor, a motivating force which propels you to excellence without affecting the state of your mind.
I completely agree. Well said.
Hi LittleAlly,
The purpose of Buddhism is to benefit sentient beings... if you can base your passions and dreams in a positive motivation to benefit sentient beings, then by all means go all out to pursue your dreams... but remember your real basis is benefiting others... if your real inner motive at a sub-conscious level is just for your own pleasure and enjoyment, self-clinging would lead to all kinds of neurosis in your daily situations... that create pain and inner-conflict.
So basically, it depends on your motivation. I recommend that you read Lama Yeshe's teachings at the fpmt website as i think he deals with contemporary buddhism in modern day life very well...
www.lamayeshe.com
i do not think that one has to drop away one's passions / dreams... but if along the way, it drops away naturally due to one's transformation spiritually, then don't be surprised...:rolleyes:
http://www.thubtenchodron.org/GradualPathToEnlightenment/A_EightfoldPath.html
How do you stop caring about your grades? How you you stop caring about anything? How do you stop your hand from hurting if you stick in it the fire?
The answer is, "You don't." What you DO do is restructure & reframe how you experience and relate to your grades, your attachments, your aversions, your hurting. This does not come about by changing how you think, or by adopting intellectual attitudes. It comes about naturally, at its own speed, by following the practice, which includes all you are taught: the meditations, the loving-kindness practices, the mindfulness practices, etc. Rest easy ... it comes when it comes, all as a result of your Practice. It is an experiential acquirement, not an intellectual acquirement. There are no shortcuts.
This reminds me of a important dilemma that I've had over the years during my martial arts training and its probably not the obvious one you would think of in Buddhism. It is actually about goal setting. I have had a hard time over the years accepting goal setting and Buddhism coexisting, my preference is more to go with the flow rather than setting goals and working towards them. Now I am seeing that this is a wrong view that I've held, there is nothing wrong with setting goals, planning and taking action in relation to these goals and it is much more in sync with Buddhism than not making any plans and achieving no results. I have yet to fully accept this myself but these things take time, change of view coming the first, integration of the view comes second. I see my previous view as rationalising my habitual laziness. In some traditions there is talk about relative and absolute which I won't go into here due to the context of the OP, but, in my view, my previous belief is an example of ignoring the relative in preference to the absolute and imposing an artificial hierarchy to these two concepts. Goal setting is a powerful tool that we can use in our lives and one that until now I've disregarded. In fact I might even right down my goals today and take that first step!
Cheers, WK