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Asian parents comparing their children and Buddhism
When I refer to Asian parents, I do not mean all Asian parents as there Asian parents who do not compare their children to other children.
Asian parents have a tendency to compare the achievements or qualities of their children with the achievements or qualities of the children of other parents. Whenever, the child performs better than the other children, the parents can show off their child's achievements. When the child performs worser than other children, the parents experience frustration, anger and disappointment and the parents criticize child, potentially damaging the child's self esteem and causing them to feel distressed.
Comparing children is against the Dharma. Our attachments and desires (that is, desire for our children to better than other children) causes us, the child and indirectly other people to suffer. Also, it is going against the concept of loving kindness and compassion. When the child's performance is inadequate, instead of comforting and encouraging the child, parents criticize and in some cases physically hit their children. They believe, this motivates the children to perform, when in fact, it often has the opposite effect.
Despite knowledge of the Dharma, some Asian Buddhists still do this. What are your thoughts on this?
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Asian parents have a tendency to compare the achievements or qualities of their children with the achievements or qualities of the children of other parents. Whenever, the child performs better than the other children, the parents can show off their child's achievements. When the child performs worser than other children, the parents experience frustration, anger and disappointment and the parents criticize child, potentially damaging the child's self esteem and causing them to feel distressed.
Comparing children is against the Dharma. Our attachments and desires (that is, desire for our children to better than other children) causes us, the child and indirectly other people to suffer. Also, it is going against the concept of loving kindness and compassion. When the child's performance is inadequate, instead of comforting and encouraging the child, parents criticize and in some cases physically hit their children. They believe, this motivates the children to perform, when in fact, it often has the opposite effect.
Despite knowledge of the Dharma, some Asian Buddhists still do this. What are your thoughts on this?
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Comments
Buddhism used as religion is not a little different to any other religion. There is no "Buddhist" wonderland in Asia. If you like to get a lot of Buddhist teaching, it just grows in western countries.
One more thing is, that the way of live is not easy to understand for western people. No need to judge but a real good challenge to understand life where it happens not so artifact.