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dealing with anger

jhol1007jhol1007 federica
edited November 2010 in Buddhism Today
Hi, I'm a new Buddhist and I'm practicing it from a philosophical angle. I try to follow the middle path and realize the four truths, as well as avoid the 5 hindrances, but its been kind of hard. I'm a high school student and I live with my Mom and Dad. I love my parents, and I always have, but, I'm really not trying to be mean at all, I'm just stating a fact: my mom isn't the smartest person and she has a very short fuse sometimes. This morning I was helping her with some things ( I won't bore you with what they were) and she ended up messing everything up, making the whole process take much longer. I told her in a forceful, but not angry, tone that she should be careful not to do it again. She overreacted greatly (I think) and became so offended/stressed/upset that she began crying. My dad then yelled at me and told me I had ruined the morning. I feel full of anger and rage, even though I know those are very bad feelings to have towards my parents. This sort of thing happens fairly frequently and I don't know how to deal with it. I was hoping there was something in Buddhist scriptures or some aspect of Buddhism that deals with this. Is there?

Thank you very much for your help,
James

Comments

  • fivebellsfivebells Veteran
    edited November 2010
    The aspect of Buddhism which deals with it is Buddhist meditation practice. If you're not meditating, you might as well be practicing Christianity.
  • ShiftPlusOneShiftPlusOne Veteran
    edited November 2010
    "It is spoken at the right time. It is spoken in truth. It is spoken affectionately. It is spoken beneficially. It is spoken with a mind of good-will.
    http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an05/an05.198.than.html

    You'd think she'd be aware of the fact she screwed up, you pointing it out isn't very helpful.

    People often over-react when they are stress, insecure, threatened, etc. Basically, she wasn't in the mood for your comment, perhaps a comforting comment may have been more appropriate than criticism.

    You could still say it later, at a more fitting time, but that was definitely not the right time for it.

    If you mum has a short fuse, then it's best to remain silent at times like that.
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