Entering the Buddhist path!

Kundabuffer

Hi all

First of let me introduce myself. 35 years old from Slovenia. Always been interested in spiritual stuff. Tried some occult, Huna etc. I discovered Buddhism not long ago and really liked the philosophy. Been meditating and following the path. The problem is still it seems to me I live in kind of a hole. Good days always followed by very dark days (you know that feeling like your head is gonna explode), tired a lot, stuck in a realtionships which is also very insecure. I like the girl but have this deep feeling something is not clicking between us. Then thjere is this clinging to sex, alcohol and recreational use of drugs. Meditating but still my life seems to me like a mess. That spark seems to be gone. Not much of a first post but that's just the way it feels right now. I know it's all gonna pass but still sometimes I get this feeling it's all accumulating and getting worse. Also always had a low self esteem and can't stand up for myself. Well gonna stop my craing now:rolleyes: if someone has some good tips how to set my self on a right path of Gautama it would be great if not consider this as my introductory post:o Take care .

Epicurus

First step imo would be to take care of your low self esteem. The rest will follow.

Ask yourself : Why do you have poor self-esteem, and what you can do to improve it? It's usually about facing fears. It has helped me with my own problems to make a list of fears that plague me. Starting from the most insignificant to the most overwhelming. And then, little by little challenging myself to tackle the insignificant ones whenever an opportunity to do so presents itself.

Welcome

Lostie

Welcome to the club!

You came to the right place. Most members here will be envious of the situation you are in.

username_5

Kundabuffer wrote: »

Hi all

Well gonna stop my craing now:rolleyes: if someone has some good tips how to set my self on a right path of Gautama it would be great if not consider this as my introductory post:o Take care .

I would recommend getting some expert help. You are in your 30s and if I am reading you correctly you feel stuck in a hole, sense a lack of meaning/purpose and have for quite some time despite being a spiritual person and exploring the various approaches out there.

A mentor would be terrific, but they typically don't advertise in the phone book so a trained, experienced psychotherapist would be a good bet. Utilize this person's services to get to the root of that which is most significantly stealing vitality and purpose away from you and from there I think you will find it much easier to develop a spirituality that nourishes and develops you as you need.

Many spiritual practices can be viewed as 'self help' and that is certainly fine, but when one feels they are 'stuck' and attempts to get unstuck aren't working, that typically means we need another person to give us a gentle push out of that rut.

Cinorjer

Start where you are from above is the best advice. The next bit of advice is to be patient. You've had over 30 years to develop your own set of the bad mental habits that cause Suffering. It's going to take some effort and time to allow the 8-Fold path to make a difference.

I started my own Buddhist path at the lowest point in my life. Granted, I had the help of a group that I could practice with. Keep it simple, keep up the effort, and don't kick yourself for not being perfect.

Hope this helps.

Kundabuffer

Thanks you all for the wise words. Well yea it seems the road is gonna be hard and long. But it's gonna also be a struggle because in my early years I remember it was much easier to get the connection with the unknown. It all seems tougher now. As far as the self esteem goes it seems I always had a problem by linking ego and self esteem. I always thought that growing big self esteem would grow the big ego which I always tried not to do. We all know one must be aware of his unimportance to get to the right path but I could have taken it too literally.