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odd debating thought!! - secret conversion?

edited January 2011 in
i've been thinking of beauty of loving kindness meditation and the reasons behind me wanting to keep my conversion to buddhism a secret from my family. How can meditate on wishing all beings peace, calm and wanting to reduce their suffering when if I announce im now a buddhist this would potentially cause my family a lot of suffering?

does this need to keep my new found way of life a secret make me less of a buddhist? I saw another post where anthony touched on this same topic but i'm actively looking to keep my lifestyle quiet?


  • edited January 2011
    No one needs to know. Let the earth be witness to your attainments.
  • I'd tell them. Being open with them will probably end better.
  • Just try talking to them about some buddhist stuff without mentioning it's buddhist or you're buddhist and see how it goes. There is little knowledge of buddhism in this country, so they wouldn't know it was buddhist anyways probably.
  • No one needs to know. Let the earth be witness to your attainments.
    Precisely :cool:
    :D There is no restriction in Buddhism, come and go as one's like. Buddhism is enlightenment and enlightenment is a way of life, and the way of one's life is loving-kindness and tranquility.
  • edited January 2011
    Shut up about it. :D Don't cause suffering and misgivings by immediate proclamations! You can follow a Buddhist path and nobody will be able to put their finger on what's different about you. You'll be kinder and more compassionate and they will LOVE to get that from you. A slow immersion of your family members into your Buddhist "conversion" is advised! That immersion should be accomplished ONLY by your kind and compassionate _actions_ and _deeds_ ALONE! No declarations, no overt gestures. That's how I'd handle it! Good luck!!!
  • Hi Light Lotus,

    Your religion is your own business, but relationships are built on trust and honesty. When a relationship involves the keeping of major secrets, like I have chosen a different religion or I am having an affair, their foundation of trust is gradually weakened. There are compassionate and skilful ways of 'coming out,' so to speak and timing is important. It might be helpful to read how others have done this, but remember that you need courage in life to meet the Dharma/Dhamma, and to be able to love those who find it difficult to accept you as you are. There is no easy path here.
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