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Setting Goals?

clearviewclearview
edited February 2011 in General Banter
What's your opinion on setting goals by a certain time period? I know in the past I've made lists of things to accomplish before a certain time only to be disappointed. At the same time, those goals act as a motivation to better myself every day. I know this is going to sound cheesey, especially because many of you are older and I'm only 17, but I've really liked this girl for a long time. I often dream about her and what not. I feel we are very similar at our core, but my ego has shadowed over me everytime we've hung out, preventing me from expressing my true self. I've used meditation as a way to overcome this. The only thing is I was wondering if it's unskillful to set goals on when to furthur my relationship with her, how to do so, etc. I see this can be considered unmindful since it's not the present moment, but I don't know what else I should do. Anyone willing to give me advice on this it would be greatly appreciated

Comments

  • formermonkJohnformermonkJohn
    far be it from me than to try to tell a 17 yr old how to chase after girls!!
  • LostieLostie Veteran
    edited February 2011
    Setting goals in itself are not unskillful. Attachment to the goals/outcomes are, that is, if you got rejected, heck, just move on to the next one. :)

    Right guys?
  • MystificationMystification
    Do what you think is best in the present moment, for now and the future. But do so without too much thought of the future result, and rather with an awareness of what you are doing in the present moment.
  • SherabDorjeSherabDorje
    Do what you think is best in the present moment, for now and the future. But do so without too much thought of the future result, and rather with an awareness of what you are doing in the present moment.
    Sort of sounds like "just be yourself and go with the flow". I'm 59 and have a teenage son- I guess I would say maybe it's better not to put a time-frame pressure on this. Let it be what it is when it is.
  • MystificationMystification
    Do what you think is best in the present moment, for now and the future. But do so without too much thought of the future result, and rather with an awareness of what you are doing in the present moment.
    Sort of sounds like "just be yourself and go with the flow". I'm 59 and have a teenage son- I guess I would say maybe it's better not to put a time-frame pressure on this. Let it be what it is when it is.
    That's very much what it is. Be with yourself and go with the flow. See how simple it is? See how common it is. See how so many people who you wouldn't consider to be particularly enlightened spiritually are aware of this basic, obvious truth? Sure, the truth can be endlessly complicated. It can also be quite simple. Be yourself. Go with the flow. That says it all, pretty much.
  • robotrobot Veteran
    edited February 2011
    At 19 "be yourself, go with the flow" may seem quite profound. Later in life when you have had struggles and triumphs and failures it really sinks in. One thing that I have never gotten is how to go with the flow in an interaction with a woman that I am interested in. I am still unsure about which "myself" I should be. Spent too much time working with men I guess.
  • taiyakitaiyaki Veteran
    Life doesn't move completely with what we plan (think). What we think and what we actually experience are quite different. It's alright to plan, just leave room for things to not go as you planned.

    With love.
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